Thread by @MeetJess

They told me parenting would be hard.
They didn’t say I’d be managing airborne transmission, collapsed institutions, and mass delusion before my morning coffee.

A 🧵 for the last parents standing:

I always dreamed of being a mom.
I just didn’t realize it would involve explaining virology to my toddler while dodging gaslighting from school boards and Facebook moms named Cheryl.

Parenting in 2025 is such a vibe.
All you have to do is protect your child from airborne pathogens, collapsing institutions, government indifference, and other parents’ opinions.
But, like, positively.

My parenting aesthetic is:
-Slightly feral
-Emotionally exhausted
-Air filtration enthusiast
-5% “live, laugh, love,”
-95% “what fresh hell is this?”

We still mask.
I know. It’s shocking.
Some people use seatbelts too, even if the car hasn’t crashed yet.
Wild, right?

My kid wears an N95.
Do people stare? Sure.
But we love attention from folks whose idea of science is “my cousin got it and was fine.”

My child:
-Knows how to fit test a mask
-Can explain airborne transmission
-Still thinks kindness matters

I’m raising a small scientist with trust issues. Iconic.

Other parents are like “Let them build immunity!”
To what?
Heart inflammation?
Brain fog?
Medical gaslighting?
We’re good, thanks.

Every day I teach my kid that being the only one doing the right thing is hard.
But worth it.
Even when the world is throwing viral tantrums in your direction.

I’m not scared.
I’m just unwilling to pretend a disabling airborne virus is “no big deal” because everyone got bored.

I love being the “weird mom.”
The one who brings her own HEPA filter to the birthday party.
The one who doesn’t treat illness as a character-building activity.
The one whose kid still has functioning lungs.

Remember when parenting meant playdates and preschool tours?

Now it means knowing more about aerosol science than most school boards.
And trying to explain it with crayons.

People ask if I’m “isolating” my child.
Only from things like heart damage and executive dysfunction, yes.
But socially? We just hang out with people who still give a damn.

They say kids are resilient.
They also said the Titanic was unsinkable.
Spoiler: the iceberg didn’t care.

So no, I don’t regret being “that mom.”
The annoying one.
The extra one.
The one who didn’t look away.

They said “it takes a village.”
They just didn’t mention the village would be on fire, anti-science, and offended by masks.

So to sum it up

Parenting in 2025:
We’re doing arts and crafts in a world actively trying to gaslight us into giving up.
But our glitter is filtered, and our kids?
They’re still safe.

End/