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5'9
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writing a dating article and thinking of all the good dating advice i could give to men if they had any finesse
i wish there was like a rollercoaster thingy "you must be THIS tall to ride"

you must have THIS much finesse to follow this tip
like, for instance, the teasing thing. being slightly jokey and teasing on a first date/on a dating app

*whistles* whew boy. i NEVER give that as general advice, because i know men will take that as license to be abrasive dickheads
me with a loudspeaker: HEY FELLAS!!!! BE A LITTLE FLIRTATIOUS! A LITTLE SASSY! GIVE HER BANTER!! TEASE HER LIGHTLY!!!

man following my advice on a first date: so, Shelby, does ur hair always look like shit or did you make a special effort today?
*clutches hair* *weeps* a-all...all the lost opportunities.....the wasted advice.....on these swagless, no-finesse-having heathens...,,,,whyyyyy
women make LOTS of teasing jokes and do LOTS of banter! you just don't notice because they're generally better at it. they don't generally get offended expressions as a reaction. they don't have to follow up with "hey it was just a joke"
teasing is not something that should make the other person ACTUALLY feel bad. i hope u understand this????? men???? guys???? lads??????
teasing is a total Trojan Horse. it's something that makes the other person feel lowkey good, in the DELIVERY of an insult! that's why it's flirtatious!!!! SMH
flirtation: "oh youuu. keep me waiting and i don't even mind at all. please promise me u'll use those powers for good"

insult: "wow. you're super late. i guess it takes you a lot of time to look hot"
so!!! many!!! dudes!!!! do the second one!!! it's horrendous. and that's why i have to stick to safe, general advice. like "if your date apologises for being late, say, 'No worries' and move on"
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