, 13 tweets, 2 min read Read on Twitter
Hey, let’s re-think “You look great. Have you lost weight?” as the default compliment, shall we? Reasons why this might be problematic:
Someone could have an illness - terminal, wasting, or otherwise, that causes them to lose weight against their will.
Someone could have disordered eating (anorexia, bulimia, etc) that affects their body weight
Someone could be going through a temporary, difficult time that causes them to stop eating, & thus, lose weight
(The weightoss from this difficult life situation is not a “bonus” that makes the difficult life circumstance less awful.)
Someone could NOT AFFORD TO EAT regularly, and as a result are losing weight.
Someone could have an addiction to exercise & not eating (please, y’all, read HEAVY, by @KieseLaymon ) and be losing weight.
Someone could be depressed, or anxious, & therefore not eating, and thus, losing weight.
So, if you see someone & they are a different shape (I.e., have “lost weight”), how about just saying any of the following....
“Hey, good to see you! You’re looking well!”
“Great to see you! How are you feeling? Everything good?”
And, if you must, “I’ve noticed you seem to have lost weight. How are you feeling?”
Optimal: you could greet someone you haven’t seen in awhile by not FIRST commenting on their body, size, or appearance.
As in: “SO GREAT TO SEE YOU!” //
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