Extracts from the diary of Mark ne-Francois-Pepys
June 13th 1665
ACT IV
SCENE I. A cavern. In the middle, a boiling cauldron.
Thunder. Enter the three Witches
FIRST WITCH
Thrice the brinded cat hath mew'd.
SECOND WITCH
Thrice and once the hedge-pig whined.
1/11
June 13th 1665
ACT IV
SCENE I. A cavern. In the middle, a boiling cauldron.
Thunder. Enter the three Witches
FIRST WITCH
Thrice the brinded cat hath mew'd.
SECOND WITCH
Thrice and once the hedge-pig whined.
1/11
THIRD WITCH
Johnson cries ’Tis time, ’tis time.
FIRST WITCH
Round about the cauldron go;
In the poison’d Covid throw.
Lockdown, that in care homes
Days and nights have eighty-one
Shiny badges, moral knot,
Boil thou first i’ the charmed pot.
2/
Johnson cries ’Tis time, ’tis time.
FIRST WITCH
Round about the cauldron go;
In the poison’d Covid throw.
Lockdown, that in care homes
Days and nights have eighty-one
Shiny badges, moral knot,
Boil thou first i’ the charmed pot.
2/
ALL
Trouble, trouble support bubble;
Data spurn, and lies redouble.
3/
Trouble, trouble support bubble;
Data spurn, and lies redouble.
3/
SECOND WITCH
Fillet of a Fleet Street snake,
In the cauldron boil and bake;
Eye of newt and toe of frog,
Wool of bat and tongue of Mogg,
Barnard’s cork and Cummings king,
Liz Truss’ tweets and Jenrick’s sting,
For a charm of powerful trouble,
Like a hell-broth boil and bubble.
Fillet of a Fleet Street snake,
In the cauldron boil and bake;
Eye of newt and toe of frog,
Wool of bat and tongue of Mogg,
Barnard’s cork and Cummings king,
Liz Truss’ tweets and Jenrick’s sting,
For a charm of powerful trouble,
Like a hell-broth boil and bubble.
ALL
Trouble, trouble support bubble;
Data spurn, and lies redouble.
THIRD WITCH
Backtrack and trace the truth engulf,
Hancock’s plummy flaw, cry wolf
Of the Raabid salt-sea shark,
Fruits of Sunak sipped i’the park,
5/
Trouble, trouble support bubble;
Data spurn, and lies redouble.
THIRD WITCH
Backtrack and trace the truth engulf,
Hancock’s plummy flaw, cry wolf
Of the Raabid salt-sea shark,
Fruits of Sunak sipped i’the park,
5/
Tories our blaspheming crew,
Gall of SAGE, and cares of few
Distanc’d in the moon's eclipse,
See the smirk on Patel’s lips,
Jus of chlorinated squab
Fridge-deliver’d by a drab,
Make the gruel thick and slab.
Add thereto the Gove’s scrotum,
For the ingredients of our cauldron.
Gall of SAGE, and cares of few
Distanc’d in the moon's eclipse,
See the smirk on Patel’s lips,
Jus of chlorinated squab
Fridge-deliver’d by a drab,
Make the gruel thick and slab.
Add thereto the Gove’s scrotum,
For the ingredients of our cauldron.
ALL
Trouble, trouble support bubble;
Data spurn, and lies redouble.
SECOND WITCH
Cool it with a snowflake’s blood,
Then the down-turned graph is good.
Enter HECATE to the other three Witches
7/
Trouble, trouble support bubble;
Data spurn, and lies redouble.
SECOND WITCH
Cool it with a snowflake’s blood,
Then the down-turned graph is good.
Enter HECATE to the other three Witches
7/
HECATE
O well done! I commend your pains;
And every one shall share i' the gains;
And now about the cauldron sing,
Tabloids and pliants in a ring,
Supplanting all that you put in.
HECATE retires
8/
O well done! I commend your pains;
And every one shall share i' the gains;
And now about the cauldron sing,
Tabloids and pliants in a ring,
Supplanting all that you put in.
HECATE retires
8/
SECOND WITCH
By the pricking of my thumbs,
Something wicked this way comes.
Hands off cocks,
Whoever knocks!
Enter MACFRANCOIS
MACFRANCOIS
How now, you pungent hacks, and midnight wags!
What is’t you do?
ALL
A deed without a name.
9/
By the pricking of my thumbs,
Something wicked this way comes.
Hands off cocks,
Whoever knocks!
Enter MACFRANCOIS
MACFRANCOIS
How now, you pungent hacks, and midnight wags!
What is’t you do?
ALL
A deed without a name.
9/
MACFRANCOIS
I conjure you, by that which you profess,
Howe’er you come to know it, answer me:
Though you untie the winds and let them fight
Against the sciences; though the second waves
Confound and swallow our salvation up;
Though hated quorn be lodged and sleaze abound;
I conjure you, by that which you profess,
Howe’er you come to know it, answer me:
Though you untie the winds and let them fight
Against the sciences; though the second waves
Confound and swallow our salvation up;
Though hated quorn be lodged and sleaze abound;
Though castles topple on their warders’ heads;
Though statues and pyramids do slope
Their heads to their foundations; though the measure
Of Europe’s Germans I’ve had all together,
Even till destruction sicken; answer me
To what I ask you.
FIRST WITCH
Speak.
10/
Though statues and pyramids do slope
Their heads to their foundations; though the measure
Of Europe’s Germans I’ve had all together,
Even till destruction sicken; answer me
To what I ask you.
FIRST WITCH
Speak.
10/
SECOND WITCH
Demand.
THIRD WITCH
We'll answer.
MACFRANCOIS
Have any of you got a charger for a Motorola?
END
Demand.
THIRD WITCH
We'll answer.
MACFRANCOIS
Have any of you got a charger for a Motorola?
END
