"Calling the police may lead to the brutalizing (or even killing) of the victims themselves."
Horribly irresponsible claim in the context of providing DV resources. A victim is far, FAR more likely to be seriously harmed by an abusive partner than by a police officer.
When I was being stalked last year by someone who had threatened to rape and kill several women, I called the police. They set up a sting and they caught him. Nobody was injured. He is in jail now and he is going to trial next month.
The SVU sergeant who interviewed me directed me to a non-profit for help obtaining a civil restraining order. I left several messages but was never able to get them on the phone.
I don't want to pick on the good people doing that work, but it's supplementary, not an alternative.
I did eventually obtain a civil restraining order — after several months and three court appearances. But because I had filed a police report early, I was *also* much more quickly given a criminal protective order — with stronger protections and no hassle on my end.
In order to get the civil restraining order, I needed someone to serve my stalker with notice. The same SFPD sergeant who handled my criminal case freely offered to do this for me. He returned my calls. He encouraged me to call if I ever felt I was in danger.
I wish I could publicly share this officer's name, because he was my champion and he deserves recognition for what he does for women and other vulnerable people in SF.
But it's 2020, and it's twitter, and I know I can't do that.
One final thing: going to the police protected me, but it also gave me the opportunity to provide evidence critical to some counts concerning other victims. My stalker is going to trial on 11 total charges. Only two of them concern me.
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tbc I don't think obscure basic or applied research is the place to try to trim fat either, but it's a powerful thing to show people what someone like themselves is buying for the federal government and it's a study about 'roided up hamsters or whatever
I think even smaller decrements will REALLY fire up the typical person, e.g. contracts for $600 hammers
Because most people in this country spend a lot of time thinking about whether to buy the slightly-better-thing when the price difference is like $10
I'd also have had a hard time believing the "Venezuelan gangs are taking over apartment complexes" story if I hadn't had my own utterly insane experience with tenant protection bureaucracy
I think everyone will find something to dislike in my take on Dylan Mulvaney, which is that there is obviously a desperate cultural thirst for someone, anyone, to just wholeheartedly enjoy being a girl in a way that is politically acceptable — and this is probably a good thing!
I do find it reductive and a little bit embarrassing, but man, the culture we have has got to start somewhere. The idea that there is *anything* good about femininity has been MIA for what, a decade? Longer?
While I'm digging my hole, I think trad culture could probably take a note here because a lot of it does come across as very... Girlboss, But With Apron. At times, it delves into "our way is better because it takes 20x as long and hurts." This is not the way, not always
My mom's home in Oregon is being seized by "friends" who she allowed in a few months ago, who now refuse to leave & have literally stolen keys to her outbuildings. It's impossible to navigate her rights & obligations because local housing lawyers are booked up w similar conflicts
They moved two additional people in; mom can't afford to go anywhere else, so she has four people who live rent free in her house and glower at her as they go to and fro, leaving their dishes for her to clean and taking hour-long showers
You cannot imagine how bad tenant-landlord law is in some of these coastal states