Thread by @quantian1

Sadly, even though today is the day where I deserve the best treats possible for being a good boy, I am forced to prepare my tendies by myself.

We will start with breakfast: a turmeric-cured gravlax toast that I shamelessly cribbed from Bon Appetit.

A preview, to whet your appetites:

Come on, is this not the most beautiful steak you’ve seen in your life? Don’t lie to me now.

First mistake: Modernist potato purée, but I subbed in rendered wagyu fat for butter. Problem, of course, was that I used the same amount of cream and they came out a touch thin.

Let’s call this one a dubious move. I waffles back and forth between this and a 2008 Egly-Ouriet Millesime, but figured that the high acidity, low tannin, and low fruit of an off year would work. Not wrong- it was very good- but perhaps the other choice was superior.

Our first course this evening is just a repeat of brunch, but better, mostly by adding a ton of caviar and a shot of Japanese vodka to chase it.

Our second course, served izakaya-style with crispy garlic, 4-year aged soy sauce, and wasabi, over the aforementioned mashed potatoes. Can I quibble about the potatoes being thin or the steak being medium rare instead of rare? Sure, but it’s still crazy good.

Will there be dessert? Obviously. Have I made it? No. Do I have the required ingredients? Also no.

...Be right back.

Can’t believe this fucking thing requires me to get my xanthan gum scale out and measure 150 mg of xanthan gum

We will be moving on from a !? pairing to a !! one. Normally the only wines I buy from the Iberian peninsula are from Catalonian separatists, for obscure reasons I have forgotten; but I’ll make an exception for 1994 port.

Chocolate sponge cake. I screwed this one up, dear readers, by plating in order cake-espresso whipped cream-miso caramel- serve. The correct order for the otherwise delicious recipe is caramel-cake-serve-dispense WC tableside. Or maybe just use another N2O capsule, idk.