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Thread by @theferocity: "I’m watching season five of Buffy. When she said “you’re beneath me” to Spike, I gasped and almost burst into tears! Ice cold. SPIKE IS COMF […]" #LateBuffyS5 #LateBuffyS6

, 163 tweets, 47 min read
I’m watching season five of Buffy. When she said “you’re beneath me” to Spike, I gasped and almost burst into tears! Ice cold.
SPIKE IS COMFORTING BUFFY. Bitch. I’m wet. #LateBuffyS5
Wait a minute. Tara got a makeover! New hair, new make-up, new clothes. Alright, sis. Glow up. #LateBuffyS5
Is... Spike sneaking into Buffy’s room so he can sniff her cardigans? OH MY GOD. He stole a pair of her panties! SIR. #LateBuffyS5
The actor who played Riley is so damn tall. He looks like a giant standing next to Sarah Michelle Gellar. #LateBuffyS5
RILEY, BRUH. #LateBuffyS5
This snake monster is utterly ridiculous even by the standards of monsters on this show. #LateBuffyS5
Just when I start to get a little bored with this show, it becomes extraordinary again. This quell demon episode! #LateBuffyS5
This season is dark and fascinating. My goodness. #LateBuffyS5
Spike is a messy bitch who lives for the drama. The look Buffy gave him when he tried to use exposing Riley’s addiction to make a move tho... whew. These white people ain’t messing around. #LateBuffyS5
I can’t decide if Riley is trash or not. Like, his entire crisis basically boils down to the “struggle” of being in love with a woman who is stronger than him. 🤔 #LateBuffyS5
DID RILEY SAY “THEY NEEDED ME”?! Bitch. It’s a wrap. Buffy, go home, listen to the first half of “Lemonade” and let the healing begin. Love don’t leave here no more. #LateBuffyS5
W H E W, J E S U S. Riley asking Buffy to hit him was WILD. Take yo punk ass on to South America, sir. #LateBuffyS5
I thought Buffy was gonna let homegirl go free AND THEN SHE STAKED HER FROM BEHIND. #LateBuffyS5
You know shit has gone south when Xander shows up trying to act like a life coach. #LateBuffyS5
LOLOLOLOLOL. Buffy running in her leather jacket to get to Riley before his helicopter takes off is so dramatic. I’m fucking living! #LateBuffyS5
I know it’s a tragic moment for her, but Riley not hearing her screaming or turning around on the helicopter was funny as hell. Dude’s neck didn’t move. #LateBuffyS5
Did Anya just read Buffy into the grave? Yes, the fuck she did. “Maybe it’s her.” WHEW. #LateBuffyS5
Spike has a Buffy... mannequin? Dude keeps finding ways to surprise me. #LateBuffyS5
THE TROLL IS ANYA’S EX-BOYFRIEND?! LOL. What don’t come out in the wash comes out in the rinse. #LateBuffyS5
Spike is so hot. Every once and a while, it’s actually distracting. Those eyebrows alone. #LateBuffyS5
SPIKE AND JOYCE ARE WATCHING “PASSIONS” TOGETHER. #LateBuffyS5
GLORY IS A GOD?! #LateBuffyS5
I don’t know if it’s because I like Anya so much. But I don’t hate Xander anymore? 🤔🤔🤔 #LateBuffyS5
I’d watch an entire spin-off series that’s just Spike, Joyce and Dawn as roommates in the big city. #LateBuffyS5
Poor Dawn. #LateBuffyS5
So, did Dawn ever actually exist? #LateBuffyS5
I LOVE SPIKE SO MUCH. When he isn’t being creepy or terrible, he’s so wonderful and smart. And he has a very high emotional intelligence. #LateBuffyS5
DAWN, YOU IN DANGER, GIRL. #LateBuffyS5
Everyone needs to stop being mean to Spike! He contributes! He cares! #LateBuffyS5
DRUSILLA! #LateBuffyS5
Okay, I’m about to watch “I Was Made To Love You.” Y’all got me excited about this episode so it better bring the drama. I want antics! #LateBuffyS5
Warren, where the fuck art thou? #LateBuffyS5
“Crying is blackmail. Good girlfriends don’t cry.” 👀 #LateBuffyS5
FUUUUCKKKKKKKK. #LateBuffyS5
If I ever see Joss Whedon in the street, I’m kicking his ass. #LateBuffyS5
JUSTICE FOR JOYCE. #LateBuffyS5
THIS IS SO SAD. FUUUUCKKK. #LateBuffyS5
NOOOOOOOOOOOO. #LateBuffyS5
Death is so lonely. #LateBuffyS5
As someone who lost a mother very suddenly, I can tell you first-hand that “The Body” is stunning in all the details it captures about the first few moments when the reality of grief hits. WHEW. #LateBuffyS5
This episode is brutal. I haven’t cried this hard for white people on TV since the secretary died on “The West Wing.” #LateBuffyS5
Well, Anya just ruined me. #LateBuffyS5
Has anyone told Spike about Joyce yet? Dude is gonna be crushed. #LateBuffyS5
And now Tara is ruining me. #LateBuffyS5
I’m worried about Dawn, y’all. She’s been through so much in one damn season! If I was her, I’d need to be sedated by this point. #LateBuffyS5
And right after I said that, a dead dude woke up in the morgue and started walking toward Dawn so... yeah. #LateBuffyS5
Well, I made it through “The Body.” That was excellent. I will never watch that episode again. LOL. Onward, heauxes! #LateBuffyS5
Dawn and this resurrection spell... Girl, this is not a good idea. #LateBuffyS5
Spike and this Buffy robot. #LateBuffyS5
A real kiss at the end of “Intervention.” Relieved to have a lighter / more action packed episode to end the night on. (Spike needs to be in therapy.) #LateBuffyS5
I’m watching “Tough Love.” Willow telling Buffy how to go about disciplining Dawn was... really something. There is giving advice and then there is knowing your lane. #LateBuffyS5
OH LORD, GLORY ROLLED UP ON TARA. We’re off to the races, people! Willow bout to set it off. #LateBuffyS5
I’m so here for Spike as Dawn’s babysitter. I need a see where he helps her with her algebra homework. #LateBuffyS5
SPIKE COMING THROUGH AS THE VOICE OF REASON. Know my pale king! KNOW HIM. #LateBuffyS5
Willow really thought she was gonna come at Glory like... #LateBuffyS5
OOP. THE JIG IS UP. The key tea has been spilled. WHEW. Joss Whedon really put these white people through it. Buffy was so shook she picked up Dawn and tried to make a run for it! LOL. #LateBuffyS5
SPIKE AND BUFFY ANNOUNCE THEIR WORLD TOUR: “ON THE RUN 2.” #LateBuffyS5
Okay, wait. A whole damn army of medieval-looking knights has just been marching around Sunnydale and no one noticed? #LateBuffyS5
“At least things can’t get any crazier.” I don’t know, girl. #LateBuffyS5
Man. These “Game of Thrones” cosplayers are really fucking shit up. #LateBuffyS5
BUFFY CALLED BEN AND TOLD THEM EXACTLY WHERE THEY WERE HIDING. #LateBuffyS5
Spike is always able to see what the other characters struggle to perceive. People rarely listen because they hate him but he be knowing! #LateBuffyS5
Shout out to Anya being the first one to at least suggest to Willow that she might be playing it a little too fast and loose with magic. Seems like no one else has noticed (except Tara before, well, you know.) #LateBuffyS5
In one fell swoop, Buffy made her two worst fears a reality: (1) She will never love a man who isn’t a disaster waiting to happen. (2) She will lose everyone in her family. Damn. I’d need a mental break too. #LateBuffyS5
Season five is so dark. Buffy thought about killing Dawn! Whew. #LateBuffyS5
Every time I think or tweet that this season is so dark, it gets... darker. Sometimes I lowkey don’t trust Joss Whedon for everything he put Buffy through? IDK. Seems cruel. Anyway, time for the season five finale. #LateBuffyS5
GILES, SIR. Don’t even talk about killing dawn. The fuck is wrong with you, my dude?! World gone mad. #LateBuffyS5
ANYA LOSING IT OVER THIS STUFFED RABBIT. LOL. I love her. My demon queen. #LateBuffyS5
OH MY GOD. XANDER, WHAT?! #LateBuffyS5
THIS DAMN SHOW KEEPS THROWING EMOTIONAL CURVEBALLS. I HAVE NOTHING LEFT TO GIVE. #LateBuffyS5
Buffy inviting Spike back into her home. #LateBuffyS5
This plan to take on Buffy is going well... too well. The writer in me doesn’t trust it but I WANT TO BELIEVE THAT HAPPY ENDINGS ARE POSSIBLE. #LateBuffyS5
GO, SPIKE! GO! #LateBuffyS5
Oh shit. Giles is about to... OH SHIT. #LateBuffyS5
Who is this evil little man?! (That’s a rhetorical question. No spoilers, please.) #LateBuffyS5
LORD JESUS. #LateBuffyS5
Everything that can go wrong is go my wrong. FUCK. FUCK. FUCK. FUCK. Please don’t do this to my girl. She’s been through so much. #LateBuffyS5
“Death is your gift.” OH MAN. #LateBuffyS5
She saved the world a lot. FUCK. #LateBuffyS5
I was going to take a break after I finished season five but y’all got me smooth fucked up if you think I’m going to sleep on a cliff hanger like that. Gonna reattach my wig and then it’s on to #LateBuffyS6. HMPH.
Diving into season 6 like Buffy jumping off that damn tower. “LIVE-TWEETING BUFFY IS MY GIFT.” #LateBuffyS6
Me, every time I see Spike fighting a demon with the team: #LateBuffyS6
Oh okay, so Spike’s sexbot is a regular part of the team now? Well, see, we all grieve in our own way... I guess. #LateBuffyS6
Damn. Willow killed Bambi. SMH. #LateBuffyS6
It’s subtle but I find it really touching to see how Tara — who lost a parent when she was young — has stepped up (and becoming more confident) to co-parent Dawn. What a lovely character beat. #LateBuffyS6
BUFFY BACK. #LateBuffyS6
Spike is such a great babysitter. #LateBuffyS6
“Let’s fly, pigeon!” Spike and Dawn riding a motorcycle together to make a get away as demons ransack Sunnydale is extremely my jam. I still haven’t recovered from him calling her “sweet pea” a while back. #LateBuffyS6
Resurrected Buffy and Existential Crisis Dawn are back on top of Glory’s tower. 😭😭😭 #LateBuffyS6
Buffy’s first words this season were “Is this hell?” So, yeah, y’all might be on to something when you say season six is dark than season five. Lucky for you: I’m a messy bitch who lives for the drama. #LateBuffyS6
The actor who plays Spike is SO GOOD at performing those moments when he looks at Buffy and really *sees* her. #LateBuffyS6
DID MY PALE KING SAY “147 DAYS YESTERDAY”? HE’S BEEN COUNTING. #LateBuffyS6
I understand why he’s like this but when Xander is mean and consistently assumes the worst of Spike (when Xander is forever on the thin side of fuckboi trying not to breakthrough) always makes me so angry. The nerve. #LateBuffyS6
Willow is making me so angry. Like, girl, read the room AND read the tea leaves. Everything ain’t about what YOU want. Hmph. #LateBuffyS6
BUFFY WAS IN HEAVEN AND THEY BROUGHT HER BACK TO THE HELLMOUTH. #LateBuffyS6
“Life comes at you fast.” - Buffy #LateBuffyS6
Xander, the fuck you doin’ proposing to Anya if you ain’t ready to be engaged? What kind of fuckboi math are you using?! #LateBuffyS6
Demon Poker Night with kittens instead of chips! LOL. #LateBuffyS6
To be honest, I’m surprised that (unless I haven’t been paying attention) we don’t see Buffy drunk more often. Everything that happened in season five and not once do I remember seeing her “drowning her sorrows.” #LateBuffyS6
Oh, wait. Okay, y’all asked for a warning. I’m about to start the episode that precedes “Once More With Feeling” so I guess that will be happening tonight too. 🚨 #LateBuffyS6
I jump every time the gentlemen callers from “Hush” show up in the opening credits. Every single time. Metal mouthed motherfuckers. #LateBuffyS6
I love how much Anya loves running the store and making money. A former demon queen making money moves. #LateBuffyS6
OMG, it’s @ambertamblyn and a bunch of shifty youths Dawn absolutely should NOT be hanging out with. #LateBuffyS6
OOP. The hot jock is the vampire. I’m convinced Joss Whedon enjoyed punishing Buffy and Dawn for being into hot guys. They’re always beautiful disasters. #LateBuffyS6
“I just want to taste you.” #LateBuffyS6
“No, I’m a rebel. You’re an idiot.” Spike has the best lines. I was made to love him. 😏 #LateBuffyS6
Watching Willow manipulate Tara — lowkey one of my favorite characters — is infuriating. Like, she’s basically drugging her with magic. UGH. #LateBuffyS6
🚨🚨 “Once More, With Feeling” 🚨🚨 #LateBuffyS6
THESE SINGING DEMONS IN THE GRAVEYARD. #LateBuffyS6
Buffy ain’t got time for the random hot guy, she’s got notes to hit. #LateBuffyS6
Willow can sing all she want, I don’t care. I’m fed up with her and her 53% spells. Hmph. #LateBuffyS6
ANYA. Was she singing about bunnies again?! LOL. I love her so much. #LateBuffyS6
“They got the mustard out!” A dry-cleaning anthem. Pay homage! #LateBuffyS6
Why is Tara dressed like a Disney princess? #LateBuffyS6
I love Tara’s voice! OMG. I’d love to hear her sing “Running Up That Hill.” She has the voice for it. #LateBuffyS6
ZOOT SUIT RIOT. #LateBuffyS6
Okay, Anya and this lingerie lewk. Stunt on these mortals, sis. #LateBuffyS6
Now that I’m getting used to the spectacle of the musical episode, I’m starting to notice that all of these lyrics have serrated blades in them. “He hides behind his Buffy.” #LateBuffyS6
Spike is wearing a blood-red shirt. I don’t remember the last time I saw him wearing any color but black. 👀 #LateBuffyS6
Yep. Definitely moaned at Spike’s first sung note. #LateBuffyS6
“Whisper in a dead man’s ear / that doesn’t make it real.” 👀👀👀 #LateBuffyS6
“STOP VISITING MY GRAVE AND LET ME REST IN PEACE.” This song! OMG. #LateBuffyS6
OOP. Looks like Tara is connecting the dots. #LateBuffyS6
Dawn and these dancing marionette motherfuckers is gonna give me nightmares. I hate wooden foreheads. #LateBuffyS6
Oooooooh, this demon is everything. I’m loving his LEWKS, his moves, his his voice. How fun! #LateBuffyS6
Giles singing “I’m standing in the way.” 👀 #LateBuffyS6
Poor Tara. After having her mind manipulated by Glory last season, it’s heartbreaking to see her realize that Willow has manipulated her memory. What a betrayal. #LateBuffyS6
“I hope you dance until you burn.” #LateBuffyS6
“FIRST I’LL KILL HER THEN I’LL SAVE HER.” Did I hear that right?? #LateBuffyS6
YAAAAAAAAAAAAAS! ANYA, TARA AND BUFFY AND THIS CHOREOGRAPHY. #LateBuffyS6
H E A V E N. #LateBuffyS6
YEAH, WILLOW, YOU FUCKED UP. #LateBuffyS6
Xander summoned the demon because... what? #LateBuffyS6
YES, BUFFY. TOUCH SPIKE’S FIRE. #LateBuffyS6
I’m so proud of Tara for keeping it one hundred with Willow. That was a violation. Ain’t no way around it. #LateBuffyS6
(It’s kind of annoying that — knowing I’m experiencing the show in real time — some of y’all insist on foreshadowing. Just let me get there. I know you’re excited. I get it. But trust me to get there. #LateBuffyS6)
WILLOW, WHAT THE FUCK?! #LateBuffyS6
Randy Giles. LOL. #LateBuffyS6
Eh, actually, I’m gonna call it a night. And pack back up with “Tabula Rasa” tomorrow. Sleep well, y’all. #LateBuffyS6
Back to watching “Tabula Rasa.” LOL at Spike and Niles thinking they’re father and son. #LateBuffyS6
Anya and all these bunnies! I’m obsessed with her rabbit-driven narrative arc. Can’t get enough. #LateBuffyS6
Me, watching Giles kiss his “wife” Anya: #LateBuffyS6
*whispers* It creeps me out when Buffy talks in her baby voice. #LateBuffyS6
I’m never here for anyone calling anyone a “tease.” Spike, my problematic pale king, this includes your dead ass. Back down. #LateBuffyS6
“One, Larry is gay. Two, Larry is dead. Three, high school is over.” It makes sense for her character arc but ARGH, it’s frustrating to see how Willow keeps using magic without even considering its consequences. #LateBuffyS6
Willow can’t even use the computer without using magic. Lordt. Yeah, she’s addicted. So many addiction narratives on this show. (Shout out to Riley who was addicted to... everything.) #LateBuffyS6
These three incel wannabe villains are so annoying! #LateBuffyS6
Well, Buffy and Spike are fucking and literally breaking the house down while doing it. I... #LateBuffyS6
OH MY GOD. SPIKE IS NAKED. I’m seeing upper thigh! #LateBuffyS6
“I may be dirt but you’re the one who likes to roll in it.” #LateBuffyS6
SPIKE TWIRLING BUFFY’S PANTIES AROUND HIS FINGER. I’m calling the police. #LateBuffyS6
Ohhhhh, Buffy is so invested in rationalizing her... relationship with Spike she won’t even allow herself to accept that Willow has become addicted to magic. OMG. BUFFY HAS BEEN DICKMATIZED. #LateBuffyS6
I love when an entire narrative arc can be boiled down to “dick will make you slap somebody” because, let’s be honest, it will. #LateBuffyS6
Dang. Willow took Dawn with her to the magical drug den?! Yikes. This is some real Breaking Bad-type shit. #LateBuffyS6
S H O O O O O O O K. #LateBuffyS6
Buffy and Willow both saying “it’s over” when we all know damn well, it ain’t over: #LateBuffyS6
Buffy moaning as Spike reached into the front pocket of her jeans to get his lighter out. This season is very NSFW, y’all. #LateBuffyS6
BUFFY IS INVISIBLE. SPIKE IS HAVING SEX WITH BUFFY. XANDER WALKS IN ON SPIKE FUCKING BUFFY... AND THEY DON’T STOP FUCKING. #LateBuffyS6
INVISIBLE BUFFY IS GIVING SPIKE A BLOWJOB. #LateBuffyS6
Buffy is a mess. How you gonna sleep with someone and then say “if you ever tell anyone about this, I will kill you”? LOL. She stay projecting her reckless decisions. #LateBuffyS6
If only Buffy had watched “Tales From The Crypt,” she’d be onto what’s going on at the Double-Meat Palace a lot faster. #LateBuffyS6
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