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Thread by @WhiteCovenant: "dear Mom I'm sorry to tell you we lost Kayleigh last night together with the whole Feminist Corps. Turns out they were all freebleeding and […]" #secondcivilwarletters

4 tweets
dear Mom
I'm sorry to tell you we lost Kayleigh last night together with the whole Feminist Corps.
Turns out they were all freebleeding and that attracted all of the bears on a 200 mile radius.
And Mom, would you believe it? the bears are not vegan!!
Help
#secondcivilwarletters
Quartermaster General,
I must demand most seriously that you immediately double our ration of dildos. We have had several members of the Trans Brigade break into the barracks of the 1st Gay Batallion to steal dildos.
Yours Sincerely,
General X
#secondcivilwarletters
Supreme Commander,
With deep sadness I have to report the complete loss of the 2nd Special Lesbian Unit. Last night a small skirmish with some members of the Trans Brigade led to a violent incident that left 824 dead from both units.
The bloodshed is regrettable but we fight on
Dear Significant Other,
The Redhats are madmen who've blown up all of our ART suplies. Three quarters of the Gay Brigade are incapable of moving due to an AIDS flareup.
I'm trying to care for them but it's hard to stop them from having sex with each other.
#secondcivilwarletters
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