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TaLynn Kel is planning 2019 @TaLynnKel
, 17 tweets, 3 min read Read on Twitter
People need to realize that we grew up in a culture that routinely abuses people and has actively created systems around legitimizing that abuse.

We have to realize that we have been abusive. Repeatedly. We grew up being socialized to do that shit.
Some are more abused than others because our social hierarchy said it was not just okay to abuse us, but required to be successful.

And people have bought into this message at every level. EVERY LEVEL.
We have all gaslighted someone. You know why? Because emotionally manipulating someone to get your way is acceptable. Lying is acceptable.
Pretending to be someone likable is REQUIRED to try to minimize harm when you are part of an oppressed group and it's considered to be an acceptable tactic when you are trying to be successful.
We don't operate in realms where respect, trust, and care are seen as positive. Instead, success is defined by how thoroughly you are willing to fuck people over to make any gains.
Our society has made integrity, care, and honest into fucking liabilities because people are constantly looking to exploit people and gain power only to more openly exploit it without repercussion.
So when I see men being accused of sexual misconduct, I don't question it. I've been in situations were men who didn't know my name have felt free to shove their hand down my throat, lick my neck, and then blame me for it cuz I had skin accessible.
I've had my hand shoved down some stranger man's pants because public dancing was considered consent.
I've had men try to convince me that I owed them a blowjob for using gas to hang out with me. Men who assumed that movie night meant more than watching a fucking movie, even though that was the explicit agenda for the evening.
I've received lectures at work accusing me of encouraging men simply because I smiled at them or was remotely friendly. And I've been punished for not smiling enough or being friendly enough.
I've had guys hit on me and then tell me I'm being egotistical when I sought clarity of their interest. And I've had those same men trash talk me for daring to ask if we were dating cuz apparently I wasn't high enough caliber for a mutually respectful relationship.
I've also pressured partners into sex because I thought that was normal. I thought a man not wanting to have sex meant something was wrong with me and I used shame to manipulate the encounter into how I thought it was supposed to look.
I've had to learn that romantic relationships do not equal constant sex and that sex that isn't enthusiastic isn't actually fun. I don't want to fuck or be fucked out of obligation.
That shit isn't fun for anyone and if a coerced "yes" gets you off, get therapy and find someone who is into that type of role play cuz that's rape.

We are in an age where the opportunity to learn about toxic and abusive behavior is literally at our fingertips.
We carry around devices that give us access to tools that help us see our fuckery and fix that shit.

All you have to do i listen, reflect honestly, and give a fuck.
Cuz once you see the ways you've harmed other people, once you are aware of the ways you've been harmed, you either embrace the monster you are or you work to kill that shit and rejoin humanity.
Cuz right now, our society is a bunch of monsters pretending to be human and you gotta want to change some fundamental shit about yourself to actually claim that humanity you pretend you have.
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