Mika McKinnon Profile picture
Field geophysicist, disaster researcher, scifi science consultant, science writer, public speaker, irrepressibly curious. Inactive here, seek elsewhere.

Aug 30, 2020, 9 tweets

To celebrate what would’ve been GateCon weekend, you binge Stargate.

At least, you try to. Rumbling from the local volcano interrupts your revere, forcing you to relocate.

Before you leave, your eyes catch on a distinctive green crystal in the traprock. #YouFindARock

You pluck up the translucent boxy crystals, admiring how they build together to create a distinctive pyramid.

>

> Lick

Apophyllite is a mix of calcium silicates with traces of potassium, sodium, and a hint of fluorite.

It’s safe enough for an inedible rock candy, but doesn’t dissolve in spit so you can’t actually taste it.

>

> zap zap zap

You adjust your Zat'nik'tel to emit in ultraviolet, and zap (or its it zat?) the mineral.

“Oooh, isn’t that a pretty glow!” you exclaim as the Apophyllite fluoresces yellow.

>

> Snuggle

You give the mineral an affectionate cuddle. It has a slightly greasy texture.

It’s probably your imagination, but you could swear you felt it shiver. Or maybe creak?

>

> Snuggle-squish-SQUEEZE

You channel your desire to smash minerals into applying superhuman pressure.

The mineral resists, then succumbs, cleaving tidily along the {001} axis to leave a flat top edge. You snap a thinner piece between your fingers, revealing uneven fracture.

>

> Bake

You chuck the mineral into a portable camp over, twist the dial to “Rock,” then wait.

Slowly, the mineral dehydrated and peels apart like leaves.

“Ahhh, so THAT’S why you’re called Apophyllite,” you crow triumphantly. “Apo for off, and phyllos for leaf.”

> Dazed

You look around in confusion. You’re not sure why you’re here or what you’re doing.

>

> Nap

You yawn, and stretch, and dream of rocks. (...a day later. Naps are like that.)

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