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Ian Millhiser @imillhiser
, 10 tweets, 2 min read Read on Twitter
1) As an Old, I want to tell a story to the Youths about a great hero-- Nancy of the West, Once and Future Speaker, Savior of Social Security.

This is our history, O Ye Progressives. Gather and listen.
2) Many years ago, a darkness fell upon our land. George the Lesser ruled over us with an inarticulate fist. After George felled his rival John the Awkward but Just, the boy king set out to destroy Social Security.
3) O Ye Youths, listen to my tale. Hear my warning of an era of Democratic weakness. Of Blue Dogs and appeasement. It was an age when the just were timid and the evil were bold. When Democrats voted for the fucking Iraq War. When Democratic lips dripped with the words "Third Way"
4) And so it came to pass that George the Lesser, fresh off his victory over his just but awkward foe, declared that Social Security should be turned over to Lehman Brothers and Bear Stearns.
5) Many Democrats were weak. And so they came to their leader, Nancy of the West, and they asked her questions.

"When shall we release our alternative plan?"

"When will we negotiate with the Lesser George?"

"When shall we sell out our elders, and call it 'compromise?'"
6) But Nancy of the West did not waiver. She looked upon these Democrats, in their weakness, and said unto them "Never. Does never work for you?"
7) Seriously, that's what she fucking said. I have receipts.

archive.boston.com/news/nation/wa…
8) And so it came to pass that the hero, Nancy of the West, taught the weakened Democrats the Way of the Spine.

And so it came to pass that she led them to victory. And George the Lesser was vanquished.
9) Think on these words, O Youths. Remember our history as you proclaim our hero too weak, or too old, or too timid to take up her gavel once again.
10) For once we were weak, not because we had to be, but because we chose to be. And it was Nancy Fucking Pelosi who showed us how to be progressives.
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