#YouFindARock.
How could you not, when so many people have clamoured to lick it? You have no idea where it’s from. But it looks tasty.
The fist-sized cluster of crystals is disturbingly large for a chicken tender, yet that’s what it looks like.
>
> Lick
It tastes like nothing.
Absolutely nothing. Not a hint of flavour, a smudge of spice, a whiff of tastiness.
It is the complete absence of stimulation for your taste buds.
>
> Add lemon
You squeeze a lemon on the rock, hoping to improve its flavour.
Wait. ...was that a bubble?!
>
> Upend mild acid upon the crystal
Bubbles! So many bubbles!!
Who needs a fossilized chicken tender when you can have red calcite? So much better. 💜
>
> Praise
“You are SUCH a good crystal cluster!” you tell the calcite confidently. “The hexagonal structure is a nice touch.”
“@ameliarude really got your good side when photographing you,” you continue. “Too bad unscrupulous image-thieves reposted with no context.”
Curiosity satisfied, but not your hunger, you bid the rock a fond farewell and resume your journey.
First stop: snacks.
Next stop: moar rocks.
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