Have you ever felt like you were living for your parents?
Well, Mozart did.
So, how did Mozart free himself from his tyrannical father to become one of the greatest composers of all time?
From the very beginning, Mozart was considered legendary.
He presented evidence of exceptional ability when he was quite young.
Mozart began playing the violin and harpsichord when he was 3 years old...
(harpsichord is an instrument similar to a piano)
His father, Leopold Mozart, immediately recognized his son's musical talent.
Leopold was a professional musician himself and he was regarded as highly skilled by many.
Leopold trained young Mozart for long hours and by the time Mozart was 5, he was already proficient in playing the violin and harpsichord.
Mozart's sister also showed talent.
Leopold trained both of his kids.
He was basically what we would call today, a stage parent.
Once young Mozart began writing his own compositions at age 6, Leopold gave up his professional goals and taught his kids full-time.
Leopold took his children on a tour around Europe during this period.
The kids would play for royalty and be paid in jewelry and other precious items.
This tour went well.
It lasted for 3 years and afterward Mozart would begin a more independent career producing his own works.
That didn't mean his father was not involved though...
Many Mozart biographies describe Leopold as being overbearing, narcissistic, and abusive.
Leopold had a desire to dominate his son's career and control his every move.
Where did this desire in Leopold come from though?
Well, Leopold, like many parents, was not happy with his own life.
He did not live up to his dreams and his son's transcendence of him did not sit well within his mind.
So, Leopold chose to live vicariously through his son.
He was so possessive and controlling of young Mozart because he saw that his son was in a way, himself, or at least what he wanted to be.
This tumultuous relationship between Mozart and his father erupted when Mozart refused a position his father had obtained for him.
He was to play and compose for the court of Salzburg's archbishop.
The restriction that the archbishop's court put on Mozart's creative endeavors was the straw that broke the camel's back...
Mozart had been controlled by his father all his life and he couldn't stand the extra control the court had over him.
"Salzburg is not a place for my talent ... The archbishop could not pay me enough for the slavery in Salzburg."
Mozart left his father and moved to Munich.
After a short time composing music for patrons there, he eventually settled in Vienna where he would primarily spend the rest of his days.
Although Mozart still communicated with his father for several years, he slowly gained more and more independence.
The father did not like this loss of control...
Leopold said all sorts of bizarre things in his letters to Mozart.
Leopold would voice his concerns about how the family had enemies conspiring against them or describe how miserable his life was - clearly trying to manipulate Mozart through guilt.
Leopold was sick in the mind.
And when Mozart would confront Leopold about this nonsense, his father would try to gaslight him.
Leopold would completely deny reality and form a new reality in which he was not guilty of anything.
You may have experienced gaslighting in your life before...
It's awful.
Now, obviously, there's a lot to unpack here and we don't have time to examine everything about this unhealthy father-son relationship, so what do we need to take from this story?
Well, if you are the kid and you have a parental relationship that resembles this, you need to PHYSICALLY MOVE when the time comes.
Avoid staying in your hometown after high school and move to a new city or state.
Physically moving to a different place makes a hell of a difference when it comes to freeing yourself.
When Mozart did this, he was able to go on to produce some of his greatest work.
He was no longer muzzled by his father.
When he took the leap to leave his family's nest, his creativity and potential were able to reach heights they never would have, if he had stayed under the thumb of his father.
Leopold was always looking to temper his creativity and not push the boundaries too much.
And if you are the parent, do everything you can to aid your children in actualizing their own potential.
Avoid forcing any of your own unfulfilled dreams onto your kids.
Many parents are unaware they're even doing it!
Parents living through their kids is a huge deal and hardly anyone talks about it.
It makes for misery all around.
The goal should be for your kids to ascend to the greatest heights they can, but in their own unique way - not some sort of twisted half version of your heights.
This is pretty heavy stuff.
But it's important to end here with the fact that Mozart and his father's relationship was eventually rekindled.
After enough time, they both had a better understanding of each other and themselves.
Don't lose hope if you're experiencing something similar to what Mozart and his father experienced!
KNOWLEDGE
- If you have a toxic relationship with your parent(s), physically move! It's the only way to gain complete freedom.
- As a parent, make sure that you are not using your child as a means to live out your own dreams. Your kids will have their own lives and it's your… twitter.com/i/web/status/1…
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