I hope we can stay in 0⃣. 👇
I'm not an expert on how to deal with this stuff either, despite it happening to me every day.
I'm by no means I suggesting that this methodology will be "okay" for all folks of color.
You're taking a risk in doing this, just know that and be okay with that.
0⃣ Make a conscientious effort to see it *always.* I bet you encounter it more often than you see.
0⃣ Call out your white friends first. We have a bigger impact and will be heard by people who already are invested in us and care for us.
"This person arrived first."
"This person was in front of you."
(Also use gender-neutral, non race-based terms when addressing strangers. Avoid "ma'am" or "sir" or other gross condescending words.)
Note: They're often not in a position of power, as service industry is very power-shifted to "customer is always right." So, even WP to WP, service person is in less power.
Leaving room for discomfort, especially for the culprit—this situation is way more uncomfortable for the POC than it is for both of you. Silence is powerful.
6⃣ If it becomes *escalated,* tape them.
So they might not make eye contact with you or thank you.
In the family scenario, the dad could have said "hey, Geminina, this person behind has been waiting patiently. Let's step aside so they can order."
In the barista scenario, the person in front of me could have said, "Hey, I think we arrived first."
In the grocery store, anyone could have said, "There's a fucking person there" because there's really no excuse there.