I'm having such a visceral, pained and admittedly 'flashback-y' response to imagining all the currently undiagnosed children w/ OCD (or trauma) going back to school where they're forced to wear masks.
Young me would've had a straight up terrorized existence that I cannot fathom.
Young me would've had a straight up terrorized existence that I cannot fathom.
Ofc some kiddos will feel relieved by masks if they have germ-based obsessions, understand the virus, and feel safer w/ others in masks. But most who are too young to rationally walk through that will still panic about surfaces, distance, washing, etc anyway.
What about others?
What about others?
I was a kid who had very obvious behaviors/compulsions at 3, but my family couldn't quite place what it was bc I stopped speaking during panic.
But I was convinced I couldn't breathe - permanently - if anything came near my mouth or just couldn't come off.
But I was convinced I couldn't breathe - permanently - if anything came near my mouth or just couldn't come off.
If a zipper broke on a jacket or just didn't zip smoothly, despite zero constriction or proximity to my mouth, I was convinced I'd suffocate. A mask I wasn't allowed to remove? My worst nightmare.
Yet! On the contrary! Back then, I also DID have disease-based fears. Tons.
Yet! On the contrary! Back then, I also DID have disease-based fears. Tons.
I wouldve simultaneously needed everyone loyal to their masks, hawking their handwashing (did they cover every cm?), mentally calculating 6 ft (I'd probably actually carry a double yardstick -- I did for other things back then), and more.
Any slip up? Cold, terrorizing panic.
Any slip up? Cold, terrorizing panic.
Let's be real. I'm 32. I've come a long long long way in my OCD wellness. I *still* do all those things now. This is scary ish.
If I was a kid - with no tools, no diagnosis, no support, AND the entire public "in" on my fears bc they have them too - I can't even imaaagine it.
If I was a kid - with no tools, no diagnosis, no support, AND the entire public "in" on my fears bc they have them too - I can't even imaaagine it.
And yet I'd have had to go to school. My home wasn't safe at all but my parents never would've been down. I just have my heart achinggg for these kids.
Those who will be holding their breath til they faint, wash/pick skin off, count, repeat, refuse entry, panic, etc etc.
Those who will be holding their breath til they faint, wash/pick skin off, count, repeat, refuse entry, panic, etc etc.
All while no one has a clue how to console them, will inevitably make it worse, traumatize them, and so much more.
I've spent the last few days imagining young me trying to do this...and ironically...I haven't been able to breathe.
Pleeeease look for these potential kiddos.
I've spent the last few days imagining young me trying to do this...and ironically...I haven't been able to breathe.
Pleeeease look for these potential kiddos.
