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Sayed Tabatabai, MD

@TheRealDoctorT

Oct 31

Sometimes I like to look at the people on the other side of the glass.

I watch them as they live their lives.

Trusting in the world around them, trusting that the sun will rise.

I used to trust too. But trust can take you places.

Places you never wanted to go. 1/

It’s 2004. I’m an intern, fresh out of med school.

So far the experience of being an actual honest-to-goodness bonafide doctor has been a mixed bag.

Some days are encouraging. But I’m struggling with imposter syndrome.

I didn’t know the M.D. stood for “Mostly Depressed.” 2/

I don’t know that I really believed in imposter syndrome before. The idea seemed silly. After all the work I’ve put in, how can I doubt myself?

Turns out it’s not that hard.

Every nurse seems to see right through my incompetence. Patients want to see the “older doctor.” 3/

Read 25 tweets

Sayed Tabatabai, MD

@TheRealDoctorT

Sep 23

I glance down at the paperwork my patient has filled out before his visit.

Occupation: Retired harbour master.

Two things: I’ve never met a harbor master before. And “harbour” with a “u.”

Interesting.

It’s the little everyday mysteries that I love most. That reveal us. 1/

He’s almost 100 years old, and yet he springs up from his seat when I enter the room. He shakes my hand so firmly I can feel the sting in my knuckles.

His smile is ear to ear, and his eyes are bright.

“Doctor, how are ya? Good to see you!”

I can’t help but smile, “Hello!” 2/

As I take a seat, I instinctively pull my seat closer to his.

With my patient population, I’ve learned to sit closer, to speak slower, and louder. Be direct.

Sometimes I forget to switch this off. Sometimes younger patients wince and tell me to stop yelling at them.

Sorry. 3/

Read 17 tweets

Sayed Tabatabai, MD

@TheRealDoctorT

Nov 14, 2023

To all those students who’ve had a question, but worried that it’s too obvious, or unnecessary, or worst of all, stupid…

Ask.

As someone who answers questions for a living, let me tell you something about questions.

They’re more than just questions. 1/

Every question asked is a spark. A sign. That wheels are turning. That thoughts are following a thread.

Even if it’s the wrong thread, you won’t know until you ask.

Questions give us pause.

Questions give us chances.

Chances to review. To reframe. To re-evaluate. 2/

Wrapped up within every question is an opportunity.

An opportunity to see things through different eyes.

An opportunity to do better, to be better.

It’s the ones who don’t ask questions that I worry about.

It’s the ones who don’t ask questions who make me nervous. 3/

Read 6 tweets

Sayed Tabatabai, MD

@TheRealDoctorT

Oct 31, 2023

I went into medicine to help people.

No, really, I did. I know it sounds corny now, or fake, I suppose. But there was a reason for this.

At least once.

I have to keep telling myself that. Keep remembering that.

Because I’m running out of time.

And I want you to know. 1/

Anyways, backtrack. I’m a radiologist. I spent years training to be able to look at imaging and see a vast variety of problems.

I’m not one to boast, but I’m pretty good at what I do.

You might even say I’m gifted.

But some gifts… well, they come back to bite you. 2/

Be systematic. That’s my mantra. Be systematic, always. It’s the discipline of the thing.

I will never meet most of the patients whose studies I review, but I still feel a certain… attachment.

A responsibility to do my best.

Being systematic means I don’t miss anything. 3/

Read 22 tweets

Sayed Tabatabai, MD

@TheRealDoctorT

Apr 24, 2023

On the morning of his 95th birthday, Joe woke up at exactly 6AM.

This small irony never failed to irritate him: he had never been a morning person, but the more the years passed, the earlier he woke.

“Well, this is it!” He said, to no one, as he swung his legs out of bed. 1/

He brushed his teeth methodically, a small timer telling him when it had been exactly three minutes.

Rinsing out his mouth, he couldn’t help but smile as he thought of the day ahead.

The last day.

Joe had made up his mind years ago that his 95th birthday would be his last. 2/

He wasn’t suicidal, mind you, he enjoyed life and had no intention of killing himself.

He was just tired. He had no friends left, no family. And he had always been a sociable man.

Life just didn’t excite him anymore. He’d seen it all, done it all.

He missed his wife. 3/

Read 24 tweets

Sayed Tabatabai, MD

@TheRealDoctorT

Feb 20, 2023

I have only ever known you within the confines of this exam room in my office.

Years ago, you were sent to me for a consultation.

Understandably nervous, you had all your questions written out on a notepad in your spidery handwriting.

You believe in being organized. 1/

As we go through each question, one by one, you cross it off your list.

I have questions for you too. For one, I want to know where you got your glasses. I need new frames.

It makes you smile for the first time in the visit.

As if perhaps things might be okay.

Maybe. 2/

The years pass. I only ever see you when you come to my office for a followup.

You still write your questions down, but with the passing of time, there are fewer and fewer.

I know you exist outside this exam room, as a whole person. And that’s who I try to get to know. 3/

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