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Crash @CrashChaosCats
, 15 tweets, 3 min read Read on Twitter
When I first started detransitioning 6 years ago, most people I knew had never encountered a detrans woman before. If I came out to people as detrans, I had a lot of explaining to do. This is still mostly true today. Lots of people I run into have no idea women like me exist.
It's pretty stressful being something that few have ever heard about and having to educate people about being detransitioned. You don't know how people are going to react until you tell them, though thankfully most people I've told have reacted well.
I started a blog to get my experiences out there and connect with other detransitioned and dysphoric women. To find others like me and give them support. I started talking to journalists to make detransitioned women's experiences more visible and better understood.
Detransitioned women started talking to journalists a couple of years ago because we didn't see our stories in the media. When we read articles written about detransition we didn't see ourselves reflected in them. Often we found existing media misleading, ignorant or offensive.
We wanted to see media that represented our experiences and made our lives more visible. We wanted more people to know detransitioned women exist and what our lives are like. So some of us agreed to be interviewed to help out our community.
It's so surreal to see people act like our experiences are over-represented when there have been like four articles in-depth articles about us in two years. Where is this world where everyone already knows what a detransitioned woman is, cuz I'm not living in it?
Every time we've worked to get our stories into the media there's been backlash. People say they're the "wrong" detransition stories to tell or they've been told the wrong way or too much attention is focused on us.
The people who've objected to the articles I and other detransitioned women have been in don't care about what we think of the articles, whether we think it's a good representation or not.
Trans people don't get to decide what counts as good representation of detransitioned people. Detransitioned people do. We get to decide whether media representations accurately and respectfully represent us or not.
People need to listen to detransitioned people when we express our thoughts and feelings about how we're portrayed. Take us seriously when we say a journalist got our stories right or raised important points about issues that affect our lives.
And listen to us when we point how people distort or misrepresent our experiences, whether it's trans people or right-wingers or feminists or whoever else. We have a lot of problems with other people acting like they know our lives better than we do. It's very frustrating.
It's super stressful going public as a detransitioned woman. For every one of us that speaks out, there are many more women who can't risk it, don't want to deal with the backlash or just want to get on with their lives.
It's a lot of responsibility representing a marginalized, misunderstood group that's already got enough bullshit to deal with. I've gone into every interview I've done with very clear ideas of what I want to say, what main points I want to get across.
Detransitioned women have valuable perspectives on dysphoria, transitioning and trying to survive a in patriarchal society that hates gender nonconformity. We're not scare stories, we're social critics working towards our freedom.
We've only just begun to speak out. We have so much more we need to say and we're going to keep speaking out until we're heard.
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