Dr. Betina Hsieh 謝原真 Profile picture
Jun 12, 2020 16 tweets 4 min read Read on X
I debated sharing this, but think transparency is important. In a recent anonymous student evaluation, a student said that I came off as "pathetic" for making an off-handed comment about my awkwardness being turned into a meme, while I was online teaching during COVID (a thread)
The student prefaced the comment w/ "this is going to come off as harsher than I mean it," and ended it w/ how awkward it made the class feel when I said it.

Comments like this are unnecessary, dehumanizing and hurtful. 2/
During COVID, while trying to balance online teaching with parenting & everyone in the same room bc of internet connectivity issues, I had moments where I wasn't at my finest. I was open about my humanity w/ my students & struggled to balance everything. 3/
I knew there were meme-creators in my class & encouraged that to lighten an already stressful time in our class. While I know being self-deprecating is not necessary, I also know that this is a result of internalizing years of anything less than perfect being not good enough. 4/
What hurts most about this comment was that it ignored the intentionality of my models of humanizing feedback, the space I created for people however they were, and the intentional 1-on-1 outreach that I made to connect w/ each student. 5/
A second comment noted that people didn't need to share about their lives in this stressful time, and that, while well-intended, this caused the class to miss out on strategies.

If I wasn't explicit about this -- we teach who we are and we teach children who have identities. 6/
Strategies are important in reaching students, but space for people to bring their whole selves in, is critical, especially in times of stress.

We can't teach and learn if we can't be present in a space, even with all the strategies in the world. 7/
Critique pushes us to grow, absolutely, but let's consider if the critique is of someone's pedagogy or their personhood, and even when it is pedagogical, is there a way that feedback can be given that honors a person's humanity in the process? /end
Thanks to all who have been so supportive and affirming. My friend @cath_goulding wrote about this phenomenon and the damage it creates: journal.media-culture.org.au/index.php/mcjo…
I really appreciate people's responses & wanted to just say a couple things: 1) I work w/ future teachers (adults). For K-12 students, I have a different stance & tend to accord an extra grain of grace esp. bc modeling feedback is different than teaching it
2) I understand the spirit of responses telling me that I shouldn't personalize this. I would gently push back on this by saying that (my) teaching is deeply personal; this bothers me bc my heart is in my teaching, so while in the long run, it is a single opinion...
2b)...part of what I teach is the power of words, that words have impact beyond intention & sharing is claiming the right to be vulnerable w/o being labeled "pathetic" & reminding people that when we make light of situations, they often allude to vulnerabilities...
3) Also, as an #AsianAmerican woman in the field of secondary literacy, these attacks feel like racialized & gendered microaggressions, intended or not. So, it's personal & it's not personal, as can be seen by many responses on this thread.
4) I'm so grateful for your love & support, Friends. Your anger on my behalf and love towards me reminds me to always stay true to who I am, even though it won't be understood or accepted by everyone. I so greatly appreciate this. ♥️
One additional comment on this thread -- I notice that people using gendered pronouns in relation to the anonymous comment are using "he" which is interesting bc although I read this comment as both racialized & gendered, I don't know that it came from a male student...
...1 thing that's been very clear to me, in this time, is how insidious white supremacist patriarchy is, such that it could have just as well been a fellow Asian American woman making this comment as a white man. We're not exempt from oppressive systems bc of our own identities.

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More from @ProfHsieh

Mar 27, 2021
Update: I woke up in the middle of the night and saw a message from my sister. As expected, it’s been absolutely brutal. They shot into her house. And are in her street. The military is shooting randomly at any sign of life, trying to scare people into the streets 1/
In the streets, they will be arrested, shot or killed. My sister said someone in her neighborhood was killed and two of her friends were arrested. She is still safe but they are lying on the floor to avoid being seen because the military is still outside in the street. 😢 2/
As of a couple of hours ago over 150 have died just today. I’m sure it’s more now. Please continue to pray for her and her mom, the people and the country as they undergo this terrible violence and humanitarian crisis. 3/
Read 8 tweets
Sep 26, 2020
Let me tell you, I am declaring being done w/ the shame spiral & apologizing for my #AsianAmerican identity. There's a lot of work to do as a community, but we can't do that work, if we can't acknowledge that shame is part of white supremacy that keeps us in our place (thread) 1/
First, I want to shout out Black feminist & linguistic scholars, including the fantastic @BlackGazePod convo w/ Dr. @aprilbakerbell. @DrPorcher & @dr_s_bertrand, your unapologetic stance that Blackness will save Black people reminds me to stand in my own truth 2/
Okay, and also shout out to the fantastic essay by @poetpedagogue that reminds me that we cannot abolish systems that promise us opportunity if we play by the rules until we conquer our own internalized oppressive mindset 3/
Read 9 tweets
Sep 26, 2020
I am finally watching/listening to this week's @BlackGazePod conversation w/ Dr. @aprilbakerbell. From the intro, the idea of internalizing linguistic oppression. Whew! Thank you, @DrPorcher & @dr_s_bertrand for this!
Also, I see you @DrPorcher & @dr_s_bertrand. Knowing you, I could hear in your voices how hard it was to be present in this space with #BreonnaTaylor on your hearts & minds. Thank you for standing for #Blacklinguisticjustice in the midst of it all ❤️
"It's intentional to leave us out of language conversations" --@aprilbakerbell #Blacklinguisticjustice #BlackGazePodcast @BlackGazePod
Read 17 tweets
Sep 24, 2020
Ironically, my TEDx talk on humanizing pedagogies comes out on a day when I had a real human moment. Sometimes we let our frustrations get the best of us & make assumptions about people that we need to keep to ourselves, but let slip out. 1/
In those most human of moments, when we are not at our best, we need to take responsibility for our words and actions, then show grace to ourselves. Grace doesn't make the words go away or excuse the impact, but continuing to stew doesn't help either. 2/
I know that I am very human, even as I conquer my inner desire for perfection. My wise dean @DrK_WhiteSmith reminded me today that we all stumble & sometimes, it takes a minute to recover, but we will not fall, because we have community to lift us up. 3/
Read 4 tweets
Sep 23, 2020
Y'all do not understand how much I missed @BlackGazePod! 1/3 of the way through Episode 1 of Season 2 -- Protect Black Womxn. @dr_s_bertrand & @DrPorcher bringing it again! Also, shout out to @MauricePorcher for the sound effects. The claps though 👏👏👏 1/
Also, got me wondering, has @DrPorcher given me a nickname? Do I need to rethink our relationship? 🤔 @BlackGazePod #BlackGazePodcast 2/
This episode is just so powerful. Centering Black womxn means accepting & affirming ALL that they are: the brilliance, power & drive, but also the softness & humanity #ProtectBlackwomxn #BlackGazePodcast @BlackGazePod 3/
Read 12 tweets
Sep 10, 2020
I didn't want to distract from Scholar Strike the last two days, so I didn't post the #blogpost I wrote yesterday, but it actually works out because I blogged today too & they are pretty nice companion pieces. Sharing them here with you 1/
"I believe in myself. I believe in the healing power of reflection and writing. I am learning, whose voices to listen to, when to listen and how to listen. I am learning how to make space for pain I don’t think I deserve. I am learning & growing & it is beautiful but painful." 2/
Read 5 tweets

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