, 12 tweets, 3 min read
THREAD: The Vicious Cycle of Fearing Reality

The "goal" of reproducing (i.e. how genes work), is not to reproduce 1x, but to reproduce over and over.

Thus, parents aren't mainly teaching children to stay alive but moreso how to keep reproducing aka *how to be a parent*

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The patterns we learn in early childhood, are cemented into our brains like nothing else at any other time, and with good reason...

Children are "suicide machines", i.e. they don't know a thing about not hurting themselves...they learn what is MEGA-DANGER from parents...

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And then they avoid these learned dangers like the plague. Think about how you think about moving your hand towards touching a hot stove. You begin to recoiling (literally) before your brain processes that you should move away from it...

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Thus far may be obvious...But consider how this same functionality (extreme susceptibility to powerful conditioning for avoiding danger) may work in ways other than physical danger...

It can (and very much is) done with emotions and thoughts as well.

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Does a parent yell at, belittle, make uncomfortable, shun, punish (all disincentivize) a child (confused noob to the world) when he/she expresses certain emotions (anger, sorrow, shyness, etc. etc.) not to the parent's preference/liking?...

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Does this express that these emotions are dangerous to the child?

(Think what would have happened to a child who caused discomfort for his parents when there was much less food and much more danger around...death.)

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Does this lead to a *fear* of those emotions and similarly to the hot stove example above, an *instant* and recoiling from those emotions as opposed to the ability to explore and diffuse them?

Do emotions that we're afraid to deal with/process cause problems?

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Unequivocally yes:

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You learn to shun the behaviors of your children from your parents who shunned your behaviors.

This cycle is passed down from generation to generation.

You're either continuing it or you can work on breaking it.

(Strong conditioning, hard work, but worth it.)

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If you are a parent, or expect to be one, one of the most bang-for-your-buck possible good things you can do for the world & yourself, is to learn about what you learned in childhood, and how it unconsciously drives your life. Recommended reading: amazon.com/Drama-Gifted-C…

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How do I know it's such a high value undertaking?

Besides the obvious ability to better control our brains, anytime I talk about thus subject, people get pissed at me. They know parenting is extremely high stakes. Catch flak, over target...

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That's about all.

If you found this useful, and you're inclined to share it, I greatly appreciate it.

If you disagree with what I'm saying, please feel free to send me a DM with a couple times that work to discuss the matter for a podcast.

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