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Nobody’s cheerleader.

Aug 22, 2018, 9 tweets

A troll army was called out to trend #RSSinKerala Here are some gems of imaginary conversation between Head Troll (AM) and New Troll (NT). Thread 👇(1/n)

AM: Let us start with 20,000 RSS volunteers in Kerala
NT: But why do they need our help to trend it?
AM: Shut up and tweet what you are told. (2/n)

NT: But sir last time you said 20,000 in Nepal earthquake, RSS came out to deny it.
AM: What do they know? Anyway change the number to 10,000 if it makes you happy
NT: But why say “shuddering”
AM: Shut up and tweet (3/n)

NT: Sir last tweet made no sense
AM: It doesn’t matter, our people are not so smart; they won’t figure out.
NT; Are you sure?
AM; Yes. See you can even tweet 20,000 engaged in night service
NT: LOL! What is night service?
AM: Doesn’t matter (4/n)

AM: We must mention the “missionarys”
NT: That’s not how you spell it
AM: It’s okay, our target audience does.
NT: Right. Some are even tweeting it twice for double payment (5/n)

NT: Sir people are calling us out saying the pic is not from Kerala
AM: Damn! Get a different pic from Postcard News
NT: But, they just got caught by Alt News for recycling old pics
AM: Again?? Oh no! (6/n)

AM: We need more flowery text. Here is a good one to copy paste
NT: Makes no sense
AM: Shut up and tweet. It made enough sense to so many people who have liked and retweeted it (7/n)

NT: Sir your team is not even copy pasting correctly. The tweets are nonsensical.
AM: I’m paying you to trend the hashtag, not give English lessons (8/n)

NT: Sir, what is this Bharti and Bhartiyo?
AM: Don’t bother, our people will retweet as long as the sentence has the word “Proud” in it
NT: I give up. I quit! (9/9)

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