I had a GREAT time at Coventry. One of the last things I packed before leaving home was my duck boots. My feet were dry the whole week I was there. I arrived the Tuesday before the show. So, I didn't encounter any traffic. My crew had our own VIP trailer, complete with shower.
I was working the night shift running the info booth, so the first night I stayed up all night to get used to it. I had the trailer alone to sleep during the day. I at the mess tent. Excellent food. By the way, I worked for the catering company at the Great Went. 3 weeks in ME.
While my job was to be in charge of the info booth, what I mainly did was play secretcabdriver. I had access to a John Deer Gator. I drove around all night waiting for someone to ask for a ride. That's how you got a ride, by asking. I never offered a ride.
I gave close to 75 rides over the 4 nights people were in the campground. I had a whole banter I would do with each "fare". I would say for example, "You're the 7th person to ride in the secret cab tonight". I would tell them that I couldn't charge them, but tips were accepted.
I had a couple of "rules". They had to have a destination, no joy riding. And, if I was called on the radio to help back at the info booth, the ride was over. I got all that out of the way early on. In the real world at the time I was a limo driver. So, they all got limo service.
Like riding in a limo, people had many different reactions to getting a ride. Some sat back, enjoyed the ride, glad to be off their feet for a while. They were happy to get to their destination quickly. Others waved their arms and screamed WOOOO HOOOO!
But there was a more comical reaction. Image it's 3 am. I'm tooling along at "funeral" speed. I'm wearing a staff shirt and a lammy. Inevitably, someone would say, "Can you give me a ride?". I would immediately stop. When they got in they would say, "I thought you were security".
Occasionally a person would come up and say that they would pay me $10 to take them to the other side of the campground. I'd say get in. Again, I would give them my schpiel about this being the secret cab and that it was free. All but one paid what they offered.
One group offered $30 to go to their friends car near the entrance, grab all their gear, and take them all the way to the far side of the lot. 4 people got in. We loaded up their stuff. 2 people had to walk back, wouldn't fit. They carried only pillows back. It took 45 minutes.
There was a shuttle bus for the mile ride from VIP camping and the campground. I sometimes gave rides to our crew back to our trailer. On the way back, I would park at the shuttle stop. It wouldn't take long before I had my next fare. That was usually good for about a $2 tip.
Coventry wasn't the only time I played sercetcabdriver. I did the same thing at Oswego, Big Cypress, and IT. It was all part of the festival vibe. We (staff) all wanted to help you guys enjoy the weekend. Being a limo driver, giving rides to sore foot people was a natural.
Fast forward to SPAC last summer. I ran into this woman who it turns out follows me on twitter for the stats. She asked about my handle. I told her the story. When I finished, her eyes lit up. She told me she had gotten a ride from me at Coventry. 15 years later she remembered.
Another thing she remember was seeing me after the festival was over. At 10 AM on Monday, I was off the clock. I was planning on going back to the trailer and getting some sleep. At about 9:30, a few people came to the info booth asking why traffic leaving was so slow.
They said they hadn't moved since midnight. I got in the gator and drove down to the campground exit. What I saw was shocking. Traffic on Airport Rd was bumper to bumper. There was no one directing traffic out of the lot. One car at a time fought its way to get on the road.
I parked the gator, grabbed an orange cone and put it down on the center line of the road. I held my hand up to stop traffic on Airport Rd. Then I waved for the traffic in the lot to start moving. When traffic backed up, I stopped the lot, and let the road move again.
After a while, I got on the radio and called HQ. Told them to send someone to replace me. I had been up since about 5 Sunday afternoon. They said they would get back to me. The day shift info booth boss called looking for a ride to work. I told him what I was doing.
He yelled into the radio, "That's not your job, come and get me!" I yelled back, "Send someone to relieve and I will!" Once you start directing traffic, you can't just stop. Chaos would ensue...again. So, kept doing it. The day boss came and took the gator.
Obviously, I hadn't planned to be directing traffic. My raincoat left with the gator. I wasn't wearing my duck boots. And, of course, it poured again. I was wearing the loudest tie-dye you'd ever seen. I had an Al's French Frys cap on my head. (Burlington people will get it)
Before leaving to check out the traffic, I had just taken off my duck boots and put on my sneakers. Big mistake. I didn't have any food, water, or cigarettes! And, the porta-johns were a couple of hundred yards away. Still no word back from HQ. I was stuck.
Every now and then are car would come up the hill going full speed. I had to make sure traffic was stopped coming out of the lot. When it was a police car, I would yell, "You should be doing this!" By the way, no one ever came to take my place.
But, like the giving community that we are, my needs were (mostly) met. A girl selling cigarettes gave me a pack. People in stopped RVs gave me sandwiches and sodas. A lot of people took my picture. But, mostly people said thank you. (between people yelling YO Al's French Frys!)
One thing I did have with me was my stash tin. It turned out to be the perfect prop. I bought it at TAB show a few years earlier. When traffic was stopped, which was a lot of the time, I would pull out the can and hold it up. 
I want to wrap this up. Again, no one came to replace me. I was doing red light, green light all day. I started at about 9:30 in the morning. At 7:30 that night, there was no more line coming out of the lot. I raised my hands above me and yelled, "I just emptied the lot".
I immediately took off for the porta-johns. Just as I came out, the day boss pulled up in the gator. Perfect timing. I hopped in and told him to take me to the mess tent. I was starving, and beyond tired. I'd been up for about 27 hours.
When we got to the mess tent, one of the first people I ran into was Dave Werlin. You may not know him, but he was the guy running the show. He was the boss of Great Northeast Productions. I went right up to him and quickly told him my story.
I said, "I just got a thousand thank yous for emptying your lot. Not my job by the way". He reached his hand out to shake mine. All he said was, "One thousand and one". The next day I told the story to the chief of security. He said one thousand two.
Getting back to the woman at SPAC. I asked her if she remember leaving the lot at Coventry. Without prompting, she said she thought it was strange that this dude with a loud tie-dye was directing traffic. She thought it was some local. I just said, "No, that was me".
It was fun having story time again. Some of you already have heard this story. It's nice thinking back to Coventry. I always smile when I hear people say how bad it was. I say it was a miracle it happened at all. None of you know how close it was to being Curveballed.
Well, that's it. Thanks for following along. And, as always, thanks @phish.
P.S. The next day was my birthday.
