Let’s very briefly explain that and then I’ll start the intro
It’s good to know what they’re saying. Less to hear them say it.
Yeah. It’s *that* kind of book.
Better more prepared than less, one supposes. Thank god for whiskey.
So there’s that for historical veracity.
So there’s your shot and here comes the VERY NEXT SENTENCE as a chaser
And WHAT NOW MY DUDE
He uses the term “Janus-faced” a couple sentences later but what a batshit logic pattern does this take
Fuck it, get another round and we’ll get into the first chapter
In which we learn that Trump likes it when other people fix his problems and also spouts out random CEO catchphrases. He likes to think he’s beaten the system and gets mad that everyone doesn’t love him for it, and moreover that it don’t get him no respect.
Remember when pundits were shocked that Trump was petty?)
“The White House, it rapidly dawned on almost everyone who was working there - even as it became one more reason not to work there - was the scene of an ongoing criminal investigation”
WHO WORKED THERE AND DID NOT KNOW THAT
And really, that should be enough to tell everyone
“Donald Trump likes me” should be enough to drive you to a solitary retreat to rethink just everything in your life
None of this matters btw. I met my second husband on a campaign. It’s like band camp.
“You usually have enough competent people for White House positions to weed out the wife beaters, but you couldn’t be so choosy in the Trump White House,” said one Republican acquaintance of Porter’s.”
Who thinks that this is how any of this works, where you get a concentration of power and then you expect that to be your defense against shitty men
And also who thought Trump’s White House wouldn’t be all abuse, all the time
Pages maybe even
“He was confident he could jawbone this “witch hunt”—often tweeted in all-caps—to at least a partisan draw.”
I guess compare this to the impeachment chatter or lack thereof
He kind of did that. Pelosi whipping her caucus into not following up on the Mueller report is kind of that exact thing.
Shorter this book: Trump is a stopped clock.
“What’s more, the trump hangers-on were so demonstrably subpar players that stupidity could well be a reasonable defense against intent.”
But then here’s what we hear about fucking Epstein
Oh DID YOU NOT KNOW ABOUT EPSTEIN
“Epstein and trump had been close friends - playboys in arms as it were”
EPSTEIN RAPES CHILDREN
THIS DOES NOT QUALIFY FOR A BON MOT
Here’s hoping Wolff sells all the books on this gossip or something
I’m tapping out, I’m done, absolutely fucking not, what kind of stunted morality must you have to stay polite in this
For now I see a man covering for a man who covers other men who rape children and tbh I can’t deal with the narrative outside that unless I have perfect control
What a world where I have to control for them
(sorry for the delay, kid stuff)
But in any case, Wolff then turns to shady business deals between Trump and Russian oligarchs! (He's not *saying* Trump laundered cash)
This sentence is so satisfying
That's @PreetBharara btw, follow him for lots of reasons but mostly because he gets it more than most!
Let us all look forward to poetry
"The Embassy’s creepiness and dark heart were in quite stark contrast to Bannon’s expansive and merry countenance."
"That Friday morning, he came down from the residence into the Oval Office in a full-on rage so violent that, for a moment, his hair came undone. To the shock of the people with him, there stood an almost entirely bald Donald Trump."
"In February, Kelly, a retired four-star general, grabbed Trump adviser Corey Lewandowski outside the Oval Office and pushed him up against a wall."
"“It’s civil war,” Bannon said, a happy judgment he often repeated."
I'd have gone with "a judgment he often and happily repeated" but then again I don't often thank Steve Bannon so what do I know.
And now to chapter three: Lawyers!
And onto chapter four: Home Alone!
but man is this true of a lot of dudes
"Roger Stone, Carter Page, George Papadopoulos, Julian Assange?
Bannon was unimpressed: “No way you impeach the president over those dragoons."
You don't really want to know.
are you in:
sleep well, everyone, we pick this back up tomorrow!
which you need to be in order to read this book tbh
at what point do women do things to bankrupt a man that owes them child support
in what universe
Is that not an inherent admission that the behavior itself is disgraceful
Wolff, Michael. Siege (p. 121). Henry Holt and Co.. Kindle Edition. "
I've done network. They give you time to rethink. You get the green room and makeup and a PA brings coffee
but man if you're gonna hit those rails I hope I make a full news cycle and also I hope that I'm going public with all the dirty laundry I've never been able to source properly enough to repeat
My dude writes this in narrative voice:
"Hence, the necessity of Steve Bannon."
but instead it turns out I am fully available for at least another couple hours! Let us delve!
"Schulze was the emissary of a backdoor opening, encouraged by the Chinese, from North Korean leader Kim Jong-un. Trump had declared a virtual death match against the young despot."
I am no sophisticate and I think that's clear. Still I stalk the halls of power now and again and I tell you that Wolff trying to drag Kushner as acolyte of Kissinger the slavish comes off as overwraught no matter its veracity
“I don’t know if anyone will ever understand what we’ve been through,” Ivanka told friends.'
Wolff, Michael. Siege (p. 129). Henry Holt and Co.. Kindle Edition.
Let us all meditate on Ivanka wondering whether anyone else might understand public excoriation
that seems as nice a pondering as one might have of a night
"It gets worse, Kushner told Trump."
Isn't that pretty?
"Kushner even floated the suggestion of Kissinger as secretary of state"
"“Jared’s self-help, business-book-leadership talk was one of the things that attracted Ivanka to him,” said a friend of the couple."
(I am surely not fully sober but this is funny. End of.)
"A contemptuous Hannity, with grandiose ambitions of his own, insisted that this scenario was ludicrous. He would top the ticket, with Bannon, “if he’s lucky,” taking the second spot."
"team. The comms department should have stood between Hannity and the president; instead, Hannity stood between the president and his comms team."
"“Would you let your life depend on Kellyanne Conway, Mercedes Schlapp, or the Huckabee girl?” Bannon asked rhetorically. “That’s some brain trust.”"
"Trump had helped turn the final years of the eighty-seven-year-old Murdoch, a towering figure in conservative politics, into a sour time," 1/2
Man that's good though, fuck rupert murdoch
"“Dude, dude, don’t go bonkers on me,” Bannon would mutter as he watched an evening broadcast."
BRB, need more whiskey
Do they ever? Has anyone ever seen this?
"Nigel Farage—also at Brown’s for a meeting with Bannon and currently looking for a morning gin—seemed to tax Bannon’s self-control as well."
BRB DEFFO getting more whiskey for this
"Melania—rarely approached and certainly never hugged by anyone on Trump’s staff or in his entourage—visibly recoiled from Hannity’s too-close embrace."
Trump apparently was mad at Mattis for being too good to trans folk?
Your reminder that we run camps for brown children
"And if Congress doesn’t impeach you over firing Coats, they will certainly censure you."
"Manafort, Kushner said, was a douche but not a plotter."
I'm never going to forget that testimony for as long as I live.
I wonder what this will be about
Is mostly about the fact that Jared Kushner is best friends with a murderous coke fiend who also happens to be the prince of Saudi Arabia
and that's the end of this chapter!
much love to you stalwarts that keep me company on this
But then we get to the caravan. Brace yourselves, I am sure that Steve Bannon said only kind and wonderful things about asylum seekers!
DUDE IS A RACISTY RACIST! Really makes you wonder what Bannon considers actual racism, given that he's steeped in all his little technical definitions
Our next chapter is called "November 6" and whoo, this should be a ride!
"As Election Day approached, Bannon was glum, but he yet believed in the almost totemic power of the Democrats to fuck things up."
Ironically this sentence makes me feel:
shitty hot dogs at the White House is such a stark representation of that wish
they're just kind of forced to eat the shitty food and smile and say thanks and it's BEAUTIFUL
"For Bannon, China remained everything. It was the key, and the devil was in the details. And Trump got it: “China bad.”"
There are only 24 chapters! We might get this tonight if I get particularly cutting or dismissive!
I'm not sure that's actually what we'd call strategic
this woman makes big-ass bets
(and there are only twenty-four, blessed endings in sight!)
this is donald fucking trump we're talking about here. Dude couldn't define tact nor grace.
Stephen miller writes "only in powerpoint" and I have no questions that I want answered but that's hilarious
The delusions these people have.
What did we learn? I would argue absolutely nothing, excepting a few bitchy anecdotes. I'm petty enough to have enjoyed watching the fights between the awful people.
Lotta naked people walking around here pretending to be clothed is all
Next time something comes out that needs reading, let me know! Y'all remain the best.