Ok so I’ve just finished watching #IndianMatchmaking and here are some unfiltered thoughts
1. @netflix why? Just why would you blow money on a show that props up an insidious arrangement?
2. This is some fierce romanticisation of arranged marriage for wealthy people.
In most cases, the system is pernicious and caste plays a huge role in deciding marriage especially amongst upper caste folks. Please see work on this by some political scientists.
3. Apart from the total glossing over of how insidiously caste operates in marriage decisions,
the show also glosses over dowry demands which still make their way into marriage transactions, even amongst the wealthy.
4. There is such a huge difference in the way the matchmakers talk to women and men. The message to the women is “compromise”.
5. I see the show as something that does not interrogate the idea of an arranged marriage. Listen, if it works for you, ok. But please realise that many thousands of men and women are forced into it by Preeti aunties.
6. I’m worried about the sexual orientation of at least one of the persons in the show. It made me sad to even think that the person was being forced into a straight marriage situation. The show is totally LGBTQ blind.
7. I’ve had friends who were rejected by this system for many many years and while they ultimately ended up being married, they also suffered severe loss of self-esteem and depression because of the negative things they were told about themselves. It’s not worth it to go through
a process that demeans you as an individual and then says you’ve won once you’ve been traded into a status system determined by patriarchy,
8. Can I offer you a show Netflix, where women basically choose to be single and live happily ever after?
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