Thread by @SoozUK

Top 10 jokes of the fringe 2019:

1. "Never mind the turret! We're gonna need a bigger moat" from Shippy Shipshape's 'Bling of my Castle'

2. "Ever seen a camera flash? I have and now that camera is in JAIL WHERE IT BELONGS" from Chris Jeans' 'Straight White Fail'

3. "If I gave the birds tuppence a bag every time I fed them I'd be skint *grabs own genitals*" from Horris Razzmatazz's 'Not For Girls'

4. "Carpets aren't for munching, I've tried it and it was awful, and you could see my floorboards!" from Kitty Uptight's 'Can You Smell Fear?'

5. "I looked out of the window and saw the sun. It was awful! I hate the sun, it is a bad newspaper!" from Timothy Studentface's 'I Started Having Opinions in March'

6. "Jeremy Corbyn is so shit I would flush him down a toilet haha!" from Carl Shoulderchip's 'The Right is Right So Shut Up'

7. "A peach on a robin? I would weep at the sight of it if I still knew how to cry" from Amy Whimsy's 'Hello Rainbow'

8. "If you put a t-shirt on the ground and lie on it you can stop yourself feeling lonely....ER, I'VE HEARD!" from Ben Tinder's 'Being A Single Man Is Funny'

9. "When I was at school I got bullied a lot. The other kids would say 'look at him, he's got 2 eyes!' coz I went to school in space!" from Sid Unusual's 'Should Have Gone On Holiday Instead'

10. "Because Primark!" from Sally Buzzword's 'Bacon Cake Gin Primark'