John Bull Profile picture
Jul 18, 2019 25 tweets 5 min read Read on X
Sod Pepsi's navy.

Let's talk about the point after WW2 where the Knights Hospitaller, of medieval crusading fame, 'accidentally' became a major European air power.

I shitteth ye not. 🛩️🛩️
So, if I asked you to imagine the Knights Hospitaller you probably picture:

1) Angry Christians on armoured horses
2) Them being wiped out long ago like the Templars.
3) Some Dan Brown bullshit

And you would be (mostly) wrong about all three. Which is sort of how this happened.
From the beginning (1113 or so), the Hospitallers were never quite as committed to the angry, horsey thing as the Templars. They had always (ostensibly) been more about protecting pilgrims and healthcare.

They also quite liked boats. Which were useful for both.
Over the next 150 years (or so), as the Christian grip on the Holy Lands waned, both military orders got more involved in their other hobbies - banking for the Templars, mucking around in boats for the Hospitaller.
This proved to be a surprisingly wise decision on the Hospitaller part. By 1290ish, both Orders were homeless and weakened.

As the Templars fatally discovered, being weak AND having the King of France owe you money is a bad combo.

Being a useful NAVY, however, wins you friends.
And this is why your first vision of the Hospitallers is wrong. Because they spent the next 500 YEARS, backed by France and Spain, as one of the most powerful naval forces in the Mediterranean, blocking efforts by the Ottomans to expand westwards by sea.
To give you an idea of the trouble they caused: in 1480 Mehmet II sent 70,000 men (against the Knights 4000) to try and boot them out of Rhodes. He failed.

Suleiman the Magnificent FINALLY managed it in 1522 with 200,000 men. But even he had to agree to let the survivors leave.
The surviving Hospitallers hopped on their ships (again) and sailed away. After some vigorous lobbying, in 1530 the King of Spain agreed to rent them Malta, in return for a single maltese falcon every year.

Because that's how good rents were pre-housing crisis in Europe.
The Knights turned Malta into ANOTHER fortified island. For the next 200 years 'the Pope's own navy' waged a war of piracy, slavery and (occasionally) pitched sea battles against the Ottomans.
From Malta, they blocked Ottoman strategic access to the western med. A point that was not lost on the Ottomans, who sent 40,000 men to try and take the island in 1565 - the 'Great Siege of Malta'.

The Knights, fighting almost to the last man, held out and won.
Now the important thing here is the CONTINUED EXISTENCE AS A SOVEREIGN STATE of the Knights Hospitaller. They held Malta right up until 1798, when Napoleon finally managed to boot them out on his way to Egypt.

(Partly because the French contingent of the Knights swapped sides)
The British turned up about three months later and the French were sent packing, but, well, It was the British so:

THE KNIGHTS: Can we have our strategically important island back please?
THE BRITISH: What island?
THE KNIGHT: That island
THE BRITISH: Nope. Can't see an island
After the Napoleonic wars no one really wanted to bring up the whole Malta thing with the British (the Putin's Russia of the era) so the European powers fudged it. They said the Knights were still a sovereign state and they tried to sort them out with a new country. But never did
The Russian Emperor let them hang out in St Petersburg for a while, but that was awkward (Catholicism vs Orthodox). Then the Swedes were persuaded to offer them Gotland.

But every offer was conditional on the Knights dropping their claim to Malta. Which they REFUSED to do.
~ wobbly lines ~

It's the 1900s. The Knights are still a stateless state complaining about Malta. What that means legally is a can of worms NO ONE wants to open in international law but they've also rediscovered their original mission (healthcare) so everyone kinda ignores them
The Knights become a pseudo-Red Cross organisation. In WW1 they run ambulance trains and have medical battalions, loosely affiliated with the Italian army (still do). In WW2 they do it too.

Italy surrenders. The allies move on then...

Oh dear.

Who wrote this peace deal again?
It turns out the Treaty of Peace with Italy should go FIRMLY into the category of 'things that seemed a good idea at the time'.

This is because it presupposes that relations between the west and the Soviets will be good, and so limits Italy's MILITARY.

This is a problem.
Because as the early Cold War ramps up, the US needs to build up its Euro allies ASAP.

But the treaty limits the Italians to 400 airframes, and bans them from owning ANYTHING that might be a bomber.

This can be changed, but not QUICKLY.

Then someone remembers about the Knights
The Knights might not have any GEOGRAPHY, but because everyone avoided dealing with the tricky international law problem it can be argued - with a straight face - that they are still TECHNICALLY A EUROPEAN SOVEREIGN STATE.

And they're not bound by the WW2 peace treaty.
Italy (with US/UK/French blessing) approaches the Knights and explains the problem.

The Knights reasonably point out that they're not in the business of fighting wars anymore, but anything that could be called a SUPPORT aircraft is another matter.
So, in the aftermath of WW2, this is the ballet that happens:

The Italians transfer all of their support and training aircraft to the Knights.

This then frees up the 'cap room' to allow the US to boost Italy's warfighting ability WITHOUT breaking the WW2 peace treaty.
This is why, in the late forties/fifties, a good chunk of the 'Italian' air force is flying with a Maltese Cross Roundel.

Because they were not TECHNICALLY Italian. They were the air force of the Sovereign Military Order of Malta.
And that's how the Knights Hospitaller ended up becoming a major air power.

Eventually the treaties were reworked, and everything was quietly transferred back. I suspect it's a reason why the sovereign status of the Knights remains unchallenged still today though.
And that's why today, even thought they are now fully committed to the Red-Cross-esque stuff, they can still issue passports, are a permanent observer at the UN, have a currency...

..,and even have a tiny bit of Malta back.

More here: orderofmalta.int
Standard end of thread stuff:

If you enjoyed this then yay! You can buy me a coffee (but don't feel obliged to) here:

ko-fi.com/garius

And you can find my proper history longform writing here:

medium.com/@garius

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More from @garius

Aug 11, 2023
My favourite IRL Dannatt fact:

In 1999 Major-General Dannatt was CRITICAL to stopping Wes Clark from turning the Kosovo peacekeeping into a hot war with Russia/Serbia.

As he knew when and how he was allowed to reject an order. And his commander, Gen Mike Jackson knew it. /1 🧵
It's June 1999 and a NATO peacekeeping force (KFOR) enters Kosovo under a fragile peace, brokered to end the brutal Balkans wars.

When the first recon elements reach Pristina, though, they find that a small Russian force has also crossed the border and seized the airport.
The Russians (not unfairly) believe they have been cut out of the peacekeeping. But this seizure is an attempt by rogue elements within the Russian government to either provoke an engagement, or secure concessions.

They were FM Ivanov, General Ivashov and FSB head...

...Putin. What Yeltsin’s thoughts on the matter were remains unclear. The President’s grip on power had begun to fade alongside his faculties. To various members of his government, however, it seemed that an opportunity might exist for Russia to emerge from the Kosovo war with some pride after all. Importantly, this group included Foreign Minister Ivanov, General Ivashov (the man in command of much of its southern forces ) and the increasingly influential head of the KGB’s successor organisation the FSB, Vladimir Putin.
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Aug 2, 2023
I'll NEVER tire of the fact that Uber were so desperate to avoid giving drivers sick days in the UK that they accidentally convinced a tribunal they were a cab firm.

That made them VAT liable.

Wrote back in 2019 that HMRC would nail them to the wall: https://t.co/8cyywu7ZfSlondonreconnections.com/2019/schroding…
Uber remains the textbook case of a tech unicorn assuming American corporate law, lobbying and culture can just apply everywhere.

And thus getting UTTERLY undone by not making even the tiniest changes to adapt to a local political and legal market.
The MOMENT they submitted themselves to an employment law case where the Duck Test would be applied under English law, they were fucked.

The moment the tribunal wrote this in their ruling, you could practically SEE HMRC rising, meerkat like, from the savannah. Any organisation (a) running an enterprise at the heart of which is the function of carrying people in motor cars from where they are to where they want to be and (b) operating in part through a company discharging the regulated responsibilities of a PHV operator, but (c) requiring drivers and passengers to agree, as a matter of contract that it does not provide transportation services (through UBV or ULL) and (d) resorting in its documentation to fictions, twisted language and even brand new terminology, merits we think a degree of scepticism.
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Jul 29, 2023
Obscure autobiography arrived yesterday. Been trying to hunt down a copy of for years.

Tiny volume. Person who thinks he's unimportant. Arguably helped save thousands of Jews in WW2.

As is always the case, doesn't credit himself. Blames himself for not somehow saving more.
Flicking through it now and it's heartbreaking. As with Smallbones' papers or Mary Burchill's writings, just good people who stood up, but then cannot forever escape the guilt of thinking they could have done more than they did.

Even as they were doing more than anyone else.
We have a tendency to see 'heroes' as larger than life, and I hate it.

Nearly always they are just regular people who decide they will not accept what is happening, and who they're told to hate, and do what they can.

They just decide to be kind.

And they're haunted by it.
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Jul 25, 2023
To understand Musk's renewed obsession with X and focus on financial services, you REALLY need to understand the X/Confinity merger that became PayPal.

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Here's how that happened. 1/🧵
In early 2000, X hits the news for a vulnerability that allows money to be moved between accounts with just account details. This is fixed, but spooks investors.

Elon agrees with investor Mike Moritz from Sequoia to become CTO while Bill Harris (ex-Intuit) becomes CEO.
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Backed by Nokia, Confinity is making a way to 'beam' money between PalmPilots by infrared.
Read 31 tweets
Jul 24, 2023
Thread on history of X dot com and Melon Husk will have to wait until tomorrow as need to stream.

But in the meantime here is a quick story called:

That Time Elon Totalled his McLaren F1 While Trying to Show Off in Front of Peter Thiel 🧵/1 a very totalled mclaren F1
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Musk (X) is REALLY not happy about this. He wants to WIN. Thiel (PayPal) is happy. He HAS won.
Thiel saw the writing on the wall, as did Bill Harris (formerly of Intuit) - X's CEO after Elon (biggest investor) stepped back to CTO . They have created this merger to save both companies and make lots of money. Harris has bullied Elon into it by threatening to quit otherwise.
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I'm old enough to remember when the Rail Delivery Group insisted that Oyster Cards were the spawn of Satan.

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Best to assume, with ticket office closures, that this is still true.
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The operators make a fortune, every year, from people overpaying for tickets.
This is why smartcard rollout is still shite outside London. There's zero financial benefit to the government or the TOCs in easy, transparent ticketing.

The only person who benefits from that is the passenger, and they aren't shareholders.
Read 15 tweets

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