Iβve recently came to terms that as you improve your well-being, you will have to leave some, if not all friendships that you built earlier in life prior to change. π
This feels in particular true if you are changing class position & have less of a scarcity approach to life.
I used to think that if you invest time, money & effort in people, it would motivate for becoming more proactive & change outlooks + outcomes. And to some level it does.
But unless systems they are in support that change, majority just reverts back.
Iβve been very sensitive lately to negativity, anxiety & scarcity that certain friend units share together and have realised that for some it is the only operating mode. This perpetual reality of misery (often misplaced).
Today, we have decided that Chunkie as a company will not seek or take any investments.
We will not make any investor pitch decks anymore, & I will not meet with investors in the future.
Here is my why π§΅π
1. Let's start with the basics - women do not get funding.
The statistics are so bad that the issue won't change during my life, as it is much worse than this industry is willing to talk about.
2. Marginal winners of funding are only those with friendships & relationships inside the circle.
Fundraising as a woman outside of that circle is a dehumanising & invalidating experience. Especially in the stage, we are in. I refuse to put myself through this anymore.
Letβs talk boundaries. π
Few years ago had a collegue I decided to distance from as the friendship ran its course. They kept texting me every few months despite me telling them that at this moment I need time to focus on family stuff. π§΅
As I gave 2 instances of explanations where I said that I canβt give attention & taking time to focus on family matters, they persisted to contact me from text to Linkedin. I was short in initial answers and reiterating the same msg that at this time I am focusing on family.
At this point, I started getting annoyed. I thought about boundaries & when it is appropriate for someone to back off. How many signals need to be sent & is it truly on us to be unpleasant or directly crushing to maintain our right to step back?