The first time was before debut.
Jin had just moved into the dorm with a group of boys that might become his bandmates. And he was a little worried.
Laying on his bed one night, he looked up frowned into the darkness. Maybe this was a bad idea. He missed being home, +
Jin had come into the company very optimistic. Even though he hadn't been trained in dance or singing, he figured, why not give it a try, right? It could be fun.
Then another trainee had laughed, calling his voice nasal. He stopped singing down the halls.
He used to like the dancing. Fast steps and a satisfying workout.
But then another trainee had made fun of his dancing, and he stopped moving along with as much enthusiasm. It was becoming easier to take on that "cold" persona he had been given.
But, he thought sadly, he WANTED to stay. He wanted to be close to the other members he was placed with. He wanted to get along.
He heard a sniffle from one of the bunks, and he froze.
The sniffling came again, and it was from Jungkook's bed.
"Jungkook?" he called out softly. The sniffles stopped on a dime. "Is that you?"
"It's stupid, I'm sorry, I'll be quiet."
"No, seriously, what is it?" Jin tried to soften his voice, but he wasn't sure how effective it would be. Leaning forward, he squinted into the dark, trying to see him.
He waited, and wondered if Jungkook was ignoring his question. Namjoon's snores rang out unceremoniously above their heads.
"I just... Miss home."
Of course Jungkook would miss home. The kid was so young. What was he, 14? 15? And he barely spoke, just hovering around the edges of conversations, wide, bugging eyes that looked fearful and lost.
Jungkook sniffed hard again, a little sob escaping him. "Y-yeah. One hyung."
"It's rough. I'm the youngest, too." Jin didn't know why that was relevant, but it felt like it had the time. Jin stared at the dark shadow of Jungkook for a moment.
Jungkook was silent, as if holding his breath.
Jin patted the sheet gently, knowing Jungkook could hear the sound. "Come on, it's fine. I'm feeling a little lonely too, actually."
"Of course," Jin said, although truth be told, he wasn't used to sharing beds with other guys, he figured this case was a good enough exception. "Come on."
"You're homesick, too?" Jungkook said quietly.
"Yeah, I am," responded Jin.
"You wanna talk about it?"
"No, I just.." Jungkook paused.
"I just don't want to be alone."
"Fair enough," Jin said. He could tell Jungkook was on the verge of tears again, so he acted nonchalant. "Big spoon or little spoon?"
Seokjin threw his arm around the boy's waist, drawing him back and into him. He could smell Jungkook's shampoo and feel his nervousness, but they didn't speak anymore they night.
That was the first time.
They had just finished practice, and the maknae was laying on the floor near the low table, a pillow hugged to his chest as he stared at the wall. Seokjin slipped out of the shower & found him there.
And Jungkook? He needed more time. And that was okay, they had decided.
"Huh?" JK touched his fingertips to his cheeks, and frowned. "Oh, I feel hot."
The smile on Jin's face faded. He crouched +
JK pouted, hugging his pillow tighter. "I'm just sleepy, that's all."
Jin shook his head softly, rolling his eyes. He grunted, laying down next to Jungkook and scooping him up in his arms, hugging +
"What're you doing to Jungkook?"
"I'm cuddling him,"Jin said matter of factly. "Because he's feeling sick."
"Ah," Namjoon paused. Then came +
"No thanks, I think I've got this one," Jin chuckled.
Namjoon walked out, and the room went quiet. JK's eyes had fluttered shut, and he let out a little sigh. Things were still +
Jin shuffled in a bit closer, until his nose was buried in Jungkook's hair. He sighed.
He had caught a strong whiff of a smell that was not his own, and out of curiosity, he paused with the shirt halfway pulled over his face.
It took him a moment to realize that it was the smell of JK.
Their debut stage, for Seokjin, had been awful as all hell. He had already been nervous, he was already stressed.
And then, during their stage, the most embarrassing thing had happened.
Seokjin's pants had slipped.
But Jin... Felt his loose waistband betray him, and the pants, weighted down by the microphone pack, had slide down +
A couple of the staff reassured him not to worry. But Jin had cried. Maybe it wasn't the most manly reaction, but the buildup, the pressure, was so much.
There was no replay for this one.
He hadn't talked about the incident since it had happened, avoiding it and acting like he was fine.
Jungkook was there, staring into the mostly empty fridge.
Jungkook whirled around, not knowing Jin was that close, and a tiny smile flickered across his mouth.
"Oh, I was just checking for leftovers..."
Jin hummed, not thinking much of it.
Jungkook turned back to the fridge, closing the door and +
"Jungkook? Are you hungry?"
JK was licking his fingers clean of the flaky powder & stopped. "Uh, I'm ok. I have this."
JK's eyes flickered away, and he crumpled at the bag a little nervously, as though ashamed. "I... I spent it all already."
Jin considered for a moment, and then felt his stomach drop. Jungkook was still hungry.
JK's eyes widened, and that fearful, lost look came again. "Hyung, I didn't--"
"You didn't do anything, don't worry." Jin smiled.
It hadn't been the first time Jin had brought a friend over for dinner +
He patted the boy's shoulder when they were being walked over to their table. "Hey, cat got your tongue?"
"It's so fancy..."
Jin looked around at the crystal chandeliers and tablecloths.
Jungkook whirled around, almost angry as he stared up at him.
He hissed, so that Jin's family couldn't hear. "I didn't know you were rich!!"
Jin blinked, then laughed.
"We're not rich, I promise. My dad just +
Jungkook didn't talk for awhile after that, as if soaking in the information. They sat down, and Jungkook seemed to have no confidence in ordering, so Jin recommended drinks and an appetizer for him, which he +
When the food came, Jungkook seemed determined to balance polite manners with a ravenous appetite, +
"Jungkook, you can relax," said Jin's older brother. "It's just us."
Jin chuckled into his glass.
"It's nice to feed a dongsaeng," Jin said calmly. "Even if he has sauce all over his cheek."
Jungkook gasped, making the day of +
"Did I get it?"
"Most of it, yeah," Jin shook his head. He took his own napkin and dabbed the rest of it away, holding +
In the midst of their conversation, the time with his parents, the food, & teasing the youngest, Jin realized that he had somehow forgotten about The Mic Incidient.
"Thank you for the meal, Mr. and Mrs. Kim," said Jungkook, leaning toward the front seat, his voice light and happy.
"You're very welcome," said his father, glancing into the rear view +
And Jungkook nodded. And he would, and he would go to Jin's house often. Jin thought that the visits helped a bit with the homesickness, and expected that JK would sneak into his bed less often. But quite the opposite was true.
(Get your mind out of the gutter, it's still early! )
It was an early morning, and Jin woke up puffy-eyed and exhausted. Things we're starting to pick up, and schedules were getting busier. They were doing variety shows, interviews, music shows, Twitter posts, practices, and more.
But Jin was glad he stayed. No, really.
But some days, stress piles up, and there's no label for all the different contributing factors that leads up to it, and the straw that breaks the camel's back is such a miniscule and ridiculous thing.
Also, Jin is good at waking him.
No sound. Jungkook slept like the dead.
It took six rounds of gentle nudging, to shoulder shaking, back rubbing, and finally a double nipple twist to get the youngest awake.
He knew that if left to his own devices, Jungkook would probably oversleep every goddamn day. Their schooling was flexible, too, but there was something +
Jin sat down, waiting for the electric kettle to heat up, and checked his phone.
He had received a text from an old classmate, someone he had once gotten along well with, and had drifted from after graduation.
He would learn later that the old "friend" had accidentally given out the phone number for "Jin FROM BTS" and that the +
It felt like a betrayal he would have never suspected.
"It's nothing," he shrugged. "Just some stupid hater."
Normally, it wasn't something Jin would let under his skin. Perhaps that habit of impenetrability was +
"Hyung, don't cry, please."
Jin sniffed, then tried to laugh it off. Tried to tell Jungkook he was fine. But the stress of their schedule+
"Hyung, don't let it get to you." Jungkook's words were so simple, but they felt sincere. "You +
Jin blinked. A proclamation of unconditional love was not the thing he had been expecting, truth be told.
He hiccuped again. "What?"
"We love you and need you. You're important to us, so whatever it is..."
"What makes you say that?"
"I dunno, I just.. when I woke up I realized you do a lot of little things, especially for me and Taehyung and Jimin."
Jin wiped the tear streaks from his cheeks.
"You drive me to school so often," said JK with a smile. "And it's so early."
JK smiled. He stood up, taking Jin's hand. Wordlessly, he squeezed it, and Jin felt a thousand words that Jungkook wasn't very good at expressing being shot through to his heart at that one, little reassuring squeeze.
And as natural as could be, Jungkook held Jin's hand most of the drive, comforting him without words.
Jin realized that Jungkook was growing up, and so was he.
Bangtan had EXPLODED. They went from when Yoongi handmade gifts for all their fans (with a little help, mostly from Jimin) to a point where they were filling up venues. It was amazing.
This world, this experience, was amazing.
Seokjin was laying on the couch, watching TV, soon to be victim
Instead, he lands butt-first right on Seokjin's stomach.
"OOF!" Seokjin grunted, hands flying up to push off the offending body.
"Sorry, hyung!" JK called out, flailing to his feet & running away, Tae close behind.
That was weird.
He was taller now, and more social with the others.
Seokjin's heart was warmed by the thought that they had grown up together.
"Hey," Jin said. "I noticed today that JK's grown up a lot."
"Yeah," Yoongi muttered. "He's grown like a weed. So have Tae and Jimin."
Yoongi snorted. "He hasn't acted like a little kid for awhile."
"Hm?" Seokjin pulled off his sweater, preferring to sleep shirtless on these hot nights. Yoongi glanced up, smirking and continued writing.
Seokjin stood still like a statue, looking over at Yoongi. "W-what?"
"Yeah, he really likes the smaller uke stuff. Softer stories instead of the sex-only oneshots."
"I know he really liked it if he keeps it for awhile. I think he copies some of the art down into his sketchbook."
Seokjin said nothing. "Well, I guess he doesn't hang out with girls very much, so..."
"You kidding? The boy's been bi-curious since the day he got here."
"Count the number of the times the kid compliments a body part," Yoongi chuckled, "In a SINGLE DAY. He's been obsessed with your shoulders lately."
"Everyone jokes about them, though, to be fair. Even me."
"Only if you clean them off when you're done, you slob," said Yoongi. "They're in the top drawer."
"Jin is just now noticing Jungkook's budding sexuality," commented Yoongi without looking up."
"Oh, he's been bi-curious since he got here," Namjoon said breezily.
Namjoon frowned at Seokjin. "We were roommates."
"Oh my god, they were roommates," Yoongi shot out automatically, rolling his eyes.
"He's not subtle, I mean, it's healthy for a kid his age." Namjoon just shrugged. "Goodnight."
After a moment, Jin realized that JK's hand +
Signals were confusing.
He didn't know.
Seokjin hadn't even had his first kiss.
But his own? He didn't know about that.
What was his favorite feature on Jungkook, he thought? The first thing he had noticed was his big eyes, all wide and lost like a stray lamb.
Scratch that. It still was.
Was it the cheek scar? Jin traced his finger along it. It ran in a little line along the apple of one cheek, barely +
Seokjin turned to look at JK's mouth. The sharply angled cupid's bow, the little beads of sweat on his philtrum. Seokjin smiled.
Jungkook muttered a little in his sleep, wriggling and adjusting his head on the pillow, lips pressing together.
His lips were soft, and warm. Seokjin swallowed. Then, he crinkled his brow, and pushed somewhat roughly against JK's mouth, squishing his lips in +
Still amused, Jin sighed. It wouldn't be right, to steal what would be both of their first kisses.
He falls to sleep, his breath evening out, as a very confused Jungkook opens his eyes and stares at his eldest hyung, utterly baffled.
He lay there, watching Jin's handsome face in the glow of the nightlight. Then, realizing there was nothing else to be done that night, he went back to sleep.
There wasn't much time to sit and linger on it during their comeback, but when they were given a few days off to go home, Jungkook started to sense the changes.
For one thing, even at their homes, all of +
JK also noticed that Jin didn't talk to him as much directly as he did during the last few months. It was odd, but he didn't know what to say or how to ask about it, so they ignored it.
Bangtan was too important to him, now.
JK called him old.
Jin called him a child.
Jimin laughed hard.
His phone blipped with a message.
Then, "you wanna go out for ice cream tomorrow? Hyung will treat you."
Jungkook stared at the texts, and mused.
Was he saying things he shouldn't to Jin?
They all knew Jin's tendency to keep his struggles close to his chest. Sometimes they didn't hear until months after that he had been hurt by something.
Maybe he was just over thinking things. He went to bed.
He wore a set of Daffy Duck pajamas he had bought in Busan, and the elders teased him for being too cute.
Jimin snapped a pic, too amused.
"Where is everyone?" he asked.
"Asleep," Yoongi said, "As you should be."
"I'll see if we have any ramen," Yoongi offered. He stood up, going to the kitchen.
Namjoon remained, shuffling his long legs around a bit & checking his phone.
JK looked toward the doors to their bedrooms, & turned to Joon.
"Sure, kiddo, what's up?"
Jungkook bit his lip, and looked at the floor.
"Um... It's kind of embarrassing. And I might be wrong, but... What would happen if one of the members were to...like.. fall in love?"
Jungkook flushed. "No, I mean. What if... One of the members... Have feelings for m-... For one of the other members? Is that weird?"
Namjoon tilted his head. "Well, I don't know? I don't have +
Jungkook hugged his pillow tighter. "I dunno. Some things have just been happening between us. I don't know if I'm reading wrong."
"Well," he said slowly. "Change can be very scary. But it's often a good thing. I think you +
Jungkook just nodded.
"Do you know who I'm talking about, hyung?"
Joon looked at him, opened his mouth to speak, but Yoongi came into the room again, then, & the subject changed.
Seokjin really, truly wasn't sure who did it first.
He just wanted to make sure his competitive ass did it LAST.
Seokjin was just laying on a little couch, waiting his turn for makeup and hair. Innocent as could be, he would argue.
"Hey! Get off," Seokjin shrieked, trying to wriggle him away. But JK's thighs pinned him down, and he wasn't at a complimentary angle, so +
Jungkook continued to drum like his (soon to be short) life depended on it.
Jin went back to his phone, and JK upped the ante.
JK stopped drumming, and suddenly tilted the heel of his palms down, kneading deeply down onto Jin's butt.
But holy shit, he was really going at it. It HURT.
JK snickered, fingers clenching down spider-like and shoving haphazardly.
JK just laughed again, squeezed and holding onto two handfuls of Jin's ass, like he owned the place. Jin wriggled around, glaring at the maknae.
"I'm warning you, Kook."
However, the maknae got to him first.
Seokjin, in a fit of fury, tried to throw off JK's hands and reach both hands for his nipples, but JK deflected each time.
"Jin, come on," sighed Hoseok. "We need to get ready."
He froze, bewildered, hands still locked on JK's chest like he was a mad scientist turning the dials to a machine suddenly beyond his control. And left himself vulnerable.
"AHHHHH!" Seokjin shrieked, his face going red as JK squeezed and kneaded at the now very reddened and stinging skin.
A little taunting was normal, between guys. No homo and all that.
But Jungkook? Didn't seem to know when to stop.
Then, something happened. One could call it, a misunderstanding.
But when JK heard was, "Do you want an ass-kissing, Jeon Jungkook?"
"W-what? What's an ass-kissing?"
Jin blinked. "Huh?"
It was hard enough that JK stumbled a little.
"HE started it!"
Yoongi rolled his eyes. "He's just trying to rile you up, stop playing into it."
The stakes had risen.
So he started to retaliate in the comfort of their home, whereas JK continued to do it on camera as much as possible.
Seokjin froze, halfway down the hall when he heard Yoongi talking to Jimin.
"They HAVE been a little obvious."
Was there a way to just enjoy teasing each other without it getting complicated? He didn't know.
But something about Jin was starting to get under his skin, & like an open wound, he wanted to scratch at it fitfully until he had eradicated whatever it was.
"HEY!" Jin snapped, as JK knocked the phone out of his hand, making it clatter to the floor.
"Ugh, stop it!" Jin cried out as JK flopped painfully down on top of him. JK got an elbow to the stomach, but it was worth it bc the itch seemed to subside.
"How's it look?" Jin asked, tilting his head to look in the mirror.
"It looks different dried,"
JK frowned, sipping at his banana milk and going back to trying to get a higher top score in Piano Tiles.
Jin looked like a whole different person. He smiled into his reflection, looking a tad nervous, but overall pleased. "I like it, it's...new."
JK got the urge again. He frowned.
Jungkook looked up, offered a grimace, and went back to his phone. The urge was bubbling. He didn't think he could hold out against it.
When they walked in the dorm door, Jin slapped JK on the shoulder.
"What do you think, Kook?"
Jin choked. "What?!"
"Yeah, just odd and big shouldered and..." JK gesticulated aimlessly. "I dunno."
"You're just jealous," Jin said, jutting his chin forward petulantly. "Because I look so damn good."
"That's elementary shit," JK laughed. "It really looks odd on you."
He'd been found out.
Jin's eyes widened, and he released JK's hair from his hand.
However, before, he could react, he saw Jin's eyes follow the movement of JK's tongue as it wetted his upper lip, and this seemed to inspire the elder in an impulsive movement.
JK flailed backward, but only met the wall of the hallway, where the +
Jin pulled back, eyes wide.
"I thought you were gonna try to escape or pull away..." Jin mumbled. "What the fuck."
He escaped into his room, and slammed the door shut.