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Baphomet is an entry level fuck demon, sorry to tell you
Now Belphegor, that's a tough demon to love
If you want to fuck Beelzebub, that's basically just fucking a big tiddy anime girl with horns. It's basically the same.
If your parents were to give you the speech about "yeah i fooled around with fucking demons for a few years in college, i'm totally hip" they would be talking about fucking behemoth
Bael is the demon that a Suburban couple who read about demon fucking in Redbook and decided to get into it to add some zest to their love life would choose
Astaroth is the demon fucking equivalent of Mormon bubble porn
Asmodeus is demon fucking for screenwriters who write police procedurals where they indicate that a psycho serial killer is beyond the pale by giving him a foot fetish
caacrinolaas is like reading Playboy for the articles
look at adremelech, the absolute fucking normie
andras is demon fucking for couples who actually put porno movies on the TV when they fuck
Flaga is the demon fucking equivalent of doing a google search for "boobs"
The couple who ironically goes to the sex club and then go home and each one masturbates by themselves in separate bathrooms is down with Orobas
When missionary is getting old but spooning is too spicy, try paiman
Down to sniff some clean, freshly-laundered panties? then marchochias is your guy
ronwe is like a porno where a cheerleader gives the star quarterback a blowjob in the lockerroom
stolas is like dressing up like a naughty nurse and making puns about injections
rahouart is like lighting a whole bunch of candles and doing the trail of rose petals thing.
if you're thirsty for a demon named LEONARD, then i don't think i should even be required to come up for a joke about how vanilla you are.
buer is like calling your partner "big boy" during your foreplay banter
bartabas is like jerking off to mom's paused jazzercise tape
liking abigor is like being an angry dad who visits prostitutes to complain about how his wife is holding him back
Amduscia is for people take showers after they masturbate
Agares is for guys who see "barely 18" as a selling point when making porn decisions
Volac is like when 2 catholic school girls get detention at the same time
Liking Ipos is like when a guy says Asian women are "demure"
When the pixel ladies in Leisure Suit Larry games get you too hot and bothered, try Shax instead
Belial is for women who describe themselves as a "sex witch" or a "goddess of the bedroom"
Aamon is like guys who say on their dating profiles that "the brain is the sexiest part"
Liking Gomory is like when you tell a stranger on the internet with whom you've only communicated via text "i know you're beautiful, sweety"
Pruflas is for couples in 24/7 master/slave Gor roleplaying relationships
If you like Aim, you are a 35 year old man named Gary, your previous girlfriends didn't understand you, you're currently in a relationship with a high school senior, and you're a member of a Disney Gang.
Deumus fans write erotic fanfiction about Tifa Lockhart
Have you ever considered the wildest, most crazy, out there, mind-blowingest sex idea ever, by which I mean 2 girls kissing? Then you probably like Eligios.
Liking Mammon is like crying if your wife touches your butt
now that we've established that the entire lesser key of soloman is boring garbage for normies, what is the true top-tier demon for discerning demon fuck connoisseurs of good taste, you ask?
MOTHER FUCKING CAIM, BITCHES. Look at this suave son of a bitch.
look at his cool ass belt <3
if you like the thread, feel free to follow the account! Or check out my other funny comics & horror text game works at guttersnipecomic.com and bitterkarella.itch.io
oh also, just so new followers are aware, black lives matter, trans people are valid, no concern trolling fat people about their health, and comicsgate is stupid.
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