Thread by @kittystryker

Let's talk about male feminists, shall we?

I am exhausted by men claiming to be feminists while simultaneously shutting down anyone who says otherwise, or who asks them to take a step back and look at their behavior.

Today's object lesson - Rob Brezsney of Free Will Astrology.

On the surface, this post looks great - he was informed of his repost being authored by a serial abuser, so he removed it. Cool, right?

Except he deleted multiple women and non binary people telling him this, and then posted like that never happened. Suspicious.

I was curious how long it would take for me to have a post removed asking him about this, and asking him to consider how that appears to others.

Took 17 minutes. Also I was blocked from commenting.

The abuser in question is Franklin Veaux, who has multiple women from the poly community speaking out about his behavior. By not naming him, Rob Brezsny enables and protects him.

THEN when a fan speaks up and links to the voices of the survivors - Rob deletes it, blocks the fan, and posts the link as if it was his own.

INTEGRITY

This is especially infuriating because no one was rude to Rob about this. Just "hey bud, did you know". There was no reason to react in this way. And he silenced women and non binary people by doing it.

Very feminist, right.

Here's the thing. I've been doing consent culture work for over 9 years now.

Every single time a man declares himself a feminist, then is defensive when told some of his behavior needs to be checked?

There's a group of marginalized people in the shadows who have been violated.

Will this hold true for Rob Brezsny? I don't know. I guess we'll have to wait and see. But this behavior, of only leaving up fawning praise saying what an honest person he is when there's proof to the contrary, is a *big* red flag. Like, HUGE.

And it happens every time.

This sort of casual stealing of other people's labor and presenting it as your own, alongside deleting anyone trying to hold you accountable no matter how gently, isn't feminist. It's not social justice.

It's capitalist, white supremacist patriarchy.

It's the status quo.

/fin

Oh, I guess you are on Twitter, Rob. You should probably block me here, too, cause these truths are gonna be uncomfortable.

@FreeWillAstro

@threadreaderapp unroll

Oh the cherry on top - this pat on the back.

Don't be too quick to praise yourself, Rob. 😂😂😂

An addendum, apparently.

This is Rob Brezsny's response to being asked why he's claiming other people's labor as his own and why he's deleting polite comments that ask him to re-examine how he's handling his post of Franklin Veaux's work.

He is doubling down, claiming to be a victim, and demanding praise. He is only allowing posts to stay up that say what a transparent, ethical man he is.

That's fucking suspect as hell y'all.

This is not the behavior of a feminist, or someone who cares about social justice.

This is the behavior of a man throwing a tantrum to try and shut up anyone who dares disagree with his self-assessment.

This is not an ally.

What should Rob Brezsny have done instead?

Thanked people for their labor, in public. Left their comments up. Centered the survivors of Franklin Veaux instead of his own ego. Humbled himself.

Instead, he posts about what a great feminist and advocate he is. 🙄🙄🙄

Hah. Rob Brezsny of Free Will Astrology did in fact block me, rather than take any ownership of his behavior and why it was harmful.

He blocked a *lot* of women telling him that his theft of their labor was upsetting.

What a feminist!

Many men use "feminism" as a cover for their entitlement, like calling themselves a feminist is a shield from any sort of criticism- beware men like this. They consistently end up abusive. These red flags are BIG FLAGS friends.

Rob Brezsny chose to center his ego over survivors.

Now, is this ultimately a huge deal?

No. Not really. He posted something by an abuser. People make mistakes. Whatever.

BUT

What matters is *how he responded*. That's the lesson here. Everyone fucks up. But you get to choose how you respond- that's more telling of your ethics.

If your response to someone saying you stepped on their foot is to shove them away and then loudly screech about your poor scuffed shoes, and how you're the real victim here...

You are a douchecanoe.

I'm still mad, can you tell?

Maybe because I'm sick of white cis men using feminism as part of their brand while their misogyny rages unchecked, especially when they're feminists in the media in part because they ensure no one can ever disrupt that framing with pesky truths.

I wrote about this in 2015.
link.medium.com/QBY28bVG67

I also wrote about it when I started the Consent Culture project, and Safe/ward, in 2011.

I'M SO SICK OF IT