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Jillian Grace @JillFlusk
, 13 tweets, 3 min read Read on Twitter
If you have an issue and want to talk about it, that's fine. I am 100% here for it!

However, if you are yelling and calling my wife and I names within a minute, you didn't want to talk. You wanted to put me in line. That's #abuse.
Me having been cautious with you, when you have a history of doing this, isn't a betrayal. Me refusing to put up with it anymore isn't a betrayal.

Refusing to let you hurt and control me isn't a betrayal. Even if you were used to it working on me.
"You did change when you came out as trans after all!" Yeah, I guess I did. I've started to value myself. If that upsets you, that's a you problem.

"You're everything wrong with the trans movement!" Look, if you think not wanting to be yelled at all the time is bad, get help.
I have a history of being abused. Therefore, I've had very low self esteem and a desperate need to be accepted. For me, that's led me through cycles of being abused, or at least being treated badly, in similar ways by a series of people.
A different person: "I don't even know how your wife stands you, much less loves you. You're do difficult and hard to even spend time with." *proceeds to guilt trip me over not having the $ to visit, refuses commit to using my name and pronouns, calls me unlovable some more*
Add in on top of that a history of worse put downs, yelling at me, throwing things, hitting me, (to the point of injury!) outing me (as bi) when I wasn't ready... No, I don't think you're a good person, much less a safe one. And I don't want to talk to you anymore.
To the person who I had cut out of my life before I even came out, because of your anger and violence and toxicity: You kidding? The breaking point for us was a trans rights bill being passed, you were so angry over it. No, go away
"Have fun being all alone and sad!"

You know what? Nothing at all made me feel more alone or sad than trying so desperately to appease you, and people like you, and still never knowing when the other shoe would drop.
I was constantly sad, and disoriented. I never knew when the other shoe would drop. Every time things were going well, I got more afraid because I was getting ready for the crash. Right to the bitter end, it never failed.
Now though? I am not.

You said I'd regret it the next day, but I woke up this morning feeling light and free. You see, I have a wonderful wife who loves and supports me. I have other friends who love and support me.
This isn't really about coming out. What this is, is despite your years of telling me otherwise, I've discovered that I can not only be myself, but I am loved for it! Not despite it!
#sorrynotsorry that I don't miss walking on eggshells to earn whatever scraps of love and kindness you deign to toss my way!
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