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Kimberley James @KimJames87
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TRANSGENDER FAQs
1. If it isn't a fetish, why are there not as many trans men as trans women?
A: There are as many trans men as trans women. In reality it is essentially a 50/50 split. Some estimates show that amongst the younger generation, the balance is tipped toward FtMs.
2. But there are only two genders, aren't you just a gay man?
A: Sexuality, Gender Identity and Gender Expression are linked but separate. Each is a spectrum, none are binary. A transgender woman can be heterosexual, homosexual, bisexual or pansexual. List not exclusive
3: Isn't it okay to just be a man in a dress?
A: Yes. It is okay. But that isn't what a transgender woman is. A man in a dress is a man with a variant gender expression. He's not gay for being gender-nonconforming. He's not necessarily transgender.
4.1: What makes you think you are a woman? 'Woman' isn't a feeling.
A: No, 'woman' isn't a feeling. But what you identify as a woman is likely a little bit restrictive. The majority of women share similar gender identities, similar gender expressions and sexualities.
4.2: But a Lesbian is still a woman. How are you a woman?
A: Yes, a Lesbian is still a woman. Her gender identity is still 'woman', the other two elements do not affect her validity as a woman. Likewise, a transgender woman has a gender identity in the 'woman' end of the spectrum
5.1: Have you had surgery? You're not a woman if you have a penis.
A: My genital configuration is my business and the business of anyone that I sleep with. If you can't tell whether or not I have a penis by looking at me clothed, surely it is not relevant?
5.2: But you can still use it! You could be a rapist for all I know?
A: Offensive, much? Testosterone blockers kill libido and render penises impotent.
5.3: But not every trans woman takes hormones and T-blockers. Am I not right to be wary?
A: Not every trans person medically transitions, that much is true, but genuine trans people find themselves more at risk prior to HRT. You have every right to be wary. Nobody is denying that
6.1: You are transing kids to extend your cause? Can't you leave them alone?
A: 'Transing' isn't a thing. Most trans people suffer so greatly that we don't want kids to be transgender. But we will support any child that says they are trans.
6.2: By giving them dangerous drugs and surgeries?
A: Nobody under the age of 18 is offered surgery in this country. It doesn't happen. They also don't get given cross-sex hormones. What they do get is puberty blockers
6.3: Aha! So they do get dangerous drugs?
A: No, while there are a lot of rumours about puberty blockers, they are reversible. At the age of 18, the human body still has plenty of time for a full puberty. Effects of puberty limit as you get older, but young desistors are fine
7.1: You are only becoming a woman to trick lesbians! Why can't you leave them alone?
A: I am personally not interested in lesbians. Even if I were, I would only date one consensually.
7.2: It's not transphobic to not want to date a trans woman, is it?
A: This one has some grey area, but mostly no. If you don't find someone attractive, you don't sleep with them. Consent is everything. Your body your rules
7.3: But...
A: No, your body your rules.
7.4: So if I don't want to sleep with a man...?
A: Being called a man is hurtful. I may not conform to your idea of what a woman is, but you don't have to be deliberately hurtful. If I were to ever ask you out, all you have to do is say "I'm flattered, but no thank you"
8.1: The GRA is dangerous for women and girls. Why should it be allowed?
A: What you are referring to is the Self-ID element of the GRA. Not all trans people are convinced that this is the right approach, but it does have its merits.
8.2: But Self-ID will let men abuse women and girls, won't it?
A: No. You have the right to ask anyone that is acting inappropriately to leave a single-sex space, regardless of their whether they are trans or not. Acting in a voyeuristic manner is a crime
8.3: But Men will be free to enter women's prisons, won't they?
A: No. Individual risk assessments are done. Any trans woman deemed a threat to women is placed in the male populace. Nobody is arguing against this.
8.4: But Karen White...?
A: Karen White being able to enter a women's prison and rape inmates is condones by no-one. It is horrific, upsetting and my heart goes out to her victims. She should never have been there. It was the result of a huge failing by many people.
8.5: But it is proof it can happen, isn't it?
A: Yes, but hopefully the prison service has learnt its lesson. Nobody wants to see a repeat of this. Just because you are in prison, doesn't mean you aren't entitled to safety.
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