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One of my favorite things is seeing someone very intermittently - maybe 10 sessions and then nothing for 3 years, and then 5 sessions, and then twice a yesr, and then 5 more sessions two years later-
You really watch how people transform their lives - how much we change over time with age and patience and maturity. How therapy can serve as the smallest touchpoint over the course of a life that can heal and evolve and reorganize itself.

A profound bearing witness.
You realize how much people just grow on their own, without therapeutic intervention at all - just a momentary shelter or contemplation space at the crossroads.
And its always important to remember and to see- that people transform their lives and re-shape their identities ALL THE TIME - often on their own without therapy.

We have so many narratives about how people “never change” without getting therapy and I don’t think its so.
This is the existentialist in me: we are nothing, no thing, no fixed thing. We are alwatin flux, always capable of being changed and changjng - sonetimes even quite radically.

I’ve seen so many people I’ve known as one cluster of characteristics become, unrecognizably another.
Sometimes people shed skin and identities abd ways of being and stages of life so incrementally that you cant recognize the shifts at all unless you have large breaks between contact and can track their unfolding.

Always In.
I never believe that therapy is the only way people can heal or find their strength or change their lives.

It might help some people, somewhat, some more than others.

LIFE is what changes us.
Bereavement & cancer (in my life they are mixed together) changed my world view as much as psychotherapy ever did. And mostly processed on my own, because this is shit you mostly have to face alone psychologically.

The people “ahead” of me were gone.
There are spaces where therapy cannot offer any guidance at all. But sometimes just company, a little less alienating than most.
There is not some special elite group of magic, healing, wise folk who can change your life for you.
No clergy, no psychotherapists, no intuitive healers who can “fix” anything for you.

They can mostly just try to stay connected.
Just broken/breakable human beings who are trying to support other broken/ breakable human beings with a little extra practice than others at doing so.
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