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#XiCheng #HistoricAu #Mpreg #EmpressJiang

When he woke up he felt a terrible weight on his body and it was painful to breathe. There were traces of tears on his cheeks and terrible pain on his chest, but despite the physical discomfort he felt euphoric.
Everything seemed to have been a horrible dream.

Everything looks different and reminds him of that time he had an accident where he almost died.
However, when listening to the doctor's questions and seeing his face, he realizes that he is not that man in his almost 70 years, he looks much younger ... he looks as if ...

"Your majesty, your majesty, are you alright?"
You can sense his genuine concern and recognize his voice. Also to that young disciple, the last time he saw him he was already a family man and an excellent doctor but now ... now he looks like a little boy.

"What ... what day is ..."
The doctor lets out a long breath and answers the question, informing him that he has spent about three weeks in a coma.

"He had us very concerned, both the second prince and his uncle have left his side only to attend to important matters."
One of the emperor´ personal servants approaches to offer him something to drink, to which Emperor Lan accepts it with gratitude and drinks almost without grace forgetting that he is not alone. The doctor lets out a long breath and answers the question, informing him that he has
spent about three weeks in a coma.

"He had us very concerned, both the second prince and his uncle have left his side only to attend to important matters."
As much as he tried to listen to the physician's words, his mind wandered, he kept thinking about how everything seemed so unreal and that was when it hit him. His honey-colored gaze widened and acquired a hopeful glow,
whether it was a nightmare or that he had gone back in time meant that... he was there.

He ignored his discomfort and got out of bed, ignoring that he was still in private clothes and the calls of his servants and doctor.

"Your Majesty!"
The servants and doctor were scared to see him fall, it was normal he just woke up from a coma and the first thing he did was act without care.

"Your Majesty, you have just awakened, you must maintain absolute rest!"
The emperor Lan shook his head and tried to articulate a word but the only thing that came out was strong exhalations. Between the physician and his disciple helped him up, apologizing in the process for touching him without permission.

"CALL EMPRESS JIANG!"
CALL EMPERATRICE JIANG! "

The room fell into a terrible silence, one that left them frozen and especially the newcomer. They all looked towards Jin GuangYao, the only imperial concubine whose smile seemed to break for a few moments.
"Haven't you heard me? I have ordered you to call Empress Jiang!"

The servants turned to see the imperial concubine and then the emperor, neither of knew whom exactly whether to abide by his order or stay in line with a lie to favor the Jin.
However, there was no further need for the emperor to call him again when the empress's personal servants announced him.

Lan Huan felt a tightness in his chest when he saw his empress enter the room, looking so beautiful and stunning in one of those suits
that exquisitely accentuated his body and that was the first time he noticed even the smallest detail of embroidery.
Empress Jiang had his hair tied back and with simple but elegant decorations; the most prevalent was a silver hairpin with lotus decorations made from the finest material. It was that same ornament that for many nights he held in his hands while crying in the room
that once belonged to his empress but that because of his blindness he came to lose him.

Back then he never paid attention to anything that related to his empress, his talks were simple and he never even asked him what he liked or disliked.
He didn't even realize how Jiang Cheng used that hairpin almost every day, because it had been a courtship gift and he only knew it once he couldn't see him anymore and his son confessed it to him.

"What is all this commotion?"
There was a moment when the empress's hard gaze softened and filled with deep joy, but he felt hesitant and wished to go with his beloved emperor and make sure himself that he was all right, but with a small sweep of his eyes he saw that /he/ was already there.
Again he was second in everything, he couldn’t even be first not when he spent nights watching over him and even if it was against his husband, well... being punished it'll be nothing at least know he’s husband is back again so it would be worth it.
Empress Jiang hardened his beautiful face and heart, putting on a cold, hard shield to protect himself from what was to come.

"Are all of you deaf? How do you allow the emperor to wander around when he's barely awakened ?! ”
“A-Cheng...” He took a couple of dubious and wobbly steps, as if he feared that his beloved empress would disappear at any moment. But when he saw that his A-Cheng was still there,
that his beloved empress was still showing that adorable frown and for the first time deciphering the meaning of his gaze he felt ... he felt pain.

Jiang Cheng had always seen him like this?

He had never taken the time to figure out his husband's actions or glances, but
this nightmare where he spent long years denying his death and feeling his absence led him to understand.

Everyone wondered at the time, what could be affecting the emperor's mental judgment? He had never call like that to empress Jiang and only show affection to concubine Jin.
Jin GuangYao was the first to approach his emperor by taking him gently and whispering sweet words full of concern.

“My emperor, please be aware that you just has hardly awakened. I implore you to go back to bed, please”
The physician approached them then, worried about his majesty and wishing that this situation did not become dangerous between empress Jiang and imperial concubine Jin.

“Your majesty, please listen to imperial concubine Jin. The best thing for you is to rest”
That was a painting where it seemed that the voice and presence of the empress were ignored, the guards in his service felt their blood boil, how could they put a simple concubine above his majesty?

"Empress Jiang, rest easy I will take care of our emperor"
Jiang Cheng clenched his fists until they were white, taking advantage of the fact that the length of his dress covered him, but nothing could protect his gaze filled with sadness and anger.
“Seeing that Imperial concubine Jin has everything under control, then I can go easy. I know that the emperor stays in good hands ”

There was a point where he got tired of insisting.
It was never his parents' priority and when he believed that the gods had finally smiled at him by uniting him with such a good man ... his illusions and heart were shattered.

He was neither beautiful nor soft, nor did have a melodious voice,
he was very different from Jin GuangYao. When he tried to protect his place as empress, all he managed was to get trampled under a mere concubine, yet he couldn't help but love Lan Huan.
His emperor was never cruel to him and he always respect him, from the beginning and without even sharing a gesture of intimacy, he let him know his disgust at an arranged marriage where it deprived them both of finding happiness.
That day, Jiang Cheng listened him calmly, praying that his emotions weren’t going to betray him, because that simple and innocent confession only continued to hurt him.
The emperor did not offer him love but a noble friendship, they shared afternoons drinking tea with snacks or strolled through the gardens.

However, the gods became cruel and both were forced to give an heir.

He always dream of making love, giving and receiving kisses.
To feel his skin was marked with the warm caresses of his beloved husband while they whispered to each other sweet and loving words; in the end he received the opposite.
Surely his mistake was being greedy and wanting more than he had already been given. It was impossible not yearning for a tiny gaze of him or the desire to spend more time together and use it as a balm for his poor already broken heart.
Maybe that was his mistake, wishing for the love of a man already in love.

His only memory that he had ever been touched by him, was a little baby wrapped in exquisite sheets and with a look so similar to his dearest husband.
The future heir of the kingdom, a baby who was not afraid to laugh or show a gummy smile, snuggled against to his chest.

His little boy was like a ray of sunshine in that darkness.
Yes, Empress Jiang felt warm when she saw that smile and saw his son grow, A-Yi became very dependent on him.

The Lan must not have been pampered, but the empress, despite his harsh exterior, fell before the genuine charm of his beloved son.
A small heir loved by the empress and slightly ignored by his father the emperor.

Lan Huan swallowed with difficulty, remembering how his mistakes came to cost him dearly, leaving his son to finish growing up without his mother's warmth and affection.
Secretly sneaking into a room that kept thousands of secrets and beautiful moments, where Empress Jiang invited him to sleep on those nights where the monsters escaped under the bed.

Lan JingYi grew up listening to a sweet voice singing lullabies or wonderful stories.
Or for days he was reflected against the mirror and letting his hair be combed and braided by the loving hands of his beloved mother.

That room that Lan Huan did not pay attention to when he had the opportunity, it became a refuge in days
where it took him time to accept the death of the one who loved him despite everything.

That room became a sanctuary where traces of his empress still remained. At times he could sense Jiang Cheng's presence, he could hear his sweet voice or shy caresses when he slept.
Emperor Lan awaken from his reverie when he saw the movements of exquisite fabrics and his husband's small back, he felt his heart filled with affliction when he saw him leave and struggled against the grip of his imperial concubine.
"A-Cheng" his distress-filled call stopped Empress Jiang's footsteps and frozen the servants who had a chance to see his majesty cry.

"JIANG CHENG !!" He called him again and this time using his full name.
The empress felt chills run through his body and slowly turned in the direction of his husband, he saw him ignoring that lover of his and despite his weakness the emperor was insistent on walking in his direction.

"A-Cheng, don't ... don't leave me please"
His body moved of its own accord and when he least expect it, the emperor sought refuge in his arms. Lan Huan's weight and height played against him and both ended up on their knees on the ground.

That was a scandal!
No one ever imagined that the emperor as soon as he woke up would behave in that way and would look for the arms of his husband, many of them there were incredulous and others came to think that perhaps that accident that his majesty suffered, had served to open his eyes.
"Are you insane ?! This is not the time for you to act careless, do you not understand that you are still weak?"

The emperor chuckled through tears and the lump in his throat, feeling a joy that he had deprived himself of for years.
His arms sought to surround the figure of his empress, feeling the younger male tense in his embrace.

If he thought about it, it was understandable, they never had that kind of gesture and now that he had him in his arms he realized what he had lost for years.
His ears delighted with the beat of that beautiful heart and the movement of his chest each time he breathed, that was definitive proof that his husband was alive and in his arms, that it wasn't another allusion torturing him.
Jiang Cheng stood still in the middle of that hug, not knowing very well how to act. However, his barriers ended up collapsing as soon as he heard the soft babble of his husband and noticed his pallor and asking him to stay by his side.
With his arms he covered it, as if were the wings of a majestic phoenix helping the dragon. His fingers moved gently and carefully over the rows of black hair, ignoring the menacing male gaze.
This time Jiang Cheng took a liberty that had been deprived for many years. The empress gave the order to vacate the room, leaving only his servants and physician. Of course, such freedom seemed to anger Jin GuangYao, who did not hesitate to point out his disagreement.
"His majesty is very noble, but I know how busy he is so I will take care of our emperor"

"Are you deaf?" The strong embrace of his husband gave him strength to speak, even when Lan Huan repeated his name with affection and perhaps was only the product of some fever,
he thought to cling to that opportunity.

“The emperor has spoken and it is me whom he wishes to have by his side"
Jin GuangYao showed a mocking smile and his gaze took on a malicious glow.

"However, the emperor isn’t in good health and perhaps the fever is speaking in his behalf.”
The room melted into heavy silence, and before his personal guards took any action, the empress motioned for them to remain still.

"The presence of the empress is not essential, it has not been for a long time"
Words so daring for someone so small and of lesser rank; the empress was tempted to get up and slap the man but his wishes were frustrated by the emperor's embrace. Everyone came to think that his majesty had come to his senses and would end this discussion, leaving his lover as
the victor.

However, the emperor got up with difficulty and help from his husband. Lan Huan felt miserable upon seeing Jiang Cheng's downcast gaze, as if it were a matter of seconds to be reprimanded for his audacity to speak against an imperial concubine.
Is this what his family was referring to?

A couple of years ago he saw the disappointed face on his father and the pain on his mother, they were the first to see firsthand how he humiliated his husband without even realizing it.
His uncle came to reprimand him several times, disapprovingly reminding him that in the records there was no emperor of the Lan dynasty who had come to put a mere concubine above the empress. Even if there was no love between the two regents, there should be mutual respect and he
... he never respected Jiang Cheng's position, leading him to become a simple image.

His brother simply came to see him with disappointment and a few times to intercede for his brother-in-law, he knew that Wei Ying had something to do with it but he simply ignored the warnings.
Lan Huan saw Jin GuangYao wanting to approach him, but with a wave of his hand motioned for him to not do it.

"Your ... your majesty?"

Despite his discomfort, the emperor frowned lightly, looking at those closest to him, and then at his husband, who kept cowering beside him.
"My empress has given an order and I hope you will obey it."

There were faces of disbelief, no one was able to believe what their emperor said with such certainty. Jiang Cheng's servants were the first to react, the people of Yunmeng were more daring and vivid and it seems that
these servants already had time wishing to kick out the servants of that concubine or anyone else who dared to look bad on their sovereign.
“However, I understand your reactions,” he whispered, slowly turning to his empress to take his hands and look him in the eye. “I have made so many mistakes against my empress that I realized late, at least now I have an opportunity to fix them"
Jiang Cheng never, nor in his dreams did he imagined receiving kisses on his hands and a look full of hope, Lan Huan never saw him with melancholy and longing intertwined.

Jiang Cheng never saw a gaze full of love and devotion directed towards him, but in that instant
he saw everything he wanted and more, letting some regret swim in those honey-colored orbs.

"Your majesty ... but ..."
Without seeing him, the emperor indicated them to escort Jin GuangYao out of the room, since at the moment he wasn’t in conditions to deal with him, he would solve one problem at a time. But rught now he wanted to be in bed and heal, having his empress by his side and if
it was possible to share the bed with him.

Some servants doubted and it was the empress’s who obeyed his orders without hesitation.

From afar he heard the claims of his concubine, but decided to ignore them. In the past, he let him do and undo, he gave him
power which abused behind his back and even when he was warned, he never believed in his family or husband. He was mocked by a mask of false innocence and believed in lies covered with honey.
"Are you sure of what you are doing?"

The room was cleared in no time, both regents returned in short steps to the room that was best accommodated by the Empress' maids. The bed covers were changed and the pillows accommodated, and the windows were opened to ventilate the room.
"Now I am sure of what I'm doing” was his reply.

Jiang Cheng sighed softly, he couldn’t faithfully believe his husband's word and feared that at any moment he would come to his senses come to his senses and expel him of the room.
The physician and disciple carefully approached the couple to finish administering ointment and bandaging the emperor's wounds, who seemed happy and calmer to keep his husband by his side.

For many, the surprise on the face of their empress was notorious,
it was as if those blue-violet gems had recovered their sparkle.

Possibly Lan Huan had broken the protocol by having his husband while he was being attended by the physician, but having him by his side and feeling the warmth of his hand reassured him and helped him to ignore
the burning sensation he felt on his abdomen every time the medicine was applied.
“The injuries are not serious but that does not mean that will be neglected, it’s also possible that the fever will continue until tomorrow morning. The bandages should be changed every four hours in addition to applying this medicinal ointment. I will also prescribe a
concoction that will help lower the fever and ease the pain in case it becomes unbearable and prevents you from sleeping at night”

A couple of servants /the spiders/ approached the doctor to receive his instructions and how to prepare the medicine. They both looked at their
empress, assuring him with a glance that they would take care of the medicine.

"There’s not doubt that the gods have been on his majesty side and have protected him" doctor and disciple bowed to both rulers "They kept him safe from serious danger and...”
A glance was enough to understand and for the doctor and pupil to excused themselves, but not before reminding them that he would return tomorrow morning to check the wounds.

Less than half an incense stick the servants gradually disappeared, leaving porcelain jar with
fresh water, a glass of medicine and a couple of sweet fruits to take off the bad taste of medicine.

Lan Huan sighed exhausted and at his side the younger man came over to help him drink some of the medicine.

They both remained silent with thousands of thoughts hovering in
their heads.

Lan Huan never imagined that Jiang Cheng could become so careful or have such soft hands, he always imagined that his exterior was a reflection of his interior, although in the past he didn’t taken the time to get to know him more.
"You have to drink all the medicine, it will help you mitigate the pain and you will be able to sleep better"

It's easy to say,

the older man thought, but he didn't complain and continued drinking until the last drop. Fortunately the fruit that was brought him helped remove
the bad taste.

“I can't believe I will have to keep drinking this medicine for several days, it tastes horrible"

Jiang Cheng raised an eyebrow and stared at him for a long time with a strange expression and then burst out laughing. Lan Huan regarded him with some outrage at
being mocked but then his features relaxed and smiled softly.

His WanYin was smiling and laughing, and for each delicate movement the decorations of his hair swayed and gave a slight clink.
"Are you complaining about the bad taste of the medicine? This is unbelievable!" He scoffed and continued laughing "I have believed for years that your sense of taste is dead"

"Why would it be dead?" He asked confused and slightly cocking his head to the side.
Jiang Cheng saw him in silence and laughed again as well as wondering if his husband perhaps hit his head too.

"Lan Huan, I don't know if you have noticed but from the seven years I have been here in Gusu, my sense of taste has been dying”
The emperor rose a little and sat, his eyes tinkling and his lips showing a soft smile.

"You called me Lan Huan"

However, his words caused panic in the empress who immediately apologized.

“I'm sorry your majesty... it won't happen again"
The emperor's smile trembled, why did his empress look so self-conscious? He was not the same Jiang Cheng of his youth, a lively young man with a rough nature but with a soft interior.

He wanted to ask why he was apologizing, but a memory came to his mind, one where his empress’
voice rang out. It was his first months of marriage in which Jiang Cheng call him by his birth name, but there was a day when he stopped doing it and only addressed him as "Lan XiChen" or "emperor," the worst part is that he never inquired about the reason for that change.
"My empress has no need to apologize to me, you can call me whatever you like."

Jiang Cheng snorted, and while the caress on his hand felt full of tenderness it didn't stop a lump from forming in his throat.

With regret Jiang Cheng released his grip and got up from the bed,
“His majesty is tired and injured, surely the accident he suffered has left him confused"

"A-Cheng...”
The younger male trembled at his call but tried to be firm.

"Your majesty, please..." he shook his head slightly and put back a cold mask to protect himself. He loved hearing that love and devotion in his voice, but it hurt him at te same time.
How much longer would that warmth last?

The empress revered softly and without losing his calm or elegance, the decorations in his hair clinked again. Lan Huan tried to stop him and asked him to stay, but his husband showed a sad little smile.
But he knew that if he stayed, he would enjoy the night sleeping in warm of his husband’s arms, but that happiness it would dissipate as soon as the first rays of the sun entered through the window.

He straightened up slowly and didn’t meet his gaze again,
leaving Lan Huan struggling with the sheets that felt so heavy due to exhaustion and fatigue.

"My spiders will take care of your majesty ..." He walked backwards and with small steps.
The last thing the emperor saw was the small and delicate back of his empress, who turned to give him one last look and whisper sadly.

"I am sure that tomorrow morning things will return to normal"

Finally, exhaustion overcame him and his eyelids closed.
The room was plunged into silence, with spiders at his majesty service and watching over his sleep; the empress could go in peace knowing that his servants were more than efficient and would not allow anything bad to happen to the emperor in his delicate state.
The desolate halls greeted the empress, lit by candlelight and the moonlight streaming through the huge windows.

His guards were placed two behind him, one on each side and two in front of him to avoid any / incident /
Jiang Cheng believed he would calmly make his way to his room, but at the end of the hallway when they tried to turn left they ended up meeting Jin GuangYao and his personal guard.
"I see that his majesty has finally kicked you out"

The empress showed a slight smile.

"I'm left on my own, he must rest"

Only when they were alone there was no need for filters and both could distill the poison and disdain at each other.
Jin GuangYao, despite his annoyance, did not lose his temper and elegance, looking adorable with those exquisite clothes in various tones of yellow and those flirty dimples on his soft and pale cheeks. The empress glared at him with a certain disdain before resuming his way.
“Let me remind you that even though the emperor is confused, it is just that. Even if he asked you to accompany him for a few hours it doesn’t mean anything to him”

With a couple of steps and standing side by side, Jiang Cheng gave him a light glance and curled his lips up.
"Unlike you, I know what my place is. I do not lower myself to the level of a simple concubine or pray for love, I do not seek to give pity and give sugary lies”
“You, insolent!”

Jin GuangYao's face turned dark, the Empress's guards went to defense.

"Do you think you have the power to do something to me? Don't these guards of yours know it's in vain? Only death will they find if the emperor finds a simple scratch on me.”
However, there was no fear in the guards and one of them spoke.

“However, none of us fear death. Unlike the imperial concubine’s guards, we have not been bought and we know where our loyalty lies”
Another of them spoke, "Our loyalty is to our empress and will never be broken, even if that leads us to be executed you should know that the people of Yunmeng are faithful to our lord"
Empress Jiang continued on his way without fear of turning his back, leaving behind a man drowning in his own poison.

Jin GuangYao frowned and retraced his steps towards the emperor's room, being stopped a few steps from entering by one of the spiders
but who was she to stop him? Hearing the commotion, the emperor's appointed servants freaked out and tried to come to the aid of the spiders only to end up with their faces down.

"The emperor must rest," growled one of the ladies, a young woman of rough nature from Yunmeng.
“I know perfectly well, that's why I have come to take care of my emperor"

Another of them faced him and frowned, "However, the emperor must rest... /alone/“
Unfortunately the insistence of the Imperial Concubine Jin reached high levels and in order to not disturb the emperor's rest, they left him to do as he pleases. His servants helped him change clothes for sleeping clothes and comb his hair;
the spiders watched him in silence and hiding expressions of pure disgust.
No one stopped him the moment he lay down next to the emperor, giving him gentle caresses on the chest and kisses on the neck. The servants only returned in silence to the continuous room, with one of them closing the doors and giving the man a hateful look.
With the passing of the hours, Jin GuangYao was in charge of administering care to the emperor, from offering him water when he half woke up thirsty or wiping the sweat that formed on his forehead and placing damp cloths.
Meanwhile in the dream world, Lan Huan was able to feel caresses on his body and sweet words to be whispered in his ears, but the fatigue and pain was so serious that it was difficult for him to pay attention and decipher the owner of that voice.
In that world, he could only relive the last moment when he shared the bed with his husband, the last moment when he shared his empress' birthday in family.

A remote castle dedicated to the empress, the same one that his mother, the Last Empress Lan,
used in her later years where her health had decay.

He was blind in never noticing the changes in his husband, in seeing that that spark of life had been disappearing little by little.

The celebration was small and with just the family, there were no big banquets or music;
only a small dinner in a secluded and open-air place, with the music of a dizi and guqin, he couldn’t even grant him the wish to hear him play the xiao but Jiang Cheng was tired to discuss with him.

Lan JingYi didn't even look at him, what could be expected when he abandoned
his son? A-Yi had grown so much, he was already a fine young man.

For brief moments he saw his husband’s smile, heard him laugh when their son recounted his new exploits or his improvement in classes; but there was sadness in the prince's voice,
he had seen him trying to mature and grow, leaving behind that childish side that only showed behind closed doors with the empress.
His last wish wasn’t about marvelous jewelry or properties, his only wish was to spend a night the two of them on the bed.

"I can’t do that to A-Yao” was his quick reply, refusing and with his back to his empress. If he hadn’t turned to see him, he wouldn’t notice his decayed
and broken expression.

He thought his empress was referring to something else when he simply asked him to sleep in the same bed.

It was awkward at first, he didn't remember when was the last time they lay on the same bed and with Jiang Cheng on his chest.
However, it hurt him to see that tired face with dark circles under his eyes and pale skin; nothing to do with that rosy hue on his cheeks.
Lying on the bed, Lan Huan embrace him by the waist feeling the thinness of the body above him. The fabrics of beautiful dresses were the ones that hid the thinness of the empress and the makeup managed to hide the discomfort that was shown on his face.
At some point where the night had advanced and Jiang Cheng believed his husband was asleep, he opened his eyes to see his face with the help of the moon's rays. His pale lips showed a smile and Lan Huan struggled internally not to flinch with those soft caresses that his empress
was giving him, being surprised at the delicacy that the Jiang had.

"Thank you, A-Huan," he whispered, and finely hugged his husband.

His eyes blurred with tears and they descended until they were lost on Emperor Lan's chest.
“I know that despite our differences, you are an excellent ruler and a good man. A-Yi admires you a lot, you just have to have some patience and gradually approach him; your son loves you”
His words became soft whispers and then the younger male fell asleep, Lan Huan heard small snores and saw the peaceful face of his empress.

There in a room in a remote palace and with the moonlight illuminating them, he witnessed a serene face and which he traced delicately
without even realizing it.

He didn’t even realize the moment he fell asleep, he only let himself be carried away by Morpheus' dream.
When morning came he woke up at the same time as always, with only a few rays of sunlight filtering in and Jiang Cheng still on his chest. He saw him for a long time, staring at that calm face and admiring every little detail that went by for almost twenty years.
His fingers traced the pale and cold cheeks from the cool mountain weather, his thumb traced the long, curling lashes, but as he moved down the cheeks he noticed the shortness of breath.

The emperor's movements stopped and his face filled with concern as he noticed the lack of
In that dream world the emperor saw himself, always panicking when he became aware of his empress's lack of breath or heartbeat.
(This one got me to write this, idk but.. I can feel something, the melody perhaps? )
In that dream world, he could also heard himself raising his voice and asking him, begging him to wake up.

He refused to accept reality and with a shout he call the guards and order them to bring the Imperial physician.
However, there was no medicine or physician in the world capable of bringing a dead person to life. Hearing Lady Wen's diagnosis was devastating, hearing his son cries of pain caused him a feeling of emptiness and his knees to bend, ended up kneeling in front of him empress' bed.
Emperor Lan stared in disbelief at his husband's bed, hoping that this was just a joke or a bad dream. But the calm face of his empress remained the same, Jiang Cheng left with a smile on his lips and his last wish fulfilled.
His body shuddered and his eyes burned, a lump formed in his throat and his palate turned sour; crystalline drops began to fall to the cold floor of that unknown palace where his empress had spent the last few years alone.
His small sob turned into uncontrollable crying, realizing what would have happened if he had ignored the desire of his empress; if he hadn’t stayed, Jiang Cheng would have died alone.
His crying grew and alarmed the servants who had never seen him acting like that, and why would he?

The pain continued in his chest and with that his memories starting with their wedding day, moving on to the day their son was born,
then that afternoon where he secretly heard his son and husband talking.

He listening Jiang Cheng trying to calm the annoyance of his son and clarifying his doubts, but then he heard a confession that was meant to be a secret. He heard Jiang Cheng confessing that he love him.
His empress loved him since his teenage years and he never noticed it, he ignore any progress because there was already someone in his heart but, it hurt.

It hurt to remember the day his empress asked for an audience and confessed that he wanted to abandon his title as empress,
going to the extreme of helping him pass his title on to Jin GuangYao. And finally, to the last years of his husband.

At that time he already knew of his feelings and without knowing why he prevented him from leaving his position as empress, he simply invited him to spend time
in that palace to relax.

When he was free from work, he managed to visit him more often, both took walks in the gardens, or shared tea and snacks during some afternoons. He also refrained from commenting about his relationship with Jin GuangYao to avoid giving him a bad time.
The departure of his empress led him to see the list of mistakes he had made and how his absence became more noticeable every day.

Inside the throne room there was no one sitting next to him to advise him; and at the same time he discovered that it was Jiang Cheng who prepared
that pork rib and lotus root soup on the coldest days in Gusu, he also was the one who secretly sang lullabies when he fell ill and it was difficult to fall asleep.

His empress always showed like a cold and rough person but in the inside he was someone noble and kind,
he simply created barriers to protect himself.
With time and in his absence it became difficult for him to sleep, a part of him continued in denial and at each sunrise he thought everything had been a bad dream. But the image of his empress didn’t appear again, he also received sad looks with condolences
and the distancing with his son grew bigger.

His amber gaze had turned melancholic and even the company of his ‘A-Yao’ couldn’t get him out of that state. He forbade him to be present in his room, because there were certain comments towards his empress that bothered him.
How could he not cry for him? How could he ignore his empress’s death?

And when he finally found solace, it was one night that he visited the desolate room that Jiang Cheng once used. The sheets, despite being washed, still retained his aroma, he also noticed
that the lotus incense helped him sleep more peacefully.
"How hard would it have been to love mother instead of that man?”

Lan Huan stopped in the middle of the room and in front of him his son was sitting on the bed, holding a notebook whose calligraphy he would recognize anywhere.

"Mother loved you, protected you and respected you,
but you never reciprocated his feelings, and now you have the gall to cry?" His attitude and words could be considered an offense and he could be executed, but Lan JingYi was tired.

Many times saw his mother cry in solitude, and heard the servant mutter of how his grandparents
never came to love his mother and how his life became miserable under a simple son of a prostitute.
Lan JingYi sighed with difficulty and with a wipe away his tears, his eyes were red and he had black circles under his eyes after spending several sleepless nights.
“Despite everything mother never made me hate you, he just helped me understand that there was no love between you two and that as much as he loved you he couldn’t force you to reciprocate him”
“A-Yi, I ..."

The teenager shake his head and gets up, walks to his father and hands him the notebook he has been holding.

“It was mom’s, maybe this will help you get to know him a little better"
Lan JingYi bowed slightly to the emperor, but as he straightened up his expression softened and he gave a simple look and smile to his father. He should hate him, and for many nights thought that the emperor must have died and not his beloved mother, however, he couldn’t.
Despite what many think, his beloved mother never came to hate the emperor, he showed him that he should not hold any grudge and that despite everything, Lan Huan was a great man and ruler.
The young prince and future heir to the throne walked next to him, carrying the essence and bearing of the late empress, but with a smile and look very similar to the emperor.

Once alone, the emperor saw the small notebook that his son gave him, that was the empress's diary,
an unfinished diary filled with small anecdotes with their respective dates.
For many nights he hesitate to open it and read it’s content, staying only in his late husband's room and trying to find comfort. The lotus scent was still imprinted, and the cushions hid those tears that no one had seen.
Sometimes he managed to feel gentle caresses and sweet hums of a lullaby, the same one that his empress hum to their son when he was a restless baby who refused to sleep.

“My empress, is that you?"
On the nights when he could not sleep, he always played a small piece with his xiao or had the audacity to see what he could find in the room; the diary was still resting under one of the pillows and many times he resisted the temptation to open it,
first he wanted to see what was in sight and then discover his husband’s secrets.
However, he was surprised to find nothing of value. There was no jewelry more than what an empress should wear and his dresses were according to his status, with the only difference being that the colors and designs varied, creating a harmony between lotus and clouds
or the phoenix surrounded by beautiful flowers.

The jewels were similar to those he saw his mother wear, but there werent any pieces with little of having been acquired. There were no paintings by famous artists, except for those that Wei WuXian or Nie HuaiSang had given him.
Finally, he came to a well-kept chest that concealed a red dress with its veil, and a hairpin that had been carefully placed in the middle.

"Jiang Cheng..."
His hands gently took the ornament and examined it as if it were an exquisite piece, as if it were one of those he bought with attention to his ...

It was a courtship gift, one that caused a beautiful smile and blush on an innocent young man.
From the day they were married, he had seen him use it many times, but he didn’t pay due attention. It looked so well maintained, with no missing parts as if it were new.
His fingers then caressed the exquisite fabric of the red dress with such beautiful embroidery, remembering the warmth he felt when he took Jiang Cheng's hand with his own. They walked side by side, over a floor covered in petals and between the eyes of their families and friends
“You looked so beautiful dressed in red" He then closed his eyes and tried to visualize that moment. He felt the slight trembling of his empress due to the nerves, and in the solitude of the nuptial room, when lifted the veil, he saw an embarrassed and beautiful face.
Jiang Cheng had presented himself as the most beautiful lotus in all Yunmeng and now Gusu, leaving him speechless for a moment.

That night they slept on the separated ends of the bed, wondering why he was forced to marry someone he did not love.
But now in solitude and without his empress by his side, he didn't know what else to think. He had never experienced that feeling of emptiness and where there was always a small silhouette that he chased and called but without a response.

"Forgive me” He whisper.
Anyone would call him stupid. What was he doing looking for comfort in his late husband's room? He had many opportunities to be by his side and listen to his voice, but he does not remember more talks they shared and all of them were short, none capable of giving him information
that would allow him to know his husband as the person he was and not by his title.

In Jiang Cheng’d diary he found a part of him that Jiang Cheng surely struggled to hide and prevent from being hurt, a soft and naive side. In that diary were the secrets of his empress,
his most desired and so simple wishes nothing fanciful.

He wanted a look and a touch, share the bed but just to sleep while holding each other. Sharing a happy life for many years as they watched their son grow and his kingdom prospered.
Finally, it was only when it was too late that he realized how much his empress had endured. Jiang Cheng came to love him for years and take care of him, never revealing his love for fear that what little he had would be taken from him.

He cursed himself like never before!
Why didn’t he rejected the courtship from the beginning?

If he had, surely none of them would have lived through hell and surely Jiang Cheng would have found happiness in someone... else?

The thread of his thoughts stopped and his anger ceased for a moment as he imagined
his empress in someone else's arms or giving shy smiles to a man other than himself. His son ... JingYi, his son would lovingly call someone else ‘father’ and would see him with pride.

The very idea of ​​imagining Jiang Cheng sharing the bed with another man,
dedicating loving words to him or worse... the Jiang did not mind giving their son in marriage, all they saw was a good offer. If he had not accepted, what if they had married Jiang Cheng to someone worst?

His blood boiled when he imagined those scenarios, if the Jiang’s never
looked after the well-being of their son by marrying him, would they do it if his husband was someone else and an abusive?
And it was there when he realized what he felt imagining those scenarios, if someone had tried to raise a hand to hit Jiang Cheng, he surely wouldn’t have reasoned and immediately would have sent that person to prison. But if the setting was different, if his empress was happy
with someone other than him ...

If the words 'my husband' were dedicated to another man, to someone who could have given him a better life, something that he couldn’t... do...

What the hell was going on with him?

“What is this? What am I feeling?”
He was scared to have that kind of thoughts and many days passed in which that confusion didn’t dissipate, if it were not for his uncle and brother, who helped him with his duties while he solved his dilemma he wouldn’t have known what to do.
Unfortunately he was late again and the day he came to a conclusion was the day when the empress' palace was consumed in flames. That room full of small treasures of his empress, were left ashes along with the diary that helped him understand how important he had been.
And far from seeking comfort from his concubine, he simply walked away from him. From one time to another stop sharing the bed with Ah-Yao 'or even talk to him, he knew that in each talk there would always come that question that in his time he believed to be naive and full
of fear, if he would one day ascend to the throne, because his father pressured him and feared him.

Could he really allow someone else to take the place of his Ah-Cheng? He felt that no one was worthy to sit beside him more than him.
But the problems couldn't stop there ...

"Your majesty, you have to find someone else to take the position of empress!"

Did he really thought the council would remain silent? No, but he hope they were aware and will not come to ask such a question in front of his guests and
days before his husband's third anniversary.

Out of the corner of his eye he saw that his son tensed and King Jin's smirk increased, were they really doing that right now?
But what they all wanted was a quick response from him, to corner him and lead him to make a decision that he would regret later like now.
"I know that many must be concerned about the well-being of the country, but I also do not think that a hasty decision is necessary, how could I seek for a new empress when we are close to my husband's anniversary?"

"Your Majesty!"
The council of elders became more daring as well as questioning him. He listened to their excuses and how they gave compliments to daughters and sons of kings and other nobles, reaching the point of pointing out to his Imperial Concubine and telling in front of everyone how
importan ally the Jin were.

"ENOUGH!"

Thousands of pairs of eyes turned in the direction of the only person who had no one close to calm him and prevent him from losing control. The crown prince's gaze was filled with hatred, resentment and outrage.
“This kingdom and most of you are damn hypocrites! Acting as if the anniversary of my mother's death is not important!”

“Young prince, this is an offense! How dare you raise your voice in front of the emp... ”

"SHUT THE FVCK UP!! ALL OF YOU, OH SO FVCKING VENERABLE ELDERS!
Venerable of what ?! All of you are a bunch of fvcking damn old men looking to profit from whoever have the most!! what happened to your stupid rules, uh? I bet you don’t even know sh!t!!!”

"PRINCE LAN, THIS BEHAVIOT IS UNACCEPTABLE!!"
"And what are you going to do, arrest me? Go ahead, do it!" he pause "This is the perfect excuse, isn't it? "

Prince Lan did not show fear but determination, possibly the absence of his mother and having to endure the advance of the Jin over his father's
kingdom make him hit rock bottom.

"If I disappear, father... no, Emperor Lan will need a new heir for the throne!" He spread his arms on each side and gestured with his hands to highlight the importance in his words, his eyes watching each of the guests until he reached
the plague that ended his mother's life.

"What a perfect excuse"
"This is utter disrespect! How can you express yourself that way in front of our honored guests ?! What a shame!"

"Shame?" The crown prince halted his steps and glanced at one of the elders, giving him a gaze as cold and lacking in warmth as he once possessed.
"What? do you want me to stay calm? My mother did a lot for this country, he advised the emperor and was someone who served honorably, and how did all of you repay him?!” His voice raised a couple of octaves,
like the scream of a wounded animal with red eyes for holding back his tears.

His words being so full of truth managed to silence the old man, the great hall became tense with all eyes over the young prince.
“But my words will be ignored and quite possibly Imperial Father will fall back into honey-covered lies. It is incredible to me that nobody is able to see it, how can all of you been so blind?!”
"What do you mean?" Someone else asked, he was wearing luxurious yellow clothes but he didn’t know who was that man.

"Why is everyone pointing at the Jin’s? why is everyone trying to get my father to dispossess a mere concubine fucking concubine from the Jin family?"
“PRINCE LAN JINGYI, HAVE RESPECT!"

"YOU SHUT UP! EVERYBODY TIRES ME! ”

"A-Yi..." Jiang YanLi sitting next to her husband tried to approach the young man but he denied her, even his cousins were worried specially the young mistress.
“In my opinion, the only living and honorable people in the Jin family are only my uncle and cousin, my aunt is still a Jiang but from then on the rest are all leeches thirsty for power. The Jin family seem like the shadow of the Wen”
Words so heavy for someone so young and very similar to what Wei WuXian, husband of Second Prince Lan, had said several years ago. Elders and nobles came to comment on the deplorable behavior of the young prince, concluding
that Wei WuXian was the cause of dirtying the young man's thoughts.

"This is all your fault!" Someone shouted.

"We should never have allowed the Second Prince to marry someone so... so... ahh!"

HanGuang-Jun's gaze turned cold and had it not been for his husband's hand on his,
he surely would have already turned the table and silenced those people with his sword; Even the second prince wore a stern expression at the lack of respect for his mother.
“What could be expected of someone who grew up without a father and whose mother brought disgrace to the Jiang family, to the point in which King Jiang FengMian favor his cousin and son more than his own blood son?”
Wei WuXian felt his blood boil, those were the same kinds of rumors that ended up killing his brother.

“Everyone knows that King FengMian always favored that man's son, but what could be expected of someone like Wei ChangZe? Tsk, the death he had was well deserved ”
‘Such daring words,’ thought Lan QiRen, who at all times had stayed out of the discussion but attentive to the words of his great-nephew. He was not a fan of Wei WuXian, at least not of his misbehavior and how outrageous he was but they had reached the point of creating a truce
and talking without fights in between, it was once a year where both met in the same entrance to a mausoleum.

Lan QiRen's knuckles turned white and his lips parted to intervene. Wei WuXian was a headache, but he is someone he promised to take care of and he wouldn’tdare to break
the promise he made to Wei ChangZe; a promise he made late and at the moment he realized that he had lost the persons who once loved.. that still love, a mistake very similar to the one his nephew Lan Huan had made.
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