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foone @Foone
, 9 tweets, 2 min read Read on Twitter
I've been listening to a bunch of early-90s hiphop recently and the funniest thing about listening to it in 2018 is how often they mention their "beepers"

You can tell I'm a gangsta because I've got a PAGER!
my favorite pager story: When my mom was pregnant with my younger siblings, my dad temporarily got a pager so that he could be called in the hospital, since he was a house painter and wasn't near a phone most of the time. So I guess he was a TEMPORARY GANGSTA for those months?
but my brother was a very late baby so after 2-3 weeks he finally decides to get out of the house and go golfing. he goes to the course with a friend, taking the pager of course. right at the start of the second hole, he gets paged! oh no
but hey, the clubhouse is past the end of the second hole, so he might as well finish up this hole, right? :)
So he finishes, records his score for those two holes, then races home.
this is the kind of abject stupidity in the face of medical emergency that runs in my family, as proven by me driving myself to the hospital during a POSSIBLE HEART ATTACK because it was 11pm and my wife had just gone to sleep and I didn't want to wake her
in my defense, I was pretty sure it wasn't actually a heart attack, because I'd had identical symptoms a week before and it turned out to be "nothing important".
in her defense, I'm a fucking idiot.
in any case, the 90s were a different time.
(the "heart attack" symptoms were biliary colic, aka a gallstone attack. gallstones in your gallbladder temporarily block the bile duct, which causes severe chest pain for some reason. 30mins to a few hours later, it finally passes, and the pain just goes away)
it's one of those fun conditions that gets you sent immediately to the hospital where they quickly do an EKG and see that your heart is fine, so you get to sit in the waiting room for an hour or two since you're clearly Not Dying, you're just in massive pain.
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