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I’m restarting today’s #WarOnChristmas thread from here because some pedant who probably shouts “Merry Christmas” to everyone had to point out that I typed “15” twice, when obviously I meant there are only 10 days left to persecute right-wing Christians by including everyone.
Time to build to today’s
#WarOnChristmasAdventCalendar reveal!

Yesterday, we broke the fourth wall, using two sobering anniversaries to examine how the phony “war on Christmas” itself is a weapon in the authoritarian US Right’s ongoing information war.

So, what incarnation (pun intended) of anything-but-Xmas should we employ today in order to peeve the snowflake army of “Merry Christmas” maniacs?

There are a number of appealing possibilities for a historian (yes that is my professional training) to draw on.

One possibility is to mark the ratification of the Bill of Rights, the first ten Amendments to the U.S. Constitution, on December 15, 1791.

Technically December 15 has been Bill of Rights Day since that good ol’ Commie, President Franklin D. Roosevelt, proclaimed it such in 1941
Of course, running with Bill of Rights Day is a bit fraught. The rabid Right claims to love it as much as we godless liberals do, even though what they really love is only a radically uninhibited interpretation of 2A and a peculiarly cramped and discriminatory version of 1A.
However, our asinine reactionary Christians harbor a hatred for FDR so intensely vitriolic it almost rivals their contempt for Al Gore or even Hillary Clinton—a Baptist and a Methodist for those of you who are keeping score.

FDR was an Episcopalian, so he’s clearly right out.
Oh wait, what’s that you say? George Herbert Walker Bush was also an Episcopalian?

A bit awkward I suppose, but no wonder that #RINO was a one-term president amirite. He was probably even secretly on our side in the #WarOnChristmas

In any case, if you plan on persecuting conservative Christians by greeting them with “Happy Bill of Rights Day,” be prepared to follow up by

a) mocking them by feigning shock when they show they no idea that today is Bill of Rights Day and

b) emphasizing evil Commie FDR’s role
If you fail to deploy tactics a) and b) above, invoking Bill of Rights Day is a #WarOnChristmas strategy that can easily go sideways.

Of course, there is a perhaps more obvious option, and it also has to do with our American Constitution.

Does anybody know what I have in mind?
Obviously I am talking about the end of prohibition, that moral panic policy forced on us by Christian scolds as the 18th Amendment to the US Constitution.

On this day in 1933, the 21st Amendment went into effect, repealing the 18th.

Thanks, godless Commie Episcopalian FDR!
So, you want to take an active part in the #WarOnChristmas on December 15?

Invite a FOX “News” watcher to have a drink—in honor of FDR and the 21st Amendment

Just set one ground rule—no saying “merry Christmas.” How could they dishonor the Bill of Rights on its day like that?
And now, without further ado, let’s open up the little door in the #WarOnChristmasAdventCalendar for December 15!

I’m opening it now, and...

Holy wow is that tacky, even for our enemy...

Okay, are you read?

Beneath the door



The laziest Christmas tree ever!
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Catch up on the rest of the #WarOnChristmasAdventCalendar here:

Oh, Dec 15 is also the third Sunday of Advent this year so like light a candle and some shit if you want to.

And now I bid you happy 21st Amendment, you filthy animals! Raise a glass to FDR
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