Reality: I'm accurately describing a phenomenon in which I am not at fault. Nobody deserves the hate mail I receive, absolutely nobody. Also, I'm not asking people to feel sorry for me. I am raising awareness.
Reality: I have blocked thousands of Twitter accounts. These is not a few bad apples but rather a society-wide phenomenon of permissibility of vile speech against women. We need to confront our demons because we can't outrun them.
Reality: I am attacking with the implicit (and, perhaps, at times the explicit) support of some rather powerful people. When the trolls are largely running things, we ignore them at our peril.
Reality: I am met with hate speech, in large part, because I discuss my scholarship in public forums. Disseminating scholarship matters, and hate speech has become part of that conversation for me.
Reality: That's an old trope, in the vein of 'It was her fault for wearing a short skirt'. If you really think that the answer to women being targeted is for women to change their behavior, well, you're looking at the wrong culprit.
Reality: Yeah, it does, because of the language, the power dynamics, sexism, and many other things. My challenge back - If you think that gender doesn't matter, then stop drawing attention to my gender.