PEOPLE: "He can't eat babies, that's super illegal."
TRUMP, on TV, eating babies, not even cooking them first: "People are saying that I really am the best baby-eater, folks."
NYT: "Trump Vs. Babies: The Rhetoric On Both Sides Must Stop"
Jeff Flake, 10 seconds later, votes to help him install a series of 4,000 new judges that are very, very pro-babyphagia.
Mike Pence then invites a Baby Chef to say a prayer.
Trump: *eats tons of babies at a rally*
*literal tons of babies*
Twitter user EATLIBERALBABIES98342U5293485823742: "eatin babbies to own the soy cuck npcs
Twitter user TRUMPTRAINDIAPERDAVE78452394638476923645982: "i am def real not robotski"
Trump: *opens a chain of baby-eating restaurants, Ivanka runs it, each baby is branded with the presidential seal, each sale goes toward his 2028 reelection campaign*
Press: "What did you get in return?"
Schumer: "I was supposed to get something in return?"
Trump, at a rally that night: "Folks, folks, I still eat babies, I ate a baby right before I came out here. I eat them like pizza, with a fork and knife."
BABIES: THE OTHER OTHER WHITE MEAT
A newspaper blows in front of them, NYT:
BABY-EATING: IT COULDN'T HAPPEN HERE
It blows away, on the dust, and is gone.