For some reason I always thought the the final years of modern human civilization would be less saturated with sheer stupidity
Even in Michael Bay movies when an asteroid is heading toward the earth they send up a team of specialists to stop it. They're not like "deleting the asteroid's twitter is unconstitutional!" or "if we do something about the asteroid it might get mad and hurt us!"
"No, it's not that asteroid hurtling directly towards us that's the problem, it's the antifasteroids!"
Please note that I didn't say I didn't think the final days would be without stupidity. I said even I, a person whose small claim to fame is crawling around the carcasses of failed institutions, did not think they would be this stupid.

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More from @abandonedameric

9 Jan
Oh my Lord, this sad bastard creating new accounts so he can whine about being kicked off Twitter has to be simultaneously the most pathetic and most hilarious end to any world leader's tenure ever.
I redid my previous tweet of this because it showed some of the tweets (which are the same deleted ones from his POTUS account) and supposedly Twitter is deleting accounts reposting screenshots of that - who knows? Didn't want to run the risk just in case
Is it real? I mean, the spelling is correct so maybe not but otherwise it sounds like him. You know what, I don't even care. It's so funny either way and I needed to see him running from account to account with @TwitterSafety chasing him down, Yakkety Sax blaring in the bg.
Read 7 tweets
9 Jan
Hmm. Very weird how so much of the #WeAreTrump movement seems to come from Brazil. Almost as though somebody paid for a bunch of accounts to tweet support for it to get it trending 🙄
To the folks chiming in that Bolsonaro followers like Trump, first: thanks for sharing the perspective with me, and nice to meet you! Sorry you have a bad leader too. But click farms often skew towards one country when people pay for tweets and followers also.
So when I see one country dominating tweets in a topic and they don't have a lot of similar content in their feed, it is suspicious to me. I still doubt so many people from Brazil just all decided to make that trend. I'd feel the same way if was, say, Turkey.
Read 6 tweets
7 Jan
I don't think it's that hard to connect the dots that this was planned in advance by Trump and people he installed in the Pentagon and it was hoped that the crowd would capture or kill some of the people in the Capitol.
The open planning on places that should be monitored like Parler, the selling of merchandise like shirts advertising Civil War on January 6, the open threats by Trump's inner circle, the refusal to send the National Guard, Capitol Police welcoming the rioters in. Planned.
So if it was planned, what was expected? That a mob of people invited to storm the Capitol with rhetoric including Lin Wood's threats of executing Pence - these people would convince lawmakers with rhetoric? Of course not. Had they not been evacuated there would have been blood.
Read 7 tweets
7 Jan
My favorite bit of whataboutism going around with the right at the moment comparing Trump terrorists storming the US Capitol building and chasing out lawmakers with people looting a CVS, because those are apparently roughly the same thing to them
"Well, somebody robbed the gas station in my town a few years ago, so the British sacking Washington DC in the War of 1812 was totally justified."
I also am a big fan of the claims that protestors "burned cities to the ground" by people who have apparently never been to a city and don't know that they have more than one building, so if one burns there are more still available
Read 5 tweets
7 Jan
Boy it would really suck to be a social media manager for a brand account today like "WTF do Cheetos even have to add to this discussion"
"Enjoy Cheetos safely, away from the US Capitol building!"
Hey folks, Chester Cheetah here. I'm usually just about a good time with some hot snacks, but you know what's REALLY dangerously cheesy? Treason.
Read 4 tweets
7 Jan
1/ A day or so after Thanksgiving, we buried our good friend Patricia, who died from Covid. I was a pallbearer, which was a first for me and more emotional than I thought. You're literally carrying a friend in a box to a hole in the ground. The funeral was where I caught Covid.
2/ Anyway, I'm one of six guys carrying the coffin with both hands because those things are pretty heavy and you don't want to drop it. The ground's uneven and you want to be dignified but it's hard keeping in sync with everyone else.
3/ As we're almost at the grave, the phone belonging to the young guy next to me rings. Must not have put it on silent. It's this crazy heavy metal riff: "DUN DUN DUN DUN DUN DUN DUN RAH RAH RAH RAH RAH RAH RAAAAAAH!" He can't get it because, you know, he's carrying a coffin.
Read 7 tweets

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