Wait, who’s that out there where the waves are like rolling hills, digging its paddle deep into the rolling swells and pulling closer with every stroke as the sun sinks to the horizon behind its broad back? Why, it’s Lo-Fi Lush Hour no. 53! 
Today’s Toast: the fabulous Jungle Bird, invented in 1973 at the Aviary Bar in the new Kuala Lumpur Hilton by (as @k_choong recently discovered) head bartender Ong Swee Teik, alias Jeffrey Ong. So let’s conduct the mandated ablution ritual and get to mixing!
The JB was originally a Jamaican rum drink. My stocks of that nectar are beginning to wobble a bit, but I’ve got these, one rich and the other strong (if you prefer blackstrap rum, you’re on your own; if you’re out, Bacardi plus 2 barspoons of molasses will get you there, +/-).
Plus Jeff Ong’s magnificent curve ball:
And the rest. Rich Demerara syrup in the bottle (2:1). Is fresh pineapple better than canned? Of course. Is this stuff adequate? Yes, and I actually have it.
Tools. I want to do extreme violence to my ice, so I broke out the military-grade, one-pound-fifteen-and-a-half ounce Hollandia Plate shaker. Not necessary, but use your heaviest shaker.
More tools:
So. Butcher the lime and squeeze out half an ounce of juice.
Then a short half-ounce simple:
Ounce and a half pineapple (the original proportions; the recipe that got published in the ‘90s called for 4 ounces; no).
Three-quarters ounce Campari.
And an ounce and a half of rum. I split it between the rich and the strong. Way the news has been going, you might want to just go with the strong.
Load the shaker with ice.
Lock the breech.
And on the way! Shake it like Bob Barr’s glasses were in there with a handful of ball bearings. You want to bust up the ice into shrapnel.
Having annihilated the ice, empty the shaker without straining into your fanciest 16-ounce glass. If your shaker isn’t up to such aggression, you can strain it over fresh ice, cracked or cubed
In a Tiki bar, this would be garnished six ways to Sunday. But this is Lo-Fi Lush Hour, and that “Lo-Fi” meanss we don’t have to worry about that kind of shit. So there stands the glass. Cheers, Mr. Ong!
Today’s Toast has been brought to you by Jamaican Rum. “Yeah mon!”
