I love #InsecureHBO. It's so well written. Issa is messy, aloof & immature. Molly is a high performing people pleaser who is dicovering her boundaries. The crash of their friendship is exactly what happens when someone starts therapy (Molly in previous season).Great work @IssaRae
And to note, I think character of Issa is also going through a transformation, but of different kind. Molly more personal, Issa more career wise. Both still lack things & how the show portrays these voids is so well done I feel the emotion together with them.
Another reflection is that Issa is now learning she has to do things on her own if she wants to succeed & grow up. Help from others is not a constant. Condola shut her out. Molly shut her out. It’s on her to prove she can get stuff done, pick up a phone & get her event in order.
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I’ve recently came to terms that as you improve your well-being, you will have to leave some, if not all friendships that you built earlier in life prior to change. 😕
This feels in particular true if you are changing class position & have less of a scarcity approach to life.
I used to think that if you invest time, money & effort in people, it would motivate for becoming more proactive & change outlooks + outcomes. And to some level it does.
But unless systems they are in support that change, majority just reverts back.
I’ve been very sensitive lately to negativity, anxiety & scarcity that certain friend units share together and have realised that for some it is the only operating mode. This perpetual reality of misery (often misplaced).
Today, we have decided that Chunkie as a company will not seek or take any investments.
We will not make any investor pitch decks anymore, & I will not meet with investors in the future.
Here is my why 🧵👇
1. Let's start with the basics - women do not get funding.
The statistics are so bad that the issue won't change during my life, as it is much worse than this industry is willing to talk about.
2. Marginal winners of funding are only those with friendships & relationships inside the circle.
Fundraising as a woman outside of that circle is a dehumanising & invalidating experience. Especially in the stage, we are in. I refuse to put myself through this anymore.
Let’s talk boundaries. 👌
Few years ago had a collegue I decided to distance from as the friendship ran its course. They kept texting me every few months despite me telling them that at this moment I need time to focus on family stuff. 🧵
As I gave 2 instances of explanations where I said that I can’t give attention & taking time to focus on family matters, they persisted to contact me from text to Linkedin. I was short in initial answers and reiterating the same msg that at this time I am focusing on family.
At this point, I started getting annoyed. I thought about boundaries & when it is appropriate for someone to back off. How many signals need to be sent & is it truly on us to be unpleasant or directly crushing to maintain our right to step back?