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Like, can I just tell all the people currently telling me "survive just to spite them" and "existing is an act of resistance" and "don't mourn, organise" to just... fuck off?

Like, seriously, fuck OFF. I've BEEN organising, I've BEEN existing, I've BEEN surviving. I'm tired.
You know what I've been doing for the last week? Dealing with two separate Twitter harassment campaigns. Giving emotional support to a friend. Visiting an NHS council meeting that dragged on for three goddamn hours.
Me? @CaseyExplosion? @FENNERGY? @StebMcDreb? @AlixWzl? The British and Irish trans community? We've been the canaries in the fucking coal mine, mate. We're very small in number and very vulnerable to attack. We've been warning you, and you've been nodding while we work.
People told me to "get off fucking Twitter and actually do something with my life" so I started organising with activist groups and going on marches and giving speeches at solidarity rallies.

I'm not just a Twitter warrior, I'm actually out there trying to fight.
Today I had to listen to THREE HOURS of discussion about finance and oversight sub-committees just so I could get a little bit of a word in during the fifteen minutes they gave us for public questions at the end.

I don't get paid for this! As they say, lmao I do it for free!
All the trans activists I know? We're all fucking exhausted, sick, in pain, afraid, burnt out, struggling under the weight of debts and expenses and my fucking god is it difficult for us to get jobs.

But when we ask for a crowdfund, my god, we're scamming! We're mooches!
I don't care what you think about Corbyn or Labour or any of these career politician bastards. I don't give a shit.

The day after those documents about the privatization of the NHS dropped, there should've been a million of you fuckers in the streets of Westminster.
I'm not going anywhere. Don't y'all worry about me. I've discovered I can't leave even if I wanted to.

But I'm sick of being told - especially by straight white leftist men who should know better - that it's my responsibility to live just to upset some conservatives.
I am not interested in survival. I'm not interested in scraping by. I'm not interested by the skin of my teeth or hanging on a thread.

I don't want to live just to be the effigy of someone else's hatred. And while I certainly do feel a lot of spite, it brings me no joy.
We have done **ALL WE CAN**

Trans people have fought for gay marriage, abortion rights, healthcare, unions, education, housing, infrastructure, public transit, we've fought for all of this shit and more.

We have fought and bled and died and wept over graves.
Don't tell us to live just to spite someone.
Don't tell us to survive as a radical act.
Don't tell us to live because our struggle is "an inspiration" to you.

Get out onto the streets and bring down the system.

It really is all up to you now.
And it is really goddamn easy for you to say "we'll survive, outlast the conservatives"

You act as if the conservatives will die out
As if the conservatives aren't recruiting the next generation of footsoldiers
As if outlasting is just something we can all do
I'm not saying don't ask me to keep fighting

I'm saying I'm no longer interested in playing this sick game just for the privilege of being able to keep playing

If you're not going to offer me a very clear path to victory, stop telling me to keep walking, it gets better, honest.
And for fuck's sake, stop telling me that we're all good, deep down.

If anything should've proven that some people are not only evil but gleefully and knowingly so, it was the last four years.
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