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Tatiana Mac @tatianatmac
, 11 tweets, 3 min read Read on Twitter
Speaking for *only* myself, this is what I would have wanted in this scenario from ANY of the observing white people in the café, grocery store, restaurant. (In all of these scenarios, I was the *only* patron of color, exacerbating the erasure.)

I hope we can stay in 0⃣. 👇
Disclaimers:

I'm not an expert on how to deal with this stuff either, despite it happening to me every day.

I'm by no means I suggesting that this methodology will be "okay" for all folks of color.

You're taking a risk in doing this, just know that and be okay with that.
0⃣ Don't do it yourself.

0⃣ Make a conscientious effort to see it *always.* I bet you encounter it more often than you see.

0⃣ Call out your white friends first. We have a bigger impact and will be heard by people who already are invested in us and care for us.
1⃣ Address the culprit directly and factually.

"This person arrived first."
"This person was in front of you."

(Also use gender-neutral, non race-based terms when addressing strangers. Avoid "ma'am" or "sir" or other gross condescending words.)
2⃣ Make sure that the person providing service hears what you said to course correct on their end.

Note: They're often not in a position of power, as service industry is very power-shifted to "customer is always right." So, even WP to WP, service person is in less power.
3⃣ Stand in discomfort.

Leaving room for discomfort, especially for the culprit—this situation is way more uncomfortable for the POC than it is for both of you. Silence is powerful.
4⃣ However: Make sure the culprit responds. An apology is ideal. I'd *hope* here that most WP would at least apologize and yield to the POC. If they don't, it gives you an opportunity to say something.
5⃣ If the person retaliates, I believe in deescalation (despite being tired AF and just wanting to be angry and punch Nazis all the damn time). Being calm and factually calling out what the person did wrong. Put yourself between them.

6⃣ If it becomes *escalated,* tape them.
7⃣ Don't make it about you. So, despite the fact that you might naturally want some sort of award for sticking up, that the POC might be very embarrassed about this whole situation and just want it to be over.

So they might not make eye contact with you or thank you.
Specific scenario examples:

In the family scenario, the dad could have said "hey, Geminina, this person behind has been waiting patiently. Let's step aside so they can order."

In the barista scenario, the person in front of me could have said, "Hey, I think we arrived first."
In the barista scenario, the barista (if he had noticed) could have said, "I think these two were here first. I'm going to help them first, then you're next."

In the grocery store, anyone could have said, "There's a fucking person there" because there's really no excuse there.
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