Thread by @ChuckWendig

psst

guys

GUYS

PSST

the coolest thing just happened

Finally saw the shed fox! She was outside in the woods before I left the house this morning -->

I hadn't seen her all winter -- she has a den like, 20 feet behind the writer's shed, caddy-corner, and I'd seen her prints, but no fox. I'd seen a much darker fox around -- really moving fast, no photos. But not the one from years previous.

(As I continue to be very proud of this photo, I'll show it again: he she is from last year, January.)

flickr.com/photos/terribl…

And I was like, AWW, YAY, she's still around, and I got to see her before the year is out. That's nice.

But then --

It was some Oprah shit, because YOU GET A FOX KIT, AND YOU GET A FOX KIT

LI'L FOX PUPPIES. Playing around! Tumbling and chasing each other. Saw two for sure, kinda thought there was a third one there.

(Apologies for the bad photos -- used the zoom lens but it was both through a window and throw brush.)

Then -- AND THEN -- a second fox showed up! The darker fox that I'd seen before -- must be the Poppa Fox. (I believe the terms are "dog" and "vixen" --?)

They posed very nicely on the rock for me.

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And he groomed her for a while, which she seemed to very much enjoy.

flickr.com/photos/terribl…

But they always kept a vigilant eye on their kids -->

I MEAN LOOK AT THAT LITTLE FUZZY BUTT

Suuuuuper terrible photo but here two of the kits are playing and tumbling around -->

Then me and my family stopped watching their family and we had breakfast. When I came back out, I didn't see them at first -- but did startle foxdad, who hurried off. Once in the shed, I caught sight of her again out the shed window.

And finally, I caught glimpse of her ONE more time a few moments later -- and she had a meal in her mouth. Not sure what. Looked furry more than feathery, so I'm thinking rabbit?

ANYWAY, so endeth this FOX TALE. This is the only fox news I will abide. And a good reminder that the world is full of awesome creatures and we need to share it with them and protect it for them, THE END.

(Oh just to contextually prequelize this -- I've been seeing the shed fox since 2017)

flickr.com/photos/terribl…

Morning update: foxes were out again this morning! Harder to see -- the vixen and the dog fox (Mom and Dad) weren't together. He's out hunting (saw him half-heartedly go after a squirrel like, ehh, fuck it), but caught a glimpse of the kits.

Pics from this morning -- they're not super great but yay foxes!

Update: yesterday, heavy rains, no foxes seen.

Today?

They were out this morning for a good solid hour, playing -- Mom and Dad subbed in and out, and played with the kits. Did the mouse pounce and tumbled around and snuck up on one another. Then they came out around noon again (!) when we were trying to hide Easter Eggs, oops.

PLAY WITH ME, DAD, RAAAR I'M A WOLF

You're a fox.

I'M A WOLF FOR NOW SHUT UP

Fox teeth are a helluva thing -->

Can actually see three of the kits here -->

Blurry, but heckin' adorbs

I thought my birthday would pass SANS FOX, but then I got into the writing shed and oh hello

flickr.com/photos/terribl…

The kits are out back too -- but I can't really see them well, as they're nosing around the really tall grass. Mostly I just see:

*grass shake*

*faint shadow of fuzzy butt, like a shark, but cuter*

Update:

And, taken on Sunday, please to enjoy the ZEN OF FOXES.

flickr.com/photos/terribl…

Was outside trying to snap a pic of an Eastern phoebe (they've been very shy this year) aaaaaand I think I interrupted feeding time at the raptor paddock.

UPDATE:

Entirely possible I have become Tony Soprano with the ducks. What will I do when these foxes leave? I'm in my early 40s too oh god WILL IT FORM IN ME A CLOT OF EXISTENTIAL DREAD

oh well!

ANYWAY I SAW THE FOXES AGAIN

They were out in the evening yesterday and this morning -- here's the two parents and one of the kits. Not a great shot, but you get the idea. Soon as the kit came over it was like MOM DAD IT'S TIME FOR BED STOP CANOODLING and they all went back in the den after this nose boop

BUT! Before that, both mom and dead separately came over ONTO OUR FRONT LAWN -- they were hunting something. Mom did a mouse pounce, I thought she had a mouse (or mole/vole) -- but she left it. Dad came over separately and investigated, too, but also didn't take any prey away.

To give a sense of the sheer bevy of gorgeous photos (as-yet-unprocessed) from this:

They did a lot of canoodling, too, before KIT INTERRUPTION. (Every parent knows that drill, I expect.)

Again, not a great shot, but I did catch that mouse pounce --

Before coming out to the shed I did see one of them (her, I think) down below the rocks, a bit out of sight, chomping down on something. (Also, my son figured out the um, gorier photo from yesterday was almost certainly a bird. You can see the feathers and wing.)

Processed one of the photos. Very photogenic, these foxes. #newphoto flickr.com/photos/terribl…

morning update: double floof

play with me play with me play with me playwithmeplaywithme play play play dad dad dad DAD DAD dad DAAAAD PLAY DAD AHHHHH

Mission: accomplished. (Seriously, two kits and the two parents were chasing each other around like they found some kind of SECRET FOREST COCAINE. Hard to get shots they were whipping and bounding so fast.)

"yeah I'm tough like dad too I can make the tough dad face grr grrrr"

"Honey, look. There's a hairless monkey man in the house-shaped cage taking our photo."

(They looked up at the house when one of our dogs barked at basically nothing, because our dogs bark at nothing all the time. Ghosts, maybe.)

"CHAOS REIGNS"

(or maybe the classic, "HAIL HYDRA")

Couple processed shots from the camera -- first is a still from Zootopia 2:

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And this one I took this morning -->

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A note that I'm compiling all the FANCIER fox shots -- photos with which I'm happy, that get some Lightroom treatment -- in this album at Flickr:

flickr.com/photos/terribl…

LUNCHTIME FOX & FRIENDS UPDATE

dubious fox is dubious

the end

Update: dang, I have encountered this fox, the vixen, a handful of times today — like, not through a window, but while outside. She and the kits have been out all day. To her credit she isn’t super freaked out by me? She’s wary (good!) but not ready to move the den, it seems.

UPDATE: raining, no foxes this morning.

WOE

but --

I saw them yesterday afternoon, so

LOOKIT THAT FUZZY FACE

AND THAT FUZZY BUTT

IMMA STALK YOU

IMMA EAT DIS STICK

IMMA SMELL SOME SMELLS

RAR

GRR

RAR

also, awful photo but -- caught one trying out the mouse pounce

in lower left corner of photo, you can't see but, one of the kit siblings is hiding, thinking of ambushing the one that is juuuust about to jump on its face

Also, processed shot, because even foxes know to stop and smell the flowers once in a while -->

flickr.com/photos/terribl…

GRR update -- called police because neighbor's fuckhead rottweiler was noodling around the fox den. Those dogs are always on our property. Sigh. Don't think they disturbed anything, at least. Goddamnit.

Update! Officer came, nice fella (used to play D&D!), is going over to neighbors now to put the fear of John Q. Law into them about their goddamn dogs.

Morning update pupdate: saw FOX MOM and one of the kits, so they haven’t abandoned the den due to the dog yesterday — but boy is the Ladyfox wary. She’s doing agitated circuits (in between playing with the kit). Lotta furtive movements and looking in every direction.

Certainly possible I’m overanalyzing, obviously — I’m no expert on foxes. FOXPERT? Whatever.

Anyway! In other news, THE KIT FOUGHT A PIECE OF GRASS. The pup kept battling a long piece of dry grass blowing in the wind. As the saying goes: cat software installed into dog hardware.

PUPDATE: THERE ARE FOUR KITS, NOT THREE

(Sorry for extra bad pics — I snapped a shot with my phone of the pic still on the camera. Will get them processed tomorrow.)

The kits are playing hard tonight. They encountered a deer, too — shots of that and story to come.

This is definitely a baby goat, not a smol fox. I'm sure of it.

ANYWAY -- the tale of the fox and the deer. The kits, as noted, played hard last night, and suddenly most of them ran away and one of the SMOL FOXES went to the edge of the rock, staring at something intensely.

So I went to another window where I could get a better view and -- ohhh.

The deer warily passed -- but the one kit set up below the rock, to serve as some kind of audience, or GUARDIAN OF THE DEN or some shit.

Very hard to make out the kit in this shot -- see second image for where it is.

I dunno if the kit was like, YEAH HEY BIG MISTER DEER, YOU CAN PASS, MY DAD SAID IT'S OKAY or if the kit was like WOAH THERE'S A BIG WEIRD FOX OUT HERE I GOTTA KEEP AN EYE ON THIS HEY IS SHE POOPIN DON'T POOP HERE THIS IS OUR POOPGROUND BUDDY

Then the DADFOX showed up and was like, whatever. Meanwhile, a second deer started to pass through and made a face like, "What the fuck is that thing."

The deer hurried on like it had been stung in the ass by a bee, but the fox was like, "Ennh, whatever, move along, you scruffy weed-muncher."

AAAAANYWAY, the kits were high energy last night -- presumably due to a day of rain and high winds. So they were out in full-force. Here are some pictures!*

*includes one (1) "hover fox"

that
little
goddamn
FACE
look at it
LOOK AT IT
behold the VULPINE JOY
the PURE FOREST INNOCENCE
AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH

And as noted, there are definitely four kits, and if I'm being honest, there MAY be five --

You can see the MOMFOX, sorta, and I'm pretty sure another PUPPYFOX is down there with her? We shall see.

Really easy to see some of their orangey-red fox color coming in -->

This morning, MOMFOX came out of the den, loped to the flat rock (the rock you see in most of the shots, as they love that goddamn rock) and just fell asleep for like, 30 minutes. PURE PARENT EXHAUSTION. I suspect many can relate.

VITAL FOX UPDATE: the kits have breached perimeter

repeat THE KITS HAVE BREACHED THE PERIMETER

(three kits went to the door of the writer’s shed — I’m not in it right now, but I watched them from the house)

(one gnawed on the shed, then wriggled underneath it, the little ding-dong — thankfully wriggled back out a minute later, but seemed immediately bewildered, as its siblings had already gone)

(pics in the morning)

As promised, morning pupdate:

FOX KIT AT THE PERIMETER

THEY HAVE THE SHED

REPEAT:

THEY HAVE TAKEN THE WRITER'S SHED

They wandered the frame of the shed, and eventually one fell off, like an adorable ding-dong, and then another pounced on that one. (No photos of those, but you can see two, then three, up there.)

Then this little ADORABLE PACKAGE OF WOODLAND GOODNESS got all brave.

Look at those eyes! They contain magic! Or contact lenses! Do foxes use contact lenses? I don't know! I'm not a foxologist!

MY NAYM IS FOX
SMOL IS MY HEAD
I SNEAK ATTAC
THE RITER SHED

Then Professor Wigglebutt here wriggles his ass UNDER the shed, at which point I was like, welps, guess I'm going to have to figure out how to extract a goddamn baby fox from under my shedquarters --

But he (she?) popped his ass back out from underneath a minute or so later, when all the siblings had gone, leaving him with a moment of existential adorableness -- like a toddler lost in Wal-Mart, just looking around like, "WHERE IS EVERYONE WHAT WORLD IS THIS WHO AM I AHHHH."

One more FANCY FOX SHOT for the FLICKRs, and then I'm off to write this middle-grade book -- behold, one of the fox kit parents. Just chilling on our yard because, why the hell not. #newphoto

flickr.com/photos/terribl…

EVENING PUPDATE: Foxmom procured dead thing; kits stole it from her, then from each other as if it were a toy. Kits went nuts chasing each other 100mph. Roved farther to the north of the den. Also chased each other around my shed and tried to get in the door. ASPIRING WRITERFOXES

Pics (maybe, if they don’t suck!) in the morning.

MORNING PUPDATE: *boop*

HI IS DIS THE RITER SHED WHERE RITER MONKEY RITES THE BOOKS

I HAV IDEA FOR BOOK ABOUT TINY BABY SMOL TINY FOXFRANDS

YOU RITE IT

WE SPLIT PROFITS

They're definitely getting braver, straying farther from the den -- going all the way around the writer shed, doing laps, wrestling by the front door:

You can see here is a new area for them -- this one north of the den, about 30-40 feet from what was formerly (I believe) their "playpen border." (Also sorry for crappy photos -- this was closing in on 7pm, so snaps are extra grainy.)

WRASSLEMANIA: FOREST FOX EDITION

One of the parents, and the kits --

And finally -- BUSTED. One of the fox parents (the Foxdad, I think?) saw me, watched me for a good minute or two through the window, and then wrangled up the pups and went into the den. (They were out again like, 10 minutes later, but too dark by then.)

flickr.com/photos/terribl…

MIDDAY PUPDATE: the kits are going batshit just outside my shed, while I'm in it. More updates soon!

AHH THAT FACE THAT LITTLE FOX FACE I WANNA BE ITS FRIEND ITS MENTOR ITS WEIRD FOREST UNCLE I WANNA SMOOSH IT AND SCRITCH IT AND MAYBE JUGGLE A COUPLE OF THEM WHAT SHUT UP THAT'S OKAY BABY FOXES LIKE TO BE JUGGLED THAT'S JUST SCIENCE, DON'T YOU JUDGE ME

flickr.com/photos/terribl…

This one is straight up eating a bloody nugget of bone. No idea what that belongs to. Any BONEOLOGISTS out there wait is a "boneologist" some kind of sex expert, that's different, oh no

A couple of the kits just curled up out back and went to sleep while Momfox went off to hunt. (Or get some much-needed "me" time, I dunno. Those kits look exhausting.)

Also, as a firm head's up, anyone who rolls up in here to tell me they shoot foxes, I'll block you so hard your kids won't even be able to see you.

IMMA EAT THIS TREE

MOM I GOT IT I DID IT I KILLED A TREE

I AM A GREAT HUNTER LIKE THE FOXES BEFORE ME

No idea what's in Momfox's mouth here -- leaves and bones?

Update? Kits must’ve definitely been out FRONT of the shed too because they left me uhhh

a present?

I'm guessing it's either

a) some kind of forest magic gauntlet of power

or

b) one of the kits fought and slayed some kind of nightmarish SLASHER KILLER in the woods and has now given me this glove as a trophy

(to clarify, it was not there when I went into the shed this morning)

Also if you wanna hear the little foxes, I got video. Watch to end for bonus MOMFOX appearance, checking on all the goddamn ruckus

also!

From yesterday -- Fox & Kit! Momfox and babyfox.

flickr.com/photos/terribl…

it's obvious we all need a fox today, so here, as prescribed from the fox doctor, one (1) baby fox, aka a fox kit, or fox puppy

actually there are two there, shut up

Spotted not far from the glove — what I assume are cardinal feathers. Fox kill, or hawk kill? (We have a pair of redtaileds that hang out here.)

Good video? Nope! But hey the kits are out back playing. Hard to get a bead on them as it’s cloudy and they’re FAST.

*david lee roth voice*

might as well

JUMP

Took a walk with Snoobug and we, uhh, had an audience?

No photos, but one of the kits is TEARING ASS across our front lawn. A little shadow sprinting gleefully about.

MORNING PUPDATE:

THE PUPS HAVE INFILTRATED HOME BASE

REPEAT: THE PUPS HAVE INFILTRATED HOME BASE

WE HUMANS ARE COMPROMISED

THIS IS THE FOXES’ WORLD, NOW

So, the pup came up to the house, as you can see. And one problem was, we hadn't seen the parents for a while. Which made me worry that the kits were roving farther and farther from the den, but without any supervision.

(This is clearly the feeling of all parents when their kits -- er, children -- grow up.)

But I have been worrying because you know, we live in a semi-rural area. We have YOKELS WITH GUNS and they'll shoot any fox they see, because they see them as pest predators.

So I was staring out into the woods, looking for one of the parents --

WHEN THE FOX DAD WANDERS RIGHT BY THE DAMN WINDOW. Like, right out on the inside of the flower bed, next to the porch. Just doo-doo-floo-dee-doo, out for a stroll. I figured he was hunting. And then...

THE FOXES HAVE TAKEN EASTER NOW. THE BUNNY IS NO MORE. THE FOXES DELIVER THE COLORFUL EGGS NOW. ALL OUR HUMAN HOLIDAYS BELONG TO THEM.

flickr.com/photos/terribl…

(And before anybody says it, that isn't a robin egg -- it is literally an Easter egg. We had some to get rid of so they ended up in our one compost area, which Mister Fox here apparently raided.)

Which I guess amuses Mister Fox greatly.

flickr.com/photos/terribl…

It's been quite the morning here at what was once the WENDIGHAUS but is clearly now just FOXWORLD. I write books for them, now. Not for you. For them.

More pics soon. But I gotta go pick up my car and pay them a thousand dollars because cars are bullshit and money is bullshit.

UPDATE: I have returned to the shed to discover that the kits are trying to tunnel their way into it. I soon may be taken into their den.

Also one has left me this gift. Or perhaps a warning. I do not speak their complex language of HEXES and BOONS.

when you tweet a tweet that nobody else seems to like, but you like it anyway

Some more FOX PICS from this morn:

JOHN DOE HAS THE UPPER HAND wait I mean the foxes have the front porch

The fox tales of this morning (with pictures shortly): my wife saw two kits wriggle out from under my shed and then they were quiet for about 45 minutes. But then --

Dad came out and snoozed on a rock for a little while. Eventually three kits mobbed him, they played -- also went farther afield than usual, almost down to the road (!) -- thankfully it's a quiet back road, but just the same, eeek. But they came back up.

You can see them tusslin' a little here in these regrettably not-good photos -->

Then most of the kits went inside, but one stayed out with FOXDAD -- and got some one-on-one grooming attention from pops:

FOXDAD then went down in front of the shed -- alone -- to I assume go hunting, as he usually does, but...

Someone wanted to tag along.

So there was some more grooming on our driveway:

One of the kits snuck up on (?) my writing shed and perhaps dreamed of being a writer. Or dreamed of biting me to dissuade me from publishing their intellectual property without their consent?

But then FOXDAD called! And FOXDAD went hunting.

And (!!) the kit went with him. First time I've seen a kit go out with the parent well away from the den. They disappeared in the woods. Guess it's TAKE YOUR KIT TO WORK day.

After that, we looked out and saw another one on our front porch (!), nooding around our side flowerbeds -- he grabbed something (photos are pretty worthless) and toodled off with it. THE END. For now!

Oh damn I think it is. I think it's a baby bunny.

https://twitter.com/amiasmatics/status/1124288388385923072

I mean, there... were baby bunnies on that side of the house...

WELL, nature red in tooth and claw!

Couple quick processed shots -- here, as you can see, I've been spotted. The fox stared at me in the window for a good minute. Didn't actually flee, so that was nice. The foxes are definitely comfortable here.

flickr.com/photos/terribl…

Aaaand here's FOXMOM just out back the shed from earlier in the week:

flickr.com/photos/terribl…

holy shit a fox just knocked on my shed door

this is my chance to join the foxen

this is happening right now

WELCOME TO FOXWORLD

Never thought I'd be live-tweeting foxes, but here we are. I literally discovered the foxes by one pawing/scratching at my door. (I didn't open it.) I saw fox babies right out front, then FOX PARENT snoozling in our flowerbeds (!) and then all four kits came out and chaos reigns.

Apparently while I was filming this, my wife was filming one or two on our front porch. I WANT TO JOIN YOU, FOXEN. LET ME BE YOUR WEIRD FOREST UNCLE. SHOW ME THE WAY BETWEEN WORLDS. I WILL IN RETURN SHOW YOU WHERE THE BABY RABBITS SLEEP sorry bunnies but I got priorities

OK. They have either gone back to the den or they're on the other side of it. That was some Mutual of Omaha Wild Kingdom shit right there.

I got a ton of DSLR shots too, and honestly some of them are really, really whoadang. I'll maybe get cracking on some of those because YOINKS.

foxes foxes foxes foxes foxes foxes

WOOOOOOOO I'M ALL JUMPED UP ON THAT BABY FOX ENERGY BOY

JUST HIGH ON NATURE

this was the parent fox for most of the time, btw

that is right by our goddamn house, so somebody's getting real cozy

at this point I'm gonna wake up tomorrow morning and find one going through my underwear drawer while the kits eat the Cheezits out of our pantry

I mean I haven't even run this through Lightroom yet but JESUS CHRIST NATURE IS SO FUCKING PURE IT JUST FILLS MY HEART WITH LIGHT AND SUGAR AND FOX ENERGY guys I think nature is just nature's cocaine because I'm really excited right now

I MEAN GODDAMNIT

THE WORLD ISN'T ALL BAD, EVERYONE

FOXES ARE GOOD PEOPLE

update -- processed some shots ooooh

flickr.com/photos/terribl…

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ahhhh THAT FACE

SO CUTE

BUT ALSO A WHIFF OF THE PREDATORY

I WANNA SNUGGLE IT AND THEN TRAIN IT TO TEAR THE THROAT OUT OF MY ENEMIES

flickr.com/photos/terribl…

Not sure I posted this video earlier so, HERE, HAVE SOME.

Listen I’m sorry this has turned into NATURE TIME WITH YOUR WEIRD FOREST UNCLE but the foxes make me post this stuff

Morning pupdate: FOXDAD slumbered on a log after a night of heavy rains; two kits kept pouncing on him to wake up (a common parental and pet-owner feeling). Eventually he went off to hunt; one kit now slumbers in his place, curled up upon itself like a like fox-shaped poop plop.

Oh! And here is video from my wife’s POV — after the fox’s gamboled about the shedquarters they came to the house. One first —

And then PUPPYCAT brought REINFORCEMENTS. (Keen eyes will spy a third kit here too.)

Morning pupdate: no pups this morning (it's been raining like, non-stop), but from yesterday -- here are two kits clambering upon their FOXFATHER in order to presumably wake his ass up. Again: all parents and pet-owners can relate, I wager.

GET UP GET UP GET UP GET UP GET UP GET UP GET UP GET UP GET UP DAD DAD DAD DAD DAD DAD WAKE UP DAD UP UP UP UP DAD DAD DADDADDADDADDAD WANNA GO HUNTING DAD DAD DAD DAAAAAD

UGGGGH

Of course, once the kits ran off the father (he eventually slunk off into the woods to, I presume, hunt), one of them took up residence on the log and napped and of course I went over to it and I hugged it and brought it home and now it's my BEST FRIEND

flickr.com/photos/terribl…

OKAY FINE I didn't disturb the napping fox, jeez. But if ever you question my restraint in this life, question it no further, for I have not ONCE attempted to become best friends with this skulk of foxes. DESPITE THE FACT I AM OBVIOUSLY THEIR WEIRD FOREST UNCLE.

Also in no world is this a good photo, but the look on that one kit's face as they play is tragically hilarious.

wrasslin

I BELIEVE I CAN FLY

You ever get a child or a pet who is too aggressive with their affection? (Our kid early on used to headbutt us in order to deliver a kiss.) Turns out, animals totally get that, too:

flickr.com/photos/terribl…

WELP, guess I've now met one of the kits.

I knew one was snoozling on the log (as in the picture upthread) -- and I had to get to my shed, so I was just being real quiet-like.

But then as I'm creepity-creeping along, another kit -- with a dead mole or mouse in its mouth! -- trots up past me (about 2 feet away).

It wandered off past the (other) shed. And JUST NOW, came back (sans small dead woodland creature) back across house, down driveway, in front of this shed, and to the den. CLOSE ENCOUNTERS OF THE FOXTH KIND

Needless to say I peed myself. Also surprised at how non-chalant the kit was about getting away from me. Like, she wasn't sticking around, but her escape was a gentle trot, not a hurried flight. She was pretty meh about me.

iPhone photo but two of them are chilling on THE LOGS, like all the cool kits do

The two of them are CUDDLIN' on THE LOGS

there's some life advice, right there, find you someone to CUDDLE upon SOME LOGS

Some new shots over on Flickr -- DRIVEWAY FOXES, y'all

flickr.com/photos/terribl…

And a moment between kit and parent --

flickr.com/photos/terribl…

and finally LI'L FUZZHEAD AHHHH

(initially I typed that as LI'L FUXXHEAD which is a very different mood for this critter)

flickr.com/photos/terribl…

welp a kit just knocked on my door again

THERE ARE FIVE KITS

they’re coming for me

WHO RULES WRITERTOWN

FOXBABBIES RULE WRITERTOWN

this is definitely some "velociraptors learn to open doors" shit right here

also real talk I have to pee and this shed doesn't have a bathroom

I am live tweeting the foxbabby invasion of my shed

next time you see me I will likely be just a skinsuit full of foxbabbies

Sidenote: before this all started to happen, I watched FOXMOM go and collect sticks from the driveway. Which she brought one by one for the kits to play with and chew on. Not surprising, given they're canids -- dogs do like their toys after all. But it was cute.

this account now belongs to the foxen

Fuckhead neighbor called for their fuckhead dogs, startling the foxes back to their den. My wife was outside watching, and then because we live in NATURESVILLE, apparently, snapped a scarlet tanager with her phone:

update: I peed

I know you were all wondering

Just to give you a clue as to how hard it is to sometimes capture photos of these little weirdos -- not only am I operating through hard vantage points and sometimes narrow windows, but also as foliage comes in thicker, I get shots like this:

Momfox picking up sticks for her kits -->

THIS FOX KIT KNOWS WHAT YOU DID LAST SUMMER

flickr.com/photos/terribl…

GOOD MORNING HERE IS YOUR MET GALA FOX

flickr.com/photos/terribl…

and here is your DAILY FOX HUG okay that's not a thing, the daily fox hug, but what if it was

WHAT IF IT WAS

flickr.com/photos/terribl…

(That one actually has a few good outtakes, so to speak, from yesterday.)

Pupdate: saw three kits out this morning briefly. (No close encounters.) Last night I was on Cordkillers with @acedtect specifically to talk about foxes, and while doing so, the foxes were out back -- when I went inside, two kits were playing tug-of-war with a piece of dry grass.

behold the cuteness overload

you cannot stand it

you are crushed beneath it

flickr.com/photos/terribl…

THE FOX, IT KNOCKS
UNLOCK THE LOCKS
HE NEEDS YOUR SOCKS
THE KNOCKING FOX

THE FOX KNOWS THAT
YOU’RE IN THIS BOX
HE THINKS IT ROCKS
THAT YOU HAVE SOCKS

GIVE HIM THE SOCKS
THE KNOCKING FOX
UNLESS YOU’D LIKE
A FOXY POX

I tweeted that video from yesterday and on a lark went to look out the window (they’ve been quiet today) and turns out: FOX SHENANIGANS.

MORNING PUPDATE: they left me a present

(That is a dog toy from our backyard, but I'd brought it out to get rid of it, because the dogs never used this one. Guess the kits have decided they're into it. They already mauled the heck out of it. It's a really rough, ruggedized toy.)

(It was by my shed door.)

Last night, the kits stood vigil in the woods and then did loops around the writing shed -- here's them in the woods, just staring at some shit I couldn't see. I assume ghosts? Maybe elves. Or ELFGEISTS.

Watched a rather tremendous MOUSE POUNCE in action, too, a trick move off the shed foundation --

when you and your buddy both enjoy dad jokes

Family portrait from THE CUDDLIN LOG this morning:

more LOG SHOTS okay wait no let's agree not to call them LOG SHOTS something about that is very wrong

CUDDLE SHOTS

okay that has a weird connotation now too

jfc here are some foxes is what I'm saying

here have another fox

THE FOX IN THE FLOWERBED, a new story from me, coming probably never because I just made it up

flickr.com/photos/terribl…

AWOOGA AWOOGA 🦊 ALERT

this is happening right now

A parent has arrived!

shit the UPS guy came and spooked them

I mean, I like our UPS guy, but bad timing

oh the parental fox brought dinner

I mean, not for me, I'm not eating whatever that is

oh! well

watership down, I guess

really down, eek

OKAY

THAT'S IT

SHUT THE INTERNET DOWN I HAVE THE BEST PHOTO THERE IS NO BETTER PHOTO AND NOW YOU ARE ALL D E A D FROM THE CUTENESS, YOU HAVE EXPIRED, IT'S OVER, GAME OVER, YOU CANNOT WIN AGAINST THIS

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MORNING PUPDATE: The kits were out last night and this morning, racing around, chasing each other, and mouse pouncing from higher and higher heights -- seriously they'll climb three feet up and LEAP, paws out, onto a sibling -- it's a delight to watch them grow up.

It occurs to me that so much of their play is teaching them to be better hunters. (It then occurs to me that some of our human play does the same for us, doesn't it? Hide and seek! Tag! Shooty-shooty-bang-bang games. Not knocking them, but interesting from behavioral standpt.)

(To be clear, I'm not suggesting kids shouldn't play these games or that their games make them violent! And kids who build with blocks won't turn into architects! I mean it as a positive: the role of play as a thing that is foundational.)

ANYWAY, it's cloudy as hell so I don't expect my photos from last night or this morning worked out, but I have new ones from yesterday, when I, the WEIRD FOREST UNCLE, beheld the foxes playing right outside the shed:

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and, some TUSSLIN'

some RASSLIN'

some ORNERY TUMBLIN'

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a brief visit from a bumbling fuzzbutt

A lot of people want to know if I'm ever tempted to just... open the door, and the answer to that is

YES, gods yes, I want to open the door and invite them in and they all mouse pounce into my open hugging arms and we tumble and they definitely don't eat my face and it's amazing

And then they're like, YOU'RE OUR WEIRD FOREST UNCLE and I'm like YOU'RE MY RAMBUNCTIOUS FERAL NEPHEWS and the parent is dubious but we all share a meal of compost trash and baby bunnies and they come back to visit me year after year and we all Instagram it and it's awesome

But of course I don't do that because they're wild animals, however adorable, and they deserve their space and peace, and I want them to have a natural (if not extreme) fear of people, as their wariness is also their salvation

But I damn sure wanna open that door

You can kinda see what the look like racing around in the grassy den area.

foxblep #foxblep

MORNING PUPDATE: so, the hole that they dug in front of the shed (which you can see in earlier videos)? Yeah, one of the fox kits totally pooped in it. So I guess they've entered their teenage years.