"MY BLACK FRIEND"
I hope y'all are ready, bc this is a THREAD, HUNTY.
Let's start off slowly...
There are ACQUAINTANCES, ASSOCIATES, COLLEAGUES, COHORTS, & FRIENDS.
It's rather PERPLEXING, IRKSOME, but sometimes FLAT-OUT HILARIOUS to POC that these categories are oftentimes mixed up by nonPOC.
Most of the time, we don't know.
Acquaintance: someone you've only just been introduced to, or someone you've had a brief interaction with- you at least recognize them
Examples: networking, running into the same person in different places
NOT CHO FRIEND 🤣😂
ASSOCIATE: someone with whom you share common ground with on a few levels
Examples: same hobbies, kids are friends/@ same school or activities, same parties
Can LEAD TO BECOMING FRIENDS, but NOT AUTOMATICALLY YO FRIEND
COLLEAGUES: the people that you WORK WITH.
DASSIT- OUTSIDE of work, you don't know or GAF about them unless it's MAJOR.
Examples:Chad in IT, Becky from Accounting, LaShaun from the ___Branch
Hate to break it to you but, NOT CHO FRIEND, CHIEF
COHORTS: you & them have been THROUGH SOMETHING BIG, THAT HAS FORMED A BOND, usually FOR LIFE. You'd DIE for them, but you may not necessarily LIKE they azz
Examples: Military, Greek Orgs, Survivors of Tragedy, Grew Up Together
STILL, NACHO FRIEND
Now on to FRIENDS:
That's YOUR GIRL/BOY/TEAM/SQUAD/CREW.
Sometimes you're closer to THEM than your OWN FAMILY.
THEY LOVE YOU & HAVE YOUR MF BACK.
THEY WILL TELL YOU THE TRUTH, EVEN IF IT HURTS, & LIFT YOU UP!
THAT'S YOUR FRIEND!!
Now that's hopefully cleared up, & YES there are exceptions (🙄), let's move into WHY, this "My Black Friend" shit gotta STAWP:
If I'm your acquaintance, associate, colleague, or cohort, YOU CANNOT CLAIM THAT I AM YOUR MF FRIEND.
I. AM. NOT.
AND this shit only happens when a nonPOC has done some fÜcked up, RACIST AF BULLSWANKY.
WHICH IS FÜCKED UP AS WELL.
You NEVER HEAR, about "My Black Friend___" in REGULAR ASSED, LACKADAY, REGULAR, SCHMEGULAR LIFE.
Using a relationship, regardless of its nature, as an excuse or an "out" for YOUR UGLY BEHAVIOR is really FOUL.
Especially if the other person HAS NO IDEA THAT YOU HAVE USED THEM LIKE THAT.
LaShaun HAS NOTHING TO DO WITH YOUR FÜCK UP, but you've pulled a "Lynn Patton"
Most POC ARE VERY PARTICULAR about WHO they CALL "A FRIEND" FOR THIS VERY REASON.
It's been done for far too long, by far too many, ALL WITHOUT OUR KNOWLEDGE OR PERMISSION.
VERY RARELY to we utter "My Wyte Friend___" bc WE KNOW HOW THAT SHIT FEELS.
Maybe this has never been pointed out to you.
We gloss over a lot of shit just to keep from going crazy.
Maybe you do it so much, you don't realize that what YOU believe is "open heartedness" & "friendly" is actually some EPIC LEVEL PRIVILEGE.
Either way WE'RE TIRED
If I was YOUR ACTUAL BLACK FRIEND, WHY would you ADD to the ongoing FUCKERIZATION I have to DEAL WITH ALL THE MF TIME?!
FOR YOUR BENEFIT?!
SEE?! I'M NOT YOUR MF FRIEND!
I want to also point out that is NOT on US to change your presumptions.
We didn't cause it, and like I said, probably don't know you did that shit, so WHY is it on US to get YOU together?!
This ENTIRE #BHM, we've been your handy excuses, your "props" as it were.
YUP, & ENOUGH IS ENOUGH.
GLOVES OFF, bc the PROPS are walking off the stage, & you NOW KNOW