Thread by @leeseongwee

Much has been written about Randy Fine from #Florida #USA but what screams out to be noticed are the voluminous stains that weigh down that fellow. Here is the description in eleven parts, cementing him in history…

Oh, Randy Fine, the name unwinds,
Reveals a Harvard boy with a twisted mind,
From Cambridge halls, he rose to fame,
A dimly-lit Piece of Shit, a wretched shame!

His silver spoon, it shaped his climb,
Yet devoid of empathy that he left behind,
A Baker Scholar? … Nah he’s unrefined,
Cos morals rot and die inside Randy Fine.

A baby’s death, he mocked with glee,
“Quite well,” he sneered, for all to see,
“Kill them all,” he screamed, unhinged,
A soul so dark, it makes us cringe.

Alumni? Harvard’s rep has been maligned,
He bullies, he curses, and he undermines,
“No mercy, bombs”, his heart’s design,
Go fuck yourself, Fat Bigot Randy Fine!

Anger courses through his spine,
Hate fills his soul that is misaligned,
A mind so warped, it can’t define,
Left us with a stain called Randy Fine.

So here’s the truth, for all to find,
An unholy monster lurks in Randy Fine,
No moral compass, no more hope,
Just Depraved Randy, a Fucking Dope!

Randy Fine, a man so bland,
Takes up more space than most had planned.
He walks real slow, wobbles through,
Casting huge shadows wide and true.

You think the glow upon his face,
Would light up a brain that’s been misplaced,
Nope, no such luck, too long a wait,
That fat slob is so stupid, it’s just fate.

With skin so thick, like a fortress strong,
That was a pun but he’ll laugh along.
So let’s raise a toast, a feast divine,
And throw it in the face of Randy Fine!

Randy Fine, oh what a sight,
A gravitational force will endanger flight.
The plane will crash if he’s in the seat
Don’t let him fly, best roll him down the street.

But brace yourself, for here’s the twist,
When you suggest a meal, he won’t resist,
Buffets empty quick and diners weep,
Randy Fine eats everything then goes to sleep.

@threadreaderapp please unroll