, 11 tweets, 2 min read
We beat the shit out of the Welsh for speaking Welsh in Wales (thread)
amazon.co.uk/52-Times-Brita…
There's nothing the English find more offensive than foreigners in their own country speaking their own language. Just ask someone who works in a restaurant in Magaluf. And ask them in English for Christ's sake, it's the only way they'll learn.
This has been true for centuries. We thought foreigners sounded weird back in time where we'd happily start a sentence with "yea verily".
In the 1800s, the English took over the running of schools in Wales. True to form, when they arrived and found that the Welsh children were speaking Welsh in Wales, they were madder than an expat in Spain who's just discovered their local tapas restaurant don't serve pie.
The schools introduced something called a "Welsh Not". If a child was heard speaking Welsh (as the Welsh are sometimes known to do) they were given a piece of wood inscribed with "WN" to wear around their necks.
This could only be passed on to another student if they were found to be guilty of the heinous crime of also speaking in their native language.

Kids were encouraged to rat on their friends, which is probably why to this day you have never heard of a Welsh mafia.
At the end of the day (or week in some generous accounts), whoever was left wearing the Welsh Not was beaten mercilessly by their teacher. Sort of like pass the parcel, but instead of a prize the winner gets the shit kicked out of them by someone trusted with their wellbeing.
The idea was basically to shame children for being bilingual, encourage a culture of snitching, and make tiny children associate their parents speaking Welsh at home with intense feelings of physical pain.
It was a massive success if you consider helping to kill off an ancient language because you don't know the Welsh for "WELL WHAT KIND OF PIES DO YOU DO" a success. Which we do.
Another sample of times Britain has been a bellend from my book here. Available from all good and evil retailers.
Still can't believe how high up it is in the charts. Thank you all past and future purchasers, and for all the lovely reviews.
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