our anxious 4yo recently learned that all humans die. it was really tough, we all cried, but we got through it.

today he found out that all humans die at DIFFERENT TIMES and he's LIVID
"who's going to die first??? which one of us?? are you going to leave me alone in this house while you turn into dirt?? i can't reach the cereal!!!!"
apparently he previously thought humanity would "all stop living together," in some sort of mass extinction event, and that was totally fine with him
pleased to report he's much calmer this morning; his main concern now is who gets our house when we die and whether or not they will throw his toys away. he has also asked if we can open gifts now, "in case we all die before christmas," so i think that's the bargaining stage?
jesus he just looked at the dog and asked "will jelly bean die?" and look, we have been honest and straightforward through all of this, but i said "maybe" bc human mortality is one thing but it's absolute horseshit that dogs die
okay muting this now, for the sake of anxious kids everywhere i am begging you: wear your masks and get the vaccine

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More from @AlixEHarrow

7 Jun
if you need a moment of light in this tense and terrible time, i want you to know that my husband thought a pony was a baby horse until exactly six minutes ago.
this man is 33 entire years old. he has a college degree and works in a library. i--
okay wow, this thread did not go the way i thought! to the city kids who never read the Chincoteague books, baby horses are called foals and they look like two pairs of stilts wearing a hat. ponies are called ponies and they look like well fed stuffed animals. foalpony
Read 5 tweets
8 Dec 19
friends! countryfolk! THE TEN THOUSAND DOORS OF JANUARY ebook is still on sale for $2.99 in the US and UK! in an act of shameless self-promotion, i present to you this thread of very good books paired with their doors:
strange the dreamer by laini taylor. a fantasy adventure and love story, but also a meditation on trauma, healing, history, and the aftermaths of conquest.
indiebound.org/book/978031634…
middlegame by seanan mcguire. do you like wizard of oz, but want it 800% darker, contemporary, and necromantic? well--indiebound.org/book/978125019…
Read 12 tweets

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