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Personal Finance Lesson From A Boss: Cut Your Cloth According To Your Cloth

Before then, what I had always heard was 'cut your cloth according to your size'. Dateline was 2002 and I was planning for my wedding. I was 27 and my bride was 25.
I had been working for about 2 years then but the responsibilities were huge. To many of my friends, it was too early for me to commit myself to the institution of marriage. My bride had barely graduated from the University and had not even gone for the mandatory National Service
Apart from just moving into a sparsely furnished apartment of mine, I had barely nothing. But I felt that was the right time to get married.

In my part of the world, having a wedding ceremony is a big deal.
I drew up a list of all I needed to do with the help of my friends and suddenly I became very afraid. My friends included what in their opinion was mandatory for a man to buy as the wedding approaches.
How could I shoulder the responsibility of bearing the huge financial costs of the ceremony? The bridal list given to me by my in-laws was very long. I was in dire straits. There was no other place to turn to.
As my colleagues at work and I discussed about the coming event, my boss passed by. Obviously he heard our discussion because he later asked me to see him. After asking how the preparation was going, he told me, 'Bayo, you need to cut your cloth according to your cloth'.
He explained that if I cut according to my cloth, I can use the cloth to sew a petticoat, a shirt or a boubou depending on the length. He spoke to me extensively about doing everything within my means.
He told me that the wedding ceremony was just for one day while the marriage itself was for a lifetime. He counseled me not to heed the counsel of my friends but to go ahead and prune my list. He shared with me the story of his friend whom I later met some years down the line.
My boss was the best man at his friend's wedding many years ago. Amidst laughter, he told me they went to a popular Lagos trading spot called 'Mandillas' in Lagos Island to buy 'cut and sew' materials for the wedding suit because that was what they could afford at that time.
I heeded his counsel and set to work immediately. I pruned my list. I threw out what was not important. I concentrated only on what was priority. As part of the bridal list, I was asked to buy a brand new leather bag filled with different new clothes and accessories for my bride.
My list contained the type of clothes I was to purchase including organza, lace and other exotic materials. I was asked to buy a goat and so many food items like tubers of yam and bags of salt.
I approached a friend of mine who got married a few months before I did and asked him to borrow me his brand new leather suitcase. I stuffed the suitcase with old clothes being worn by my bride. I padlocked it and put the keys in my pocket.
Instead of a goat, I put a few naira notes in an envelope. I bought half the number of tubers of yam I was asked to bring and I did the same for all other items.
I also positioned some of my friends to watch over the food items I brought because I had the intention of taking some of them back with me after the ceremony. After all, my wife will not go hungry in my house after the wedding event.
During the traditional engagement ceremony, I brought out the suitcase. The female engagement compere wanted to open the case but it was locked. I was asked for the keys but I pretended as if I was looking for it whereas it was safely tucked away in my pocket.
Not willing to delay the ceremony, the compere went on. When they asked for the goat, I exclaimed as if I forgot. I offered them the money I prepared in exchange for it. Immediately, the event was over, I carried my bag of salt. I took a few tubers of yam back into my car.
I negotiated and got concessions for some other items. For example, the invitation cards were done for me free of charge by a very benevolent elderly man. We got a good rebate on the hall we used for the wedding reception because the porter is related to my father-in-law.
My best man was my colleague at work who was seated in the next cubicle to mine. The hall and the vehicles were decorated by my wife and her friends so I didn't spend a dime on that. I contracted an old schoolmate of mine as the photographer so it was affordable.
My suit was sewn by a tailor at Ekotedo in Ibadan. My wife had her wedding gown sewn by a very lovely young male tailor at Agbowo area of Ibadan. Our honeymoon was at a Christian entertainment spot called 'Encomia' in Bodija area of Ibadan.
The owner was my friend and customer and I got a good rate for the place also. Overall, it was a great event and I didn't have to pay through the skin of my nose.
I learnt a great lesson during that event. Since then, I never bother myself about what I can't afford. I simply plan and live within my means. I would never go into debt in order to satisfy other people.
Too many people spend the money they don't have on things they don't need to impress people who don't care. Learn to live within your means.

"Don't go broke trying to look rich. Act your wage"- Unknown

(Excerpts From My Book 40 Lessons I Learnt Along The Way)
Available by sending a DM to @Rovingheights

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