Hi, Twitter. I know I’ve been quiet today. As you can see, I’m preoccupied with writing something.

I believe in fair warnings, so:
That article originates in this extended Twitter thread of mine that you may (or may not) have already seen -- on my ISIS expertise, and my childhood on the frontlines of all-American Christian terrorism's Abortion Wars in Wichita, Kansas. threadreaderapp.com/thread/1061057…
Writing the full article is taking longer than expected, for some solid, terrifying, and heart-breaking reasons.

The life - and assassination - of Dr. George Tiller is intimately intertwined with both sides of the family into which I was born.
Those religious, ideological, and political fault lines of that Christian terrorism campaign cut across both sides of my birth family, have converged on my own body, and shaped the woman I became.

Going public, by my own name, with all of this... it's heavy.
From pre Roe v. Wade illegal abortions had by militant pro-lifers (ironic, eh) in my own family (oh, and my other family related & employed by Tiller ), later my own rape-induced pregnancy (& abortion) to recounting ISIS' decapitations of my friends... it's taking a bit longer.
Publication will land me squarely in the middle of multiple, intersecting, overlapping storms. Personally. Politically. Maybe even professionally. I know and accept this.

But this is an ethical necessity & a moral obligation. Because, America, we need to talk about "terrorism."
As far as my PTSD "triggers," they pretty much all converge here. And I've already been "warned" about "the consequences." So, it's a lot.

In sum - please be patient. I want (& need) to get this piece right, in the interest of peace (mine & yours). A few more days.

I am morally and ethically committed to what needs to be said here.

This isn't a story about me, but it's unfortunately grounded in personal and professional experience - it's dragging up more emotional turmoil than expected.

So be patient with me. It's coming; I promise.
I'll be off Twitter until this gets finished - inshallah by the weekend at the latest.

If you missed the original thread and want a sneak preview, or the context of my whiny little mini-meltdown here tonight (semi-joke), just scroll up.

Until then, bye - and peace to you all.
Last-minute draft edits, running it by quoted parties for approval, and then passing it over to the editors by the end of the day, inshallah.

Deep. Breaths.
FUUUUUUUUCK. This goes so much deeper than I realized when even I woke up today. My childhood therapist and I are still in touch - she just called me to tell me she was on PP's board during the Abortion Wars, and sued Kansas' AG over his "kiss and tell" law.

Jaw on floor.
After this article is submitted, and job stuff is taken care of - likely years in the future - I'm writing an entire book on this. One week ago, I knew how interconnected my family and life was with Tiller's life and death, but how much? Good God. I wasn't even close.
Goddamn, it’s been a hell of a day.

To put it mildly.
Holy fuck just holy fucking fuck

I cannot wait to have this article out of my hands. Literally.
Waiting on one more person to verify quotes and give approval before handing this off to the editors.

I literally cannot wait to get this out of my hands. I work on a lot of emotionally draining subjects.

But this one has been a beast of everything all at once all over again.
The hits just keep coming. My FB, phone, email are still going: a constant stream of things like these, confidential confessions, cries for help... and that doesn’t even include the ISIS material.

I am so goddamned drained.
Welcome to Wichita.
And exhausted doesn’t even begin. I’m going to sleep, because I don’t know when my final quoted person will get back to me on verification.

I deserve a goddamn nap. Bless the editors for their patience, and pray for my sleep and sanity.

Final verification received. Draft dispatched to the editor.

I have learned a new level of what "drained" feels like.

I will keep you posted on where, and when, the article will appear.

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