The $5 million federal government agency in search of a reason to exist.

Or as Scott Morrison's tourism team would say: what the bloody hell are you?

(with @jommy_tee)
#collaborativeimpact #nowedontknowwhatitmeanseither
This month has been a busy one for the government, what with forged travel expenses & $675,000 of drought texts going astray, so you'd be forgiven for missing an incredibly important event:

the release of the glossy annual report of the Infrastructure Project Finance Agency.
Some of you may remember the IPFA from a few months back when we accidentally discovered their existence and wondered what it was they did.

Which must have been a similar thought process to the staff employed at the agency itself.…
Because you see, despite their magnificent annual report, costing over $16,500 and replete with 20+ pages of photos of airports and dams and railway stations and bridges, (none of which the IPFA have appear to have anything to do with) . . .
. . . & despite our best investigative endeavours – nobody has been able to clarify what exactly it is the IPFA actually does.

The one-man scandal headline, Angus Taylor set up the agency as the impressively named Assistant Minister for Cities & Digital Transformation in 2017.
Since then at an annual cost of $5 million a year to the taxpayer, the Utopia styled agency-in-search-of-a-reason-to-exist appears to have done . . . well

. . . they've reduced their paper wastage and turned off the lights when they're not there.

So that's a start.
But all their hard work in putting out the recycle bins pales into insignificance when you realise that one third of their annual budget is spent on the wages of just four staff members.

$1.6 million in wages for, well, who knows = a lot of recycled paper.
Yes you read that right.

$1,646,723 of the IPFA's annual budget is consumed in remuneration and contract payments to four people - the CEO, and 3 seemingly invisible managing directors.

And still with no indication of what the agency does.
We say invisible because despite the beautifully laid out graphs in the IPFA annual report, the actual remuneration (3 x ~$400K) of the three managing directors - Rob Ritchie, Catherine Black, and Chris Allen - appears to be missing.
But fear not, the CEO Leilani Frew has some wonderful words to inspire you just in case you're in a blind fit of rage over the orgy of over-spending by the Morrison government in the age of #RoboDebt & #NDIS fails.

You see Ms Frew's team provide "capability building services".
How's that for value for money?

Not only did the IPFA team provide the "client service-operating model" you never knew you needed but they also took over, wait for it - 100 requests.

That's almost 2 whole requests a week for a staff of 14 spread over 2 separate city offices.
In addition to being run off their feet by almost 2 requests a week, the staff of 14 plus the 3 managing directors (we presume) also excelled themselves in delivering something called "PrACTice Event Series"

Alas, the annual report offers no further clues about these events.
We do know that the Infrastructure Project Finance Agency - although scant on any details of what these workshops actually did - did manage to provide 11 of them instead of their predicted 10, which comes to almost 1 a month at a cost to taxpayers of well,

nobody knows really.
So if you're struggling along on Newstart, or trying to make sense of a drought funding application form, don't be disheartened.

Remember the staff at the IPFA are still there struggling along on their almost 2 requests a week, offering "support" to other government projects,
projects they appear to have nothing to do with, all at a cost of $13,698 (one year's Newstart) per day to the taxpayer.

But at the very least, they're "arranging high quality knowledge sharing forums & capability building activities."

And emptying their recycling bins.
"We file - therefore we are."
Our @jommy_tee has a more in-depth article on your favourite agency coming up in the next few days with @MichaelWestBiz

If you would like to endure the literary equivalent of slowly pelting yourself with thumb tacks, here's the link to the report:…
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