Thread by @rebelrealcanon

Thread of every single #StarWars belief that is not only fundamentally integral to my canon...but has also caused some online fanboy to lose his or her mind with anger, blocking and even threatening me on occasion!

In no order whatsoever, to be added to as things occur to me.

No xenophobic empire; in fact, no widespread xenophobia of any kind at all. Utterly impossible for systemic xenophobia to exist in a population exceeding 100 quadrillion beings of 20 million races that have lived together in an area of 1 billion settled systems for 30k+ yrs

The English word "alien" not only doesn't exist, it has no analogue. Again, 20 million races have been occupying 1 billion systems for 30,000 years. "Extraterrestrial" is meaningless in that context. "Alien" and "nonhuman" are words, and concepts, for us alone on Earth.

Nothing takes place after the last line of Zahn's 𝘝𝘪𝘴𝘪𝘰𝘯 𝘰𝘧 𝘵𝘩𝘦 𝘍𝘶𝘵𝘶𝘳𝘦. There is no canonical content after that point; no exceptions. Period. It is utterly impossible to know what happened in the Star Wars galaxy after the Star Wars ended.

Booster and Mirax Terrik have dark skin.

Zabrak Lady Revan.

Anakin Skywalker's father was the Jedi Feemor, the son of a farmer and Qui-Gon's former apprentice. Qui-Gon was drawn to Mos Epsa and the "disturbance" in the Force due to his connection with his first Padawan.

Zuckuss is a female.

Jango was not raised by Mandalorians because Mandalorians were long extinct by Ep2. He found and followed the code as he found it, as did Boba, and they styled their armor after them, but the people had died out easily 1000 years before.

Speaking of people who died out, Darth Plagueis was dead some ten or dozen years before Episode I took place.

Speaking of Darth Plagueis, there's no such thing as the "Rule of Two." It was a Sith philosophical concept Darth Bane came up with, but it was unworkable and died with him. Dooku probably planted the concept in the Jedi Archive to misdirect them away from Palpatine's many Sith.

Oh, speaking of Palpatine's many Sith--yeah, Anakin did not slaughter the younglings in the Council chamber. Anakin took them to be trained as Dark Side Inquisitors and the blond kid grows up to become the primary villain in 𝘛𝘩𝘦 𝘙𝘶𝘪𝘯𝘴 𝘰𝘧 𝘋𝘢𝘯𝘵𝘰𝘰𝘪𝘯𝘦

Also, Obi-Wan lied abt having seen Anakin kill younglings at all. This isn't a headcanon thing; it's literally what the film shows. We see everything Obi-Wan sees and there's no slaughtered kids on that camera. And get real--there's no cameras in the COUNCIL CHAMBER of all places

Where was I? Oh yeah. Boba Fett.

The Daniel Keys Moran story is not canonical in my book, so I don't need to explain Jaster Mereel. He doesn't exist. Mandalorians do not survive into the modern era, period. Boba Fett is not a Mandalorian. He is his own man who adapted their code

While I'm at it, the Slave I is not in Episode II. That's a Firespray Class-I, name unknown, belonging to Jango Fett. Boba Fett's Class-II is a clearly different ship Kuat personally built for him based on Boba's feedback from the ship he was familiar with as a child.

There are exactly THREE colors of lightsaber.

Jedi, who use natural crystals, have an equal chance of building a green or blue saber (and to be perfectly honest, I don't even think they can plan on one)

Sith, using synthetic crystals, get red

This is according to George Lucas.

But now is a good time to let you know that I don't just accept everything George Lucas decides and saying "well Lucas decided" is not going to have the littlest impact on what I find to be canon or not

Star Wars has a self-affirming canon. No outside authority can determine it.

Nothing published after 2012 is part of my Star Wars, but nothing is automatically canon just based on publication date. There are many books, some comics, and more video games that aren't part of it despite being published before 2012. I have to discover the truth case by case.

The six-film saga covers a 42-year period:

Episode I -- followed by 13 years
Episode II -- followed by 3 years
Episode III -- covering 6 months, followed by 22 years
Episode IV -- followed by 3 years
Episode V -- followed by 6 months -- Episode VI

The films bear this out easily

Related: Episode III covers a six-month period where Padmé goes from having pretty much just found out that she's pregnant to going into premature labor and giving birth to twins. Not only does trauma frequently cause premature birth, twins also are often born prematurely as well

Oh, this is barely headcanon bc it seems like a simple statement of fact to me, but people on Twitter did yell at me for it!

We don't know what the Galactic Basic language sounds like. It's impossible for it to be English. It's an unknown trade language translated for earthlings

Jocasta Nu deleted Kamino from the Jedi Archives because she was in love with Count Dooku who was in love with Jango Fett.

She probably helped him plant that Rule of Two nonsense at the same time.

"Tusken Raider" is a slur and Lucas obviously presents it as such in the films.

Cliegg Lars arranged Shmi's death for some kind of insurance payout to get his farm out of the hole.

Han and Greedo fired blaster shots simultaneously.

Han killed Greedo in self-defense even in the film shown on May 25, 1977.

Kit Fisto's fate is unknown. He is not the unnamed Nautolan Council Member in Episode III and frankly it's kinda racist of you to even suggest that. They don't even look the same.

Bib Fortuna is not a Twi'lek. Most of the stuff in the Return of the Jedi novelization isn't canonical. And male Twi'leks do not have human ears; the idea that anyone could think so or defend that position is ludicrous. It's a biological absurdity without any grip on reality.

Luke Skywalker is an asexual character. This does not mean he's unaware of the existence of physically attractive people or that he's incapable of marriage or reproduction. It does mean no part of his character is sexually driven. Mara was his only love and only intimate partner.

Actually it's only a presumption on my part that Luke and Mara got married and named their son Ben. He proposed, she accepted, so it's a reasonable assumption to make. But since we can't know anything that happens after the last page of VOTF, it's still an assumption.

Wedge married Qwi Xux. He and Iella were never an item, never attracted to one another, and sure as hellfire never got married.

BRAND NEW... Came up with the theory and announced it less than a week ago and got yelled at within ten minutes of making it public!

The two Ewoks movies take place about 150 years after the Battle of Endor; Cindel and Mace are Luke Skywalker's great-great grandchildren.

I could add that Catarine (Ben Skywalker's granddaughter) and Mace aren't killed, but nobody's ever yelled at me about that. I guess much too distracted by my placing the date where the original filmmakers did? If you yell at me now, you'll unlock that qualification for me! 😌